I was getting ready to go to bed but dread came over me. That deep depression feeling, not as strong a foreboding though. Just dread.
I must get the blood test in the morning. I was going to go this morning but decided not to. I dread it. What if the test results show I have...it? I've just had so many doctors and appointments and illnesses that I don't need another. However, this, if I'm diagnosed, will explain my hyperhidrosis (constant profusely sweating). I'm nervous about the morning.
I was researching the Law of Attraction again and printed out some pages, and there were 10 pages when I thought there were only 3. I did not copy and save the other 7 pages, I know I didn't.
Must be the ghost. Just like tonight, my lorazepam and abilify were not in the medication holder. I know I put them in there. I know I did!! The Potassium was gone too.
The ghost was playing with my lighter again today. Making me think I'm crazy. I searched the entire bed. Got up and went to the bathroom. Then came back and the lighter was on the bed.
It's been happening for many years now. It doesn't surprise me, I just wish the ghost would not take things when I need them the most.
Today I got my Archangel Mikael cards in the mail. 44 oracle cards and booklet.
I'd like to use it once a day to see what he wants to tell me that day. He guides everything - and I notice how perfect it all falls into place.
I saw a lot of my numbers today. However, when I don't think about them, I see them. When I do think about them and want to see them, I don't see them.
My and my brother's birthdays I saw today, one after another.
I ordered myself a small broom and dustpan, brown, dustpan is plastic and broom is wood, shaped like a violin. I've needed one forever. I bought a homemade broom once but it's too brittle, I think it was only for decoration. The only reason I'm buying one is because I can never find a small one in stores.
Walmart has been crazy. Everyone's walking around like zombies. I won't get into it further. It's just insane.
Got some apps on my phone, showed my niece and she loved to use them. But she didn't want them on her phone. Another thing about her that... makes me sad... is that when I tell her I love her, she never says it back. NEVER. She does to everyone else. Just not me. I helped raise her 1/2 way. Her brother though he lived with us basically, so I totally raised him.
I feel lost right now. So lost. Lonely. Scared because it's dark in here and (it's 1:11!!! some of my numbers!) .. and I'm scared because when I am busy I see things in the corners of my eyes. Shadows and white smoke puffs when I'm not smoking.
And my back has been hurting real bad lately. The middle to the top of my butt.
Gosh I'm so congested. I've got something. Taking meds for it. Takes a long time to heal I guess. I had flu shot this year, I shouldn't have got it. I've been sick ever since.
I hope I'm allowed to post a video, and hope it shows up. This is for everyone here, this is my Spirit Life Coach with a good message: