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About this blog

My life has had so many ups and downs. I have followed the road less traveled all my life, meaning my own individual path. This is a blog about those ups and downs and being on the road less traveled. 

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Entries in this blog

You Pi** Me Off

I am tired of getting kicked around. I am tired of being abused. I am tired of people trying to trample on me and take advantage of my good nature. I am done. Just done. The latest is that this recruiter for a job I really want is asking me to do all sorts of work upfront for the company, without getting paid. W T F??? I have done this before as a consultant and was totally burned! She did not hire me, yet used some of my ideas. So I did work for free! Never again will I do this. His suggestions

RiverLight

RiverLight

Yeah, More $$ But is It Worth it?

This job is well.... there's pluses and minuses like any job I suppose. There's good people. I love my boss. They have win.e and be.er hour every other Thursday, summer Fridays where we get to leave early on Fri (half day), and the culture is warm, supportive and inviting. The CEO loves me and I'm doing a great job so far -- all positives right? BUT........ I have to do these freaking long as.s reports each month for every client -- they're seven pages long each. Then I have to do a client

RiverLight

RiverLight

WOW.... Engagement Rings

I came home last night to my boyfriend looking at engagement rings for me  - wow! I know he wants to ask me to marry him, which he tells me all the time, but his divorce isn't exactly finalized yet. He says he cannot wait. He needs to wait 90 days until it is fully over, however. They had the final court date this week. It's been a very long, drawn out and ugly divorce for him, lasting 3-4 years. They separated nearly 4 years ago, he's had another relationship since then, then found me. It's ver

RiverLight

RiverLight

WOW!

The band is on fire!!!! That was one of the best shows I’ve ever seen.. and we have another one tonight!!!! Yipppppeeeeeee!!!! 

RiverLight

RiverLight

WOW, what a NIGHTMARE

Holy crap. Work is SUCH a total nightmare. It's making my life difficult right now. I am away from work at the moment so I finally have a chance to breathe and reflect, but it's simply just ******* me right now.  My manager yelled at me last week. He totally blew up at me unnecessarily and unprovoked. I didn't deserve it, and he eventually apologized after I went to our boss about it, but that sucked. Then my account manager tried to take over the direction of my account, that I am in charg

RiverLight

RiverLight

WOW ~ REALLY???? This just doesn't happen!

So, now on top of everything else that has been going wonderfully in my life, now, after THREE LONG YEARS of looking for a good job, I am getting a full-time job offer! I am STUNNED and blown away! I am SO used to rejections at this stage! One after another after another I faced during those years. The LAST thing I expected after my last round of interviews was an actual job offer. They haven't extended it yet and probably need to check references first, so I don't want to jynx myself, but I thi

RiverLight

RiverLight

Work Woes ~ Reporting Week

It's reporting week at work and then client meetings to review the reports. I am beginning to hate this part of my job. I don't know how long I will stay in this position. Maybe a year at most. I have not learned too much that is new. I am just doing things differently than I have done before. I am also extremely nervous about massive changes I made to three websites -- they have been declining in traffic and revenue for months, and it's partially or mainly up to me to fix. I am dying to kn

RiverLight

RiverLight

Work Anxiety & Nerves

Ugh. I have so much work anxiety right now. I am in charge of getting traffic to two websites. Well, the traffic is down so far this month for both sites; it was down for one of the sites last month, too. I am working directly on many pages of each site and have made many changes at this point. For one of the sites, the decrease in traffic is explainable; we're getting more qualified traffic to the site now, but the terms we're going after have a lower search volume and are more targeted to our

RiverLight

RiverLight

Why Does He Love Me So Much?

I cannot figure this out. He says he loves me soooooo much, and more than anyone he's ever known. I have not been feeling great about myself lately, and I wonder what it is about me that he loves so much. I even asked him. He told me valid reasons, reasons which I cannot even embrace right now in my head. He says I'm the greatest person he's ever known... one of the nicest he's ever known, and one of the sweetest. I know I'm a nice person, and I do sweet things for him, but I suppose also given

RiverLight

RiverLight

Why do bad things always happen to me?

I've been in a toxic work environment for 2.5 years in total. I was laid off a year ago and they hired me back on this past April. I came back to escape a far worse environment that I desperately needed to escape from. So I went from one bad company back to another. Why does this seem to always happen to me? I've had the WORST luck with jobs - over and over and over again, I land in a toxic work environment, with bully bosses and/or bullying co-workers.  Since being hired back on, my former

RiverLight

RiverLight in Employment

Who Cares

Who cares how he feels, what he is thinking, what he doing, how he is reacting, or who he will get involved with. I am done caring. He has infected me with his poison, and I am releasing it. I do not need this, and I do not need him to occupy any of my head space for free. I have given my heart and soul to him, and he stomped on it. He raped and pillaged me mentally and emotionally. He deprived me of a voice. I had no equal voice. F him and the horse he rode in on!!

RiverLight

RiverLight

Where Am I? Finding Me Again...

Where am I? I know who I am and I know where I've been. She's been buried though, that light that shone so brightly once upon a time. Stress has taken hold. Far too much stress going on. I have traveled off the beaten path all of my life. I like that. I am independent yet need social interaction and desire partnership. Sometimes I miss my independent self and wish that things could be different. I recall driving across the countryside not too long ago, all on my own. I packed my car and moved

RiverLight

RiverLight

When the Going Gets Tough...

