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Dark Clouds Over Us...


RiverLight

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There are dark clouds hanging over us right now. I fear the next time he gets upset with me. I feel a bit like I'm on egg shells, waiting for the next blow up. It happens rather infrequently, but when it does, it's bad. Now I'm afraid of mis-stepping at all.

This weekend we had an awesome time, but Fri night I was very anxious, on edge and uncomfortable around him. Then I eased into the weekend and everything was back to "normal" and we had a lot of fun. But still, I see the clouds there and sense their ominous presence.

What am I doing? I am holding onto someone because of all the positives there and love him dearly, but this may ruin us. He needs to change his behaviors, and I don't know if he can. I haven't seen any changes yet and he's been aware of this issue with him for months now. I pray that this therapy appointment helps us. I am putting a lot of expectation on it right now to help us through.

Am I afraid to be alone and single? I don't know. I know I can do it if I need to...... I have walked away before from unhealthy relationships. I can do it again, if need be. But today, I feel the clouds, despite our fun together.

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