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About this blog

I plan on keeping some sort of journal here, I do this with my Aquariums so I can trace back to see when an issue was most likely to have happened. Since I'm not that more complicated I figured it was worth a go.

Entries in this blog

 

Fight against Cancer

So for a little while now I have been going on about a charity fight. Well the 7th June was the fight and I managed to raise just over £5000.00 for MacMillan Cancer Support (A Charitable Trust close to my heart).  Just now recovering from the match. I received a few injuries 😄 Lacerated Spleen causing small internal bleeding*** being monitored for this currently, also harder to breathe*** Black Eye and Concussion (I was knocked down once in the mach. An amazing Left Hook. Evidence

Ratvan

Ratvan

 

7(ish) Days to go

It's not that ominous do not worry. The fight is in a weeks time. I've been really pushing myself in training lately and have decided that preparation this week will be hydration, healthy eating and lots of rest. I have space in my weight band (might have to down some water to make up the last little bit of weight) so I dont NEED to train. On the other hand at the moment I dont want to train either. So that works out nicely.  I've not been online all that much, for a couple of reasons.

Ratvan

Ratvan

Operation Betta Rescue - Summer Shut Down

Operation Betta Rescue - Summer Shut Down

Well then, it has been a really tough 6 months. Running a rescue out of a flat after moving house was exhausting.  The plumbing drove me insane, literally had to try and fix a blockage or leak every other day,  So attached is a shot of my now empty rack (2019.04.25). I do have some plans for some of these tanks....thinking about it actually I should have one fish left in the blacked out tank in the top.  That is my last "rescue" not really a rescue as the fish was in really good h

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Ratvan

 

Not sure how to feel

Well now, I have been struggling with how to put this into words all afternoon. I had an appointment at my local hospital today. It was for the results of the tests that they have been running for almost 18 months. I have felt numb since the diagnosis. It just seems weird, like it's not happening to me. I feel removed from my body and mind right now.  The Dr. Was very good, gave me my diagnosis and explained to me what this meant in terms of treatments, side effects and gave me a load of in

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Ratvan

 

Fitness Targets

So I thought that I would put up something that I can work towards. There is a charity "event" that is coming up in June, all proceeds go towards St Barnabus Hospice (Respite Care Charity). Before My Mother and Grandparents passed, they were all lucky enough to spend some time in one of these Hospice's. Not to put down the NHS or anythign as they do a great job, but once they were moved into this Hospice they received 24 hour a day care and individual care coordinators, religious members if

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Ratvan

 

The Hard Side of the hobby

I have had a hard few days, I have had to turn down fish that really need help because I am not in a position to take in anymore. I calculated that the current weight of my tanks is over 1.5 metric tons (1750KG when filled), thankfully our house is built on a block and beam concrete floor so I don't need any further reinforcement, in all of this i have perhaps 100 ish Fry, 4 Permanent residents and my rescues (and other animals, reptile and amphibians). Anyway this week for the first time I

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Ratvan

 

Big Changes - Volume 2

Hi All, A quick catch up as I have been a little busy lately. Got a huge batch of rescue fish (approximately 60 or so) at the very beginning of last week. These are approximately 4 weeks old, so they have another 12 weeks before I can tell apart the males from the females, then I will need to decide what to do with these fish. I don't think I have the space for 60 individual containers so need to speak to some fish shops in the area and see if any businesses or anything nearby want a fish t

Ratvan

Ratvan

 

Operation Betta Rescue - Other Fish

These are my latest acquisitions, captured via a police raid on a drug dealers house. Not the exact dish but the species. The RSPCA apparently got my number from a couple of Aquatic stores nearby and provided me with the tanks (thankfully) these tanks will be here at 9am tomorrow. The fish arrive Tuesday. So I have a busy weekend setting up two massive tanks for them. Not what I was planning on doing this weekend but what I have coming I could not say no to.  First photograph is a bree

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Ratvan

 

Practising my Mugshot

Yesterday, oh dear. Yesterday was rough.  Nothing particularly "bad" happened to me, it was just people. People honestly were testing me. I felt tested all day long, I just could not deal with people. I had to bite down HARD on my rage all day. So much so in fact that this morning I feel like I have been at a MMA Competition. My jaw is aching, honestly like someone scored a perfect left hook.  I'm not really sure how I managed to get through it without snapping and going ballistic

Ratvan

Ratvan

 

Operation Betta Rescue - 2 Weeks In

Today is the 2nd week anniversary of my little Charity being "Officially" Open, I have always taken in any fish that I see that is suffering, not just fish but that is where my concentration is currently.  They have been a massive help, they rely on me for everything. Since I've had them I have not had a day where I failed to get out of bed. It has been very stressful however but massively rewarding. So I thought today I would share the little ones that I aim to rehome in the next week or s

