Fear. Its contagious.
I wasnt that worried. For a while. Here and there i would get a little bit nervous with my thoughts of what if. But always able to get past it easily.
Just picked up a few extra things here and there. We figured there was going to be some hoarding so why not have a few things right? Last week i went to Costco because all of a sudden, the stories started to grow and i thought maybe we should actually stock up. Because it was the first day where we were planning to distance ourselves.
When i arrived, the 12 tills were obviously full, the pier at the edge of a huge sea of tp mountained carts and heads. People at least had the good sense to leave their kids at home. Hysteria brings common sense in for some i guess.
The sea lineup wasnt even the worst of it. The sea is fed by two streams on the two sides normally (on such busy days like Victoria Day weekend or the week before Christmas). Those two streams go all the way to the back of the warehouse. (Meat and produce departments).
For those of you who have never been inside a Costco, they are HUGE (at least huge is the only size i have seen them come in).
So, the sea didnt surprise me, the streams, also not so much as i have seen that same old shit before. What DID surprise me is the granola bar shelves were broken apart in the middle and there was a third stream feeding the sea which also went back to the meat department.
Well, i sighed as i knew what i was getting myself into before i even got to the parking lot, before i got an actual parking spot.
Wtf am i rhyming or something??
Anyway, we were pretty much fine for supplies but not sure how long we would need to be.
So i stocked up. On everything. Two or more of everything. Shampoo, conditioner, soap, food, canesten.
Yes, canesten. There may be a huge change to how the world turns, but yeast knows nothing of the world, does it? It just knows to grow and spread.
I was remaining calm. Breathing. Mumbling to myself. Joking with other people with how we all are crazy.
And hands shaking. Literally shaking. I was having an anxiety attack. But ive never had physical symptoms like that before. Not visible to others, anyway. I could barely push my cart. It was so heavy. And now that feeling was spreading throughout my body.
I survived it. I knew i would. My husband, through text, kept telling me its ok. We will get through this. It helped. But it seems like in the big picture it will take a long time. This isnt just going to stop in 2 to 4 weeks. Lets be real here. They want us to slow it down. But it isnt going to stop.
Im losing clients as i type this as there are layoffs galore and we havent even been hit all that badly. We really havent.
Over time, as you see the shelves change...see them dwindle, (tp was first thing, only god knows why, im still baffled)...then shelves start to empty...then theres no meat. At all. Nothing.
So now i am really starting to fear the future. Now i worry because the fear is more contagious than covid is. And this early, with so few cases in my country, with people losing their shit this badly this soon...i am what iffing again. If supplies turn into a problem because hoarders cant stop then people will get desperate when they have an actual need.
And thats where im feeling the need to have a gun in the house.
What if we are in that position, or people try to steal our supplies to sell...we will need protection. And i have NEVER EVER felt that need in the past.
Covid, fear, hysteria...it all spreads and if any of those were yeast, all the Canesten in the world wont ever stop them.