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I'm Fed Up With My Family :[


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#1 ArchyStone

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Posted 30 December 2006 - 10:50 PM

Right now I was about to go out and have a good time with some friends, but my mom doesn't want to take me out. She wasn't even home all day, she went to a bar and fell asleep at a friends house. She drives around in a car without proper platse (fake ones) and gets by to where she wants to go. For 2 weeks i've been in this room on the computer or laying down pondering my life and the issues I have and how to fix them. I went out maybe 3 times and tonight would of been my 4th. I finally built up the courage to back out and sociallize, but all my mom wants todo is sleep. And she uses the plates as an excuse not to take me, but she'd always use the car to get alcohol and drugs. That was never a problem and of course to go see her boyfriend (ex) , but I can't go out and have fun =/ Nobody out here wants to help me, or maybe I'm just not ready for the help. I don't know much, but I do know this. Not many people have helped me in my life. I feel like going back to the way I was which is only careing about myself because nobody else reallys cares and nobody is gonna help me out. I think I learned that if you really want something in life you gotta do it on your own. I only have 1 more year till I'm 18. I really do plan to move away , change my name and forget about this s***ty life my family has provided. I seriously hate them all and I can't take this crap anymore, the only thing that gets me going is my goal. I really do want to move on from this life and make a new one. I want to create my own family and where my ****ed up family failed I won't......I wish things didn't turn out they way they have :[

#2 Guest_SarahN_*

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Posted 31 December 2006 - 12:22 PM

Hi Archy,

I am sorry your mom is not more understanding towards your needs. I wonder if there is any other way for you to get around, can somebody come and pick you up?

I understand what is is like growing up in a dysfunctional family. I can understand you want to move out asap and do things differently.
It is not easy when you were not raised with feelings such as love and care, it is hard to open up to others and be able to have a relationship yourself.
I wish you good luck and hope you can find your own way in life and live happily ever after :bump:

SN :hearts:

#3 Guest_promethean_*

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Posted 31 December 2006 - 12:23 PM

thats horrible...but dont be mad at your mother...she'll pay for what shes doing...itll come back to her

I feel like going back to the way I was which is only careing about myself because nobody else reallys cares and nobody is gonna help me out.


^^ dont go back to the way your were!...and its not true that no one cares and nobody's gonna help you...its just that maybe youve been hanging out with the wrong people...or maybe they have tried to help you but you didnt let them...i wish you all the best with starting a new life

#4 misfit

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Posted 31 December 2006 - 01:43 PM

I am sorry that your family is this way. I can't imagine what you are going through. It seems that your mom has a lot of problems of her own. As you are 17 you need a mom, and it seems like you have had to be a parent to her instead, that is too much stress to take on for someone your age. You do have the right to be angry with her. Is there anyway you get out without having her drive you? Do you have a friend that could come pick you up ever just so you could get out of the house? I know what it is like to want to get out and not be able to, that drives me nuts. I remember being your age and not having anyone to spend time with, or not being able to go out, it was awful.
I don't know what the answer is to deal with your mom. Maybe there are some people on here that have dealt with parent who is an addict that might be able to help you. I hope so. I am sorry I cannot be more of a help. But it is good that you joined the forums and at least are able to talk to us about this.
Take care hun
Misfit :hearts:
We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves-Buddha

#5 ArchyStone

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Posted 31 December 2006 - 05:48 PM

well turns out my friend did take me out and I went over to my friends house and I had a great time with everyone which I needed. and Tonight I'm going out again, I'm so glad i'm not isolating myself anymore and starting to become more social again. I blew up yesterday writing that and I don't think I mean most of it. I can't desert my family the way my father did. I really do love them to death, but no child should go through what i'm going through. I had to work my a$$ off during the summer paying bills , food, ETC, because my parents sepearted and my dad is a dead beat loser. Anything I say about him is true, he's a god awful person and everything he is I won't be, but I can't run away from these problems. Although my mom has a lot of issues she's still hanging in there and she's going to try to fight her drug habbit sense her parents are in town and are going to help her. I think things will be better this new year, but I really want my dad to pay for everything he's done to tear his family apart and throw all these problems on my lap. It's just not right.

but thanks everyone who has been supportive and I'll of course try and hang in there and keep in touch and help the other members on the board.

I hope everyone has a happy new year and I truely pray we all overcome our issues and reach salvation and triumph over this depression

god bless

thanks once again.

#6 Belle29

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Posted 31 December 2006 - 06:18 PM

well turns out my friend did take me out and I went over to my friends house and I had a great time with everyone which I needed. and Tonight I'm going out again, I'm so glad i'm not isolating myself anymore and starting to become more social again. I blew up yesterday writing that and I don't think I mean most of it. I can't desert my family the way my father did. I really do love them to death, but no child should go through what i'm going through. I had to work my a$$ off during the summer paying bills , food, ETC, because my parents sepearted and my dad is a dead beat loser. Anything I say about him is true, he's a god awful person and everything he is I won't be, but I can't run away from these problems. Although my mom has a lot of issues she's still hanging in there and she's going to try to fight her drug habbit sense her parents are in town and are going to help her. I think things will be better this new year, but I really want my dad to pay for everything he's done to tear his family apart and throw all these problems on my lap. It's just not right.

but thanks everyone who has been supportive and I'll of course try and hang in there and keep in touch and help the other members on the board.

I hope everyone has a happy new year and I truely pray we all overcome our issues and reach salvation and triumph over this depression

god bless

thanks once again.

Hi Archystone,
First I'm very sorry you are going through such a difficult time right now. I really admire you, for supporting your family and facing your problems head on the way you are doing. You are so young to be having to deal with all these things, and I think it's really good, that you have aspirations and goals for yourself and your life. I promise I don't mean to sound condescending, cause you are far ahead of me, but I do remember learning that if I really wanted something I had to make it happen on my own, that no one would do it for me and there was no one going to magically appear and help, that I had to help myself. I'm 29 now but remember all too well being 17, and going through at least some of the things and feeling some of the ways you are describing.
I don't think a change of environment would be such a bad thing when you do turn 18, I moved across town in with my grandparents and it made a world of difference in my life and in my outlook on life. I still talked to my mom and will always love her, but I never regret the change of atmosphere and stability that came with living with my grandparents and later on my own. Well, I'm not trying to give you any firm advice, I'm not very good at that, but want you to know I'm pulling for you and hope the new year does bring positive changes for you and your family. Keep posting and let us know how you are doing. Please take care of yourself, best wishes, Belle xx

#7 Ajumbledmess

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Posted 31 December 2006 - 09:35 PM

I know how family can be. My mother is what you would call over bearing and judgemental. she also likes to play favorites. All of us kids hate it but what can we do. We have told her how we feel and she denies that she does it. I guess what we have all done is learned to keep our distance and that makes us feel better

Posted ImageAjumbledmessPosted Image

"Sometimes we need to hurt in order to grow we must fail in order to know we must lose in order to gain some lessons are learned best through pain."







#8 Guest_SarahN_*

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Posted 01 January 2007 - 07:06 AM

Hi Archy,

I am so glad you did go out and are socializing more, it is so important in life :bump:

Happy New Year to you too,

SN :hearts:

#9 misfit