Ratvan

Ratvan

 

Confusion, Rage and The Low Lows - Pt 2

So it seems today is one of my down days, nothing particularly triggered this but I have been very easy to annoy. People at work are getting on my nerves lately, everyone knows what I have been through as I am very open about my moods, diagnosis and what has happened to me. And still I still get shit I think it is a general lack of understanding, until you encounter the pain and loss there is nothing really that comes close to this.  I get things like "It's been over a year",

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Ratvan

Took a break from my break

Took a break from my break

I met up with M on Friday as agreed and we had a chat about how we were coping. She looked amazing, not as tired. From what she has been saying shes feeling a lot better and has some job interviews coming up in the next few weeks. She has also been sleeping better (I snore like a donkey being chainsawed in half). We both had a laugh and I know more then anything that I'm still very much in love. Not a long meeting a good couple of hours. So I came back to my empty flat with all my stuff sti

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Ratvan

 

Ah Shite!

Just a quick update for today, so I had bloods taken a little while back as my family have a history of cancers on my maternal side. I went along to the Hospital last night and have been told that I carry the same Genealogy, so I have a lovely little print out that shows my chances of contracting different types of cancer and how much more likely I am to contract it then Joe Bloggs (Jane Doe, A Random etc). I left feeling very confused, so I don't have cancer but I could get it at any time, like

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Ratvan

 

Confusion, Rage and The Low Lows

Hi to whoever is reading this, first things first.  Don't worry , I am fine. These are feelings and not plans. I did not have the greatest day today, since I lost my Mum and her side of the family I reached out to my father to see whether there was a chance, any chance, no matter how small that maybe we could be in each others lives. I have not heard or seen him since I was 7 years old, I am now 33 so a long time has passed.I saw an email in my inbox from him and my heart leapt, I couldn't

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Ratvan

 

Operation Betta Rescue - Meet the Girls

Tea time update, Meet Opal and Lapis So I went out to see the Sorority Tank in action, some people do not understand how to deal with Fighting Fish. Of all the things that can happen most of these will take place in a Sorority Tank. Essentially the tank needs to be full of the strongest female, all of similar ages and sizes. As Betta's are a Matriarchal fish, a pecking order is established. However in a closed environment like an Aquarium there is often not enough room to establish territories a

Ratvan

Ratvan

 

Operation Betta Rescue - Why always Me?

So as some of you may know I love Tropical Fish, especially the Fighting Fish Betta Splendens. I frequently rescue/foster injured/Sick/Young Betta's from a particular Aquatic store near me, they do not allow returns but will post adverts for rehoming. I am well known there and get phone calls and messages from other customers or the shop when they have a fish in need. So this morning while I was at work I got a phone call from said shop that there is someone within the area who has tried to

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Ratvan

 

Going out Part 2 - the reckoning

I probably feel asleep at around 1am last night, not bad for me sometimes its later occasionally its earlier. Anyway about 4am I hear a braying on my door. I get up and answer it and it's a very drunk S and Z. S has lost her keys and cant get in. Z has work in a few hours so cant stay there.  So Z puts S into a spare set of my slobs ( t shirt and pj bottoms) and puts her in my bed. We chat for a bit then Z leaves. S wakes up around about 4 and bolts to the toilet. I hold her hair out the wa

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Ratvan

 

Going out - Not bad, not bad at all

I just got in from a quick evening out, a couple of girls on my floor were going out for the night. Both lovely and I had a nice couple of hours chatting and laughing. Both were dressed up to the nines so was clear that they're out for the whole night. We have S who is like a monkey with a miniature symbol that is powered exponentially. Honestly like 100 words a minute constantly. Hilarious but exhausting. Next is Z, honestly beautiful. I don't know if this happens to you but they smile and

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Ratvan

 

What a night.

I woke up this morning in a very strange place, it took a few minutes to realise where I was and fear and sadness crashed into me with the knowledge that I had moved out. I pushed it aside and got up, used the punch bags around the house, showered and fed Ouro. I've been up and about shopping for bed linens, duvets, pillows, towels, pans and baking trays you know everyday stuff that I didn't have. Met one of my neighbours on my way back in. Apparently the people on the floor have a get toge

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1st Entry - Big Changes.

1st Entry - Big Changes.

Hi all, I plan on making this as realistic and as brutally honest as I can. I need to know how I feel and look back and reflect on this. I'm trying to avoid rose tinting and negativity. Subgetivity is the key. **a prefix. When I get angry or passionate my written language mirrors my spoken language. So if you cant read my dialect please let me know and I'll try and change it. I know we have people whose native language is not english** So tonight is the first night in over 11 years tha

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Ratvan

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