So, I write on a blog - it does not rank well on Google, which is my job - my field, I mean. I am not a web designer, nor am I a web developer. I am an SEO professional. But I think I TOTALLY suck at my job, even after seven years of so-called "expertise" in the field. The thing is, SEO is really, really freaking HARD. To get a website to rank high on Google for specific terms is a HUGE TASK that takes many, many different tactics and avenues. It doesn't just happen overnight or magically - it t

RiverLight

RiverLight

When Life Gives You Lemons

When life hands you lemons, grab teq uila and salt and call me! When life hands you lemons, throw them at someone! When life hands you lemons, get sugar and water or your lemonade will suck! When life hands you lemons, make apple juice then sit back and let the world wonder how the heck you did it! When life hands you lemons, throw them back and ask for chocolate!!! When life hands you lemons, be grateful they are gluten free! When life hands you lemons, add vod ka! When life hands you lemons, u

RiverLight

RiverLight

What's Up

25 years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination I realized quickly when I knew I should That the world was made up of this brotherhood of man For whatever that means And I cry sometimes when I’m lying in bed Just to get it all out what's in my head And I’m feeling a little peculiar And so I wake in the morning and I step outside And I take a deep breath and I get real high And I scream from the top of my lungs What's going on????

RiverLight

RiverLight

What's New ~ Bored Stiff

I haven't exactly worked in two days -- well three if I count last Friday. My boss is in India and is being completely unresponsive so I have nothing to do but job search. She wants me to leave anyways, I do believe. So I am bored stiff surfing the Internet all day looking for jobs, chatting with friends, emailing friends, reading articles and watching movies. The time ticks by ever so slowly this way. Wish I had a project to work on.... that helps the day go by much more quickly. This is as pai

RiverLight

RiverLight

What IS it about me?

What the hell? I go on a different forum, and yet again, someone finds me and attacks me! I am constantly being attacked and bullied on forums. I'm not talking about DF - I'm talking about a variety of forums I have joined over the last many years. I am SO fed up with it and am wondering what the hell? All I am is myself -- I give advice, I try to help, I am honest yet compassionate. And yet, over and over again, I get targeted and attacked by toxic individuals. Wash, rinse, repeat! Is it me OR

RiverLight

RiverLight

What He Does to Me.... Abuse?

His accusations: I don't like the way you communicate --- when I wanted to go to bed in the middle of a conversation You're unstable --- simply because I confronted him about his behaviors and how they made me feel You take me for granted (twice he's said this) --- simply because I didn't text for a few hours while in transition from a party You feed me all BS;

RiverLight

RiverLight

Weight of the World on my Back

My whole mind and body feel super heavy today, as though I have weights attached to my ankles, a huge boulder on my back and rocks in my brain. Today I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders yet I have an interview to prepare for. I don't know how I'm going to get through it, as I feel I am not going to be my usual upbeat, enthusiastic, focused and high energy self. I almost don't even care. I think I've lost the ability to care anymore. Nothing even matters. Nothing at all. I've put so mu

RiverLight

RiverLight

Weekend To-Do's ... So Much Going On

I have a big to-do list right now. I have to buy snow tires, investigate wedding/honeymoon options, buy a new mattress for the bed, buy my dad a bday present and prepare for a work presentation... all this weekend and next. The honeymoon/wedding planning is actually a fun task and I am very excited to get going on this. I contacted a wedding planning company yesterday. Hopefully they won't charge an arm and a leg for their services, but after researching the options, it would be far easier

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RiverLight

Wedding Plans!

So, we don't know how the wedding will be paid for -- we may need to elope! LOL. I need to ask my parents if they are willing and can help. I could pay for at least a part of it, and so could my fiancee. Together we have some money, and if my parents pitch in, we could probably afford a small family wedding. We've talked about it and only want family there. Our friends won't mingle very well with our conservative families, or rather, my conservative family, so we decided to keep them separate. W

RiverLight

RiverLight

Wedding Dress!

I am going wedding dress shopping with my mother next weekend! I had one picked out, a much more casual dress, but now that I've looked in the shops a little, I may swap it out for something more dressy and elegant! I'm excited!! Here’s the one I’m considering! 

RiverLight

RiverLight

We're Engaged!!!!!!

We did it! We're officially engaged!!! He proposed last night. His proposal was soooooo sweet! I am ridiculously in love and we are both ecstatic. I couldn't have asked for a better man to spend my life with. I am soooo very lucky!!!! ❤️💕💘 WOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

RiverLight

RiverLight

We Tied the Knot!!

We did it!!!! We are now officially husband and wife! What a gorgeous ceremony!!!! It couldn't have been more beautiful or perfect. Now we're enjoying our honeymoon. This place is absolutely spectacular!!!  So here we are, happy happy happy!!!! 💕💝💞    

RiverLight

RiverLight

We Got Our Wedding Rings!

Just back from visiting his parents in Florida, which honestly was a little hard since they're elderly and not well, but we still had a great time. We returned home to find a package containing our wedding rings! We bought them ahead of time, but now we have them. We tried them on and they're both really nice! Now we just need to figure out a wedding!!! We still don't know how we're going to pay for the wedding. It's going to be very small! LOL. Just immediate family. But it will be fun!!! And t

RiverLight

RiverLight

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