One of my dreams for many years was to have a big heartbreak.
I had never had one and felt I was missing out. I knew it was a symptom of my inability to fall in love.
Then it happened. I fell in love. For the first time in two decades. She was not available. There was no possibility. I was, and still am, crushed.
I'm living the dream.
I'm glad I now have the ability to attach myself.
This came with a price.
I found out that the other side of love is loss.
The more you love something, the harder the loss.
The harder the distress. The bereavement. The crying. The hopelessness. The powerlessness.
I'm also finding out that I have more strength in me than I thought.
This situation is forcing me to rebuild myself.
It also brought me closer to other people who've been through the same thing.
And these might be better gifts than if I had ended up with this particular person.