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Outsider Of Outsiders

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I'm going to that youth activity center. It's for youth that have social or mental problems. On Friday it's someone's birthday party. It seems as though they've invited everyone except me :(

That's so funny when you think about it. Even in a group of outsiders that are usually left out of a group, I'm the only outsider out of them. The rest are insiders. I'm that hopeless. I couldn't get a friend/gf to save my life (as a figure of speech).

In other news online I happen to be doing kinda well. My ex-gf wants to chat with me online so that's kinda nice to talk with her cos maybe that leads to visiting me which would make me happy. We prolly won't get back together, but that's okay. There are other fish in the sea, I know that. Speaking of which I kinda voice chatted with a girl that I've been chatting with for a while. These may seem like small things, but I have nothing to lose. It's like I'm making progress to achieve my ultimate goal of finding a partner that I have kids with. Maybe it's neither of the previously mentioned girls, but there's a chance it might be. So now I'm spending some time and energy on those relationships, and if that doesn't work out, I'll start chatting with someone else. No big deal.

And if you wonder why it's online and not live that I have to chat with girls is that it's no secret that my appearance is not pleasing and also I have Asperger's which is mild autism. So online is better in every way. I can create a bond with a girl before showing my face. Then when I show my face, the bond is so strong that they prolly want to be with me still despite my appearance. That's my clever scheme, hehe :tounge:

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