I just had my one year of sobriety and I thought at first that I would never make it to one year, but I did. On my one year which was June 24th I wanted to go out and use and drink. I haven't had that feeling in months, but for whatever reason I did then. I still have that feeling. I have a sponsor and I work the steps and I'm throughly honest with them and when doing the steps, but the desire to still drink is there. I feel like I am a failure right now. It makes me feel worse about myself because these urges have come back. I honestly don't know what to do anymore. I feel like I should just give up and go back to the things that I used to do. People at the meetings talk about me behind my back saying things like; she's whoreing herself around, I'm ruining others sobriety, that I am too young to be an alcoholic, etc... I thought these people truly cared about me, but I guess not. I want to give up so badly right now. I just don't know how much longer I can keep doing this.