I'm scared that I might be heading down that slippery slope into depression again. It could have started with Post-traumatic stress symptoms which added on to the ongoing vicarious trauma and eventually burn out that I might be experiencing.
I'm scared because I don't want to go down that road again, but I am suspicious and I am feeling lousy that I am not doing as well as I hoped (although I know I shouldn't compare with the many out there who can't get a job)
I am scared because I know if I need time to recover, but why is it always me that needs time to recover from a possible burn out. What is it that I am not doing well enough?
I'm tired and I'm scared. I'm stressed and I'm worried.
I don't feel safe and I feel like I am not good enough (when it may not be true).
I cannot see the world the same way because I feel that everyone is just out there to do harm. I think, that is in part due to vicarious trauma.
You can tell my thoughts are all over the place because they jump from point to point...