• No one should be alone in this. We can help.
If you - or someone you know - are having thoughts about suicide, call 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Calls are connected to a certified crisis center nearest the caller's location. Services are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.                                                                            If you - or someone you know - are having thoughts about suicide, call 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Calls are connected to a certified crisis center nearest the caller's location. Services are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
Advertisement

Main Menu
Sponsored Links
Donate to DF
Latest Forum Topics
No posts were found
Search

Find a Therapist
Powered by Good Therapy
Lindsay  Lindsay

Think of Yourself in the Third Person

Created Dec 6 2011 - 10:55am

I remember reading somewhere that writer Anne Lamott thinks about herself in the third person, to take better care of herself: “I’m sorry, Anne Lamott can’t accept that invitation to speak; she’s finishing a book so needs to keep her schedule clear.”

I find that often, the same trick helps me to be realistic about myself. "Gretchen gets frantic when she's really hungry, so she can't wait too long for dinner." "Gretchen needs some quiet time each day." "Gretchen really feels the cold, so she can't be outside for too long."

Yes, I admit, this approach makes me sound a bit affected and self-important, but the thing is, it really works.

For instance, for the last few weeks, I felt...depleted. Physically, I felt energetic enough, but mentally, I was like a cell phone that couldn't take a charge. I couldn't figure out what to do, but finally I thought of myself in the third person.

As the long holiday weekend approached, I asked myself, "What's the best medicine for Gretchen when she feels drained?" And, when I framed the question about my nature that way, from outside myself, I immediately knew the answer. "Gretchen gets mentally refreshed by doing a lot of reading."

That's what I needed. No writing; hours and hours of reading. A novel I'd never read before, a novel that was long enough to last, a novel that was absorbing without being so demanding that it would just exhaust me more. Fortunately, I had exactly the right book, right on my bedside table. I spent a good part of the holiday weekend reading Neal Stephenson's Reamde. And by the time I finished the book, I felt restored.

Self-knowledge! It seems as though it should be so easy to know yourself, but it's very, very challenging. For me, it's often easier to gain self-insight by using indirect routes—such as asking myself questions like What do I lie about? or Who are my patron saints?—rather than by trying to look at myself directly.

I’m working on my Happiness Project, and you could have one, too! Everyone’s project will look different, but it’s the rare person who can’t benefit. Join in—no need to catch up, just jump in right now.

* Lots of great material on Positively Positive—"your attitude + your choices = your life."

* The holidays are approaching! If you're giving The Happiness Project as a gift (can't resist mentioning: #1 New York Times bestseller), and you'd like a signed bookplate or signature card to include with it, sign up here or email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. . But do it fast! There's not much time.

 

This Month In Pictures
gardenia10.jpg
Members Online
0 Users Online
Guests
Visible
No users online.
Follow Us On Twitter
Like Us On Facebook
Medical News
  • Mimicking deep sleep brain activity improves memory
    It is not surprising that a good night's sleep improves our ability to remember what we learned during the day.
    Sleep / Sleep Disorders / Insomnia News From Medical News Today
    Friday, 27 May 2016 04:00
  • For millions on long-term opioid medications, change will be a challenge
    A team of researchers at the University of Colorado School of Medicine and the VA Eastern Colorado Health Care System recently surveyed patients to understand barriers to reducing the use of...
    Pain / Anesthetics News From Medical News Today
    Friday, 27 May 2016 04:00
  • A new genetic player in autism
    A study aimed at detecting the genetic triggers of autism spectrum disorder has uncovered a new gene mutation, which could lead to better diagnosis and treatment outcomes.
    Autism News From Medical News Today
    Friday, 27 May 2016 01:00
  • What can Pavlov's dogs tell us about drinking?
    Humans aren't much different from other animals. Just like Pavlov's dogs, we can become conditioned to associate environmental cues with rewards.
    Psychology / Psychiatry News From Medical News Today
    Friday, 27 May 2016 01:00
  • How mood and stress reduce lifespan
    The way people respond to stress and mood disorders can shorten lifespan. A thorough piece of research may have pinned down one of the genes responsible.
    Psychology / Psychiatry News From Medical News Today
    Thursday, 26 May 2016 21:00
  • Psychiatric disorders more common among workaholics, study finds
    A new study found symptoms of OCD, ADHD, anxiety, and depression were much more common among adults who met the criteria for workaholism.
    Mental Health News From Medical News Today
    Thursday, 26 May 2016 06:00
  • Neuroscientists illuminate role of autism-linked gene
    A new study from MIT neuroscientists reveals that a gene mutation associated with autism plays a critical role in the formation and maturation of synapses - the connections that allow neurons to...
    Autism News From Medical News Today
    Thursday, 26 May 2016 06:00
  • Multiple personality disorder may be rooted in traumatic experiences
    A new King's College London study supports the notion that multiple personality disorder is rooted in traumatic experiences such as neglect or abuse in childhood, rather than being related to...
    Mental Health News From Medical News Today
    Thursday, 26 May 2016 04:00
  • Two naldemedine Phase III studies show consistent improvement of opioid-induced constipation
    Shionogi has announced positive results from two identically-designed 12 week phase III studies (COMPOSE I and II) demonstrating consistent efficacy and safety of naldemedine in treating...
    Pain / Anesthetics News From Medical News Today
    Thursday, 26 May 2016 01:00
  • ADHD in young adulthood examined in JAMA Psychiatry studies
    Many Young Adults with ADHD Did Not Have Childhood Diagnosis Among a group of young adults with ADHD at age 18, many of them did not meet diagnostic criteria for ADHD at any assessment in...
    ADHD News From Medical News Today
    Wednesday, 18 May 2016 05:00
  • Major new report identifies complex factors and final events that contribute to child suicide risk
    Bereavement, bullying, exams and physical health conditions such as acne and asthma are some of the experiences linked to suicide in children and young people according to a new report by The...
    Mental Health News From Medical News Today
    Wednesday, 25 May 2016 21:00
  • Workaholism tied to psychiatric disorders
    A large national Norwegian study shows that workaholism frequently co-occurs with ADHD, OCD, anxiety, and depression.
    Depression News From Medical News Today
    Wednesday, 25 May 2016 21:00
Suicide Prevention Lifeline
suicidepreventionlifeline.org
Andertoon
Daily Toon Click to enlarge
ANDERTOONS.COM PSYCHIATRY CARTOONSPsychiatry Cartoonsby Andertoons
Tweets by ~Lindsay Reday (@DepressionForum)
Depression Forums - A Depression & Mental Health Community Support Group
Copyright © 2014 The Depression Forums Incorporated - A Depression & Mental Health Social Community Support Group. All rights reserved.
The Depression Forums are intended to enable members to benefit from the experience of other members who have faced similar mental health issues by sharing their experiences.
* DF does NOT vouch for or warrant the accuracy, completeness or usefulness of any posting or the qualifications of any person responding.
Use of the Forums is subject to our Terms Of Service (TOS) and forum guidelines which prohibit advertisements, solicitations or other commercial messages by members, or false, defamatory, abusive, vulgar, or harassing messages and may subject violators to be banned from the forums.
All postings reflect the views of the author but become the property of DepressionForums.org. Your personal information will never be shared with others.
If you have any questions on how it will be used, please see our our privacy policy.
Information supplied on Depression Forums should not be relied upon and is not a substitute for medical advice from a health professional or doctor.
* DF © is an acronym for DepressionForums.org