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Injustice ..... or Justice?


RiverLight

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I feel rage. I want to scream at him at the top of my lungs. I want to kick him in the balls and watch him squirm in pain. The injustice of the false accusations, treating me as though I were to blame and the one who mistreated HIM. The cruelty of his words aimed to hurt me like sharp daggers. How dare he treat me this way. I do not deserve it one bit. For two years, I gave nothing but my loving heart, my kindness, compassion, patience, understanding and support. I gave him all the beauty of my heart that I have to offer. I even loved his daughter and gave my all to her. And what did I get in return? Emotional manipulations, twisted lies, cruel accusations, berating mean insults, demeaning comments, control, bullying, and abuse. It was psychological warfare aimed to control me, put me down and make me feel bad about myself and insecure. The characteristics and objective of abuse. And he treats me now as though I had been the worst girlfriend ever, as though I deserve his cruelty and shunning. I have not been taught how to handle anger properly. I was taught to suppress it. Well here I am expressing it! And he deserves all of my anger and rage.

But I know the truth of the matter. His version is a very sick and twisted, extremely skewed version of reality created by the mindset of an emotional abuser. All that really matters is the true reality, the reality that I see, know and feel to be true and accurate. He can live in his seriously warped, false world and believe what he wants to believe. He can place all the blame on me if he wants to and make me out to be the evil one. He is malevolent, poisonous, mentally sick and extremely toxic. Good riddance! Thank God I saw the light and broke up with him four months ago. Thank God I know the difference between true love and abuse. Thank God I believe in myself enough to know what I truly deserve. And thank God I stood up for myself, did not allow him to manipulate me, and I pushed back. He is a varment, a slug, a scum of the earth. He is scum on my shoe. I was far too good for him, and deep down inside he knows it.

He deserves to suffer. And that he will. He already is. He must be one miserable person to treat someone he claims to "love" with such cruelty and spite. Only those who are miserable themselves try to deliberately inflict emotional pain on another. And only those who are deeply insecure and feel inferior themselves inflict abuse on another. I see and know the truth and that's all that really matters. What he thinks no longer concerns me. Perhaps the sweet arms of Karma will bite him in the ass one day. But as they say, the best revenge is to simply be happy yourself. And that I am. So perhaps there is justice afterall? I found true love, and what does he have? Nothing but misery. He is alone and miserable. So I will skip happily away from him with happiness in my heart and peace of mind in knowing he is out of my life forever.

Stopping the war

Every bruise you gave me
Has become
a battleshield

Every scar you gave me
Has regenerated
Stronger skin

You can't touch me now

Every bone broken by you
Has healed

Every tear shed for you
Has long since dried

You can't reach me now

I'm peaceful
I've stopped the war
You can't hurt me
Any more



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I'm so glad that you're processing this and getting it all out of your system, Riv. Getting rid of a bad ex is like getting rid of a virus...even after its gone, you've got to cough up all the phlegm and get out the rest of the crud. Its the last step before being all the way recovered, and I'm glad you're almost there! :hugs:

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2 hours ago, carter_burn1 said:

I'm so glad that you're processing this and getting it all out of your system, Riv. Getting rid of a bad ex is like getting rid of a virus...even after its gone, you've got to cough up all the phlegm and get out the rest of the crud. Its the last step before being all the way recovered, and I'm glad you're almost there! :hugs:

thanks so much, and well said! It IS like getting rid of a virus and all that nasty phlem, lol. Cough cough. lol.

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