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Day and life of a dolphin

Entries in this blog

 

Broken Arm

Saturday evening my son was riding his scooter. He called out for help I had my bedroom window open and heard him yelling I knew something was wrong but I couldnt get to him I was in the bathroom. I called for my husband to go get him. Come to find out him had fallen off his scooter and had broken his arm. My husband yelled through the bedroom window to call 911. His arm was just dangling there from his wrist. You can see where it was broken and just the tissue was holding it together. It was f

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Doggie

I got me a doggie the other day. Just adopted one. She is a great dog. Well behaved and everything. She helps alot with my depression also. I take her for walks everyday. She gives unconditional love and thats what I need. I think everyone needs that from time to time. ^_^

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Hysterectomy

I am having hysterectomy surgery on feb. 4th. Im scared to have it done but its one of those have to surgeries. I have a big fibroid growing in my uterus and it needs to be removed. It is causing me all sorts of pain and problems. I keep telling myself I will be okay but im still scared to have it done because I always think the worst of things that might happen.

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Ranting....

I get home today to a notice on my door saying they are going to raise my rent....ARRRRR!.... The rent is going to be $100 more a month!.....I don't know how I am going to afford that!.... I'm sooooo frustrated!!!!!......I get disabilty and not very much at that......I don't know what im gonna do!....I can't even think right now im so angry but what can ya do..... I just needed to get out some steam. ** I need a really big chill pill**

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Whew!

Whew!...I had the worst panic attack in while....I havent felt this bad since I dont know when....Well, I do have panic attacks but not like this one....I felt like if I was choking and couldnt catch my breath, sweating badly. heart racing, feeling weak... And the list could go on and on....I hate that feeling...I feel so helpless when it just comes on like that.... I feel so bad...I need to be strong for my family....I realize that my family does need me and wants me here.....But I do get thos

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

^-^

I havent wrote in here in a long while. I just have been busy with my family and all. I should write in here more often. I know it would help to get things out that are bothering me. But I just have been keeping them inside for some reason. I have been a little bit down but I think it has to do with the hoildays. We have had some things happen. My mother-in-law had to go in the hospital for an emergency colostomy. She is doing alot better now. At first she wouldnt except the fact she had

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Wearing The Heart Monitor

I got the heart monitor put on today. I have to wear it for 24hrs. I cant wait until I can take it off. I cant take a shower with it on. I love my showers!...Oh, well....Maybe they will find something maybe they wont. If they do then that will explain some things for me. My heart usually acts up alot at night. I hope it will then I can find out whats been going on. My doctor says if they cant find anything they will just contribute it to my anxiety. But we will see.

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Doing Better

I'm doing better now. My doctor raised my zoloft to 100mg instead of 50mg. She also lowered my dosage of ativan to 1mg instead of 2mg. I think that the ativan was making me sleeply. My mood is starting to feel better now. I have the other half of the ativan just incase I need it. Which is always good cause I keep it in my purse. Not the whole bottle of course :tongue: I have been having alot of trouble with my heart acting up lately though. So I need to get that checked out when I go to the GP

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Not So Good.

I havent written here in awhile so I thought Id better. I need to let some of my feelings out that have been bothering me lately. Ever since I came out of the I.O.P ...everything has changed. I think, for the worse. I dont know what happened to me. I was doing fine until about a month ago. I dont know if its the meds or if its just me. I am put on probation with my meds and with keeping mental health appts. Because I took myself off of my meds completely for at least 4 to 5 months and havent

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

I Made It!

Well, I made it through!....Yay!....I was so nervous!...The last thing I remember them doing is wheeling me to the O.R....Then I remember them putting the oxygen mask on me and then the anestesiologist putting some medicene in my IV for me to sleep.....I wake up in the recovery room and the nurse said I did just just fine. I was like its over with? Wow that was quick! LOL!... I am in pain but i'll survive....The Doctor said it was easier than he thought. He just removed what looked like a sack

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

I'm Scared...

Well, its confirmed. I'm going to have surgery on July 31st at 10 am....I'm going to have this Lipoma removed from the back of my right thigh....The Doctor thinks its best because it grew so fast.......Im scared....Im gonna have a drain im my leg for at least two weeks and my leg be sore for months afterwards....But I gotta do it. Not looking forward to it one little bit but i'll just tell myself look on the bright side I can wear shorts again and shirts too!...LOL!

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Cont. Of Feeling Soo Sick..

I went to the doctor this morning and was told I have swollen lymph nodes...I also have really bad allergies... So, the doc. put me on antiboitics and Zyrtec. Hopefully I should feel better in a few days. Yay! cant wait to get back to my old self!

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Feeling Soo Sick...

I have rescently discovered two lumps on the back of my neck. I also have not been feeling very well. I have been very tired and very achy all over. I made an appt. with my doctor on this tuesday. I hope that I can find out what is causing me to feel this way. And to find out what these lumps are on the back of my neck. I just want to feel better physically again. I try to push myself everyday to do things because I dont want my little boy to see me feeling so sick. Maybe I will get my answer t

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Humm...

I am depressed tonight for some strange reason....I just want to be left alone....I know that I have a family to take care of and all but at times it can seem overwhelming.....I think maybe I might need a med increase or something....I dont want to die like I used to. So thats a good thing. I have a conuseler appt. tomorrow so im gonna tell her everything that is bugging me....Maybe that will help me....My in-laws just moved back from Florida a couple of weeks ago....Which is a good thing beca

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Fire In Sc...

Last night around 7pm 9 South Carolina firefighters lost thier lives....They were putting out a fire at a Sofa Super Store and the building collapsed on them they didnt make it out in time..... My prayers go out to all of the families and friends of these brave heroes

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Surgery...

I have to see a general surgeon this friday. I have whats called a Lipoma on the back of my right thigh. I have to have it removed because it will only continue to get bigger. They will give a surgery date friday. I am scared. I have never had surgery before in my life. I know it will be ok and everything but im still nervous.

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Thought Id Shed Some Light....

I havent written in my blog in a while so, I decided to write some today of how I have been doing......My moods have been more stable now since im on 50mg of Zoloft, 75mg of Topamax, 2mg of Ativan, and 100mg of Seroquel.....Yeah, I would say they have been much better since im on some meds now!...LOL!.... I can handle things alot better now than I used to....I am able to go places alot more and got back into shape. I love going walking every evening....I even have my neighbors telling me im loo

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Minding My Own Biz...

I was walking yesterday and just minding my own biz when I heard someone say Fat a**.....I turned around to seee who it was but no one was there......Then I saw in this wooden fence some teenage boys playing in their yard.......I just ignored it and kept on walking it but it did make me angry though......As I got down at the end of my street my son asked me if something was wrong...I said some teenage boys just said something to Mommy that they shouldnt have thats all.......Then I go on with my

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Sorry I Havent Been Around For Awhile

I havent been around for awhile trying to get my life straight.....I have been working on myself and trying to improve things at home to make a better life for me and my family.......So far its going great....I am going walking and losing alot of weight and working on alot of my self-esteem issues that I have been having... I have lost 20lbs.in a month......I do feel much better but I need to lose more though and I am working on that.....I just tell myself in time and I can achieve the things th

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Was Admitted To The Hospital

I haven t been on here for a while because I was Involentalry admitted to the mental hospital on feb. 14th. and just got back home yesterday... I Went in with the instructions of my doctors orders because of sucidial thoughts and have not taken my meds in many months..... I learned alot when I was in there about my self.... IT was a great experince cuz it has opened a whole new world for me....I am slowly recovering at home now and taking a better lookout on life....The world to me was all blac

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Appointment Tomorrow

Well, I have to go to the Mental health doctor tomorrow....I hope it will go well...I am not looking forward to going at all...I am seeing a Bi-polar specialist tomorrow...I think they will want to put me back on meds again....Its not like they took me off of them..I went off them without the doctors permission....I just got fed up with some of the sexual side effects I was havening and some others....I would like to go on one that dosent cause weight gain also...I have lost some weight after go

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Am I?

Im scared...Im sitting here writing this and feel like im going to die...I dont know why I just do....Maybe I need to commit myself or something... I feel as though something is wrong and im going to die...That's what ive always wanted though...But why do I feel so scared?.....I am so confused at the moment...Then there is the other part of me that doesnt want to die....That's where the confusion comes in I cant even finish this im crying too d*** much!

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Never Really Gave It A Thought..

I went to my therapist this morning...She just wanted to see me and talk to me this time without my husband....She asks me does he always come in with you?...I said... Yes he does....She said well do you really feel like you can talk in front of him?..I said yes, I have nothing to hide really...She said well theraphy is really just for you....Its OK for him to come in and sit sometimes but you need to come for you..Which I think she is right... I never really gave it a thought...Its just like w

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

Low

I sit writing this today and im so low today....It was even hard for me to get out of bed today...Well, that's like that everyday...I have been awake most of the night upset and crying...I was thinking of ways to **** myself since im such a pain to everyone and make their lives such hell....I am always doing something wrong....I just dont care anymore about anything...If I go ahead an do it I will be in no more pain and be free....I cant handle my ways of thinking anymore.....Can't go on living

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

 

My Sons Birthday...

Today is my son's birthday!....He will be 9yrs old today!...I can remember like it was yesterday when I was giving birth to him...Seeing that beautiful baby for the very first time...Holding him in my arms...Darn!...Why do they have to grow up so fast!. .....There is a story behind this...I had toxcemia the last two months of my pregnancy...I was on bed rest for the last few months of pregnancy.....They kept him inside as long as they could so he would be a healthy baby....I had to go in a week

dolphingirl

dolphingirl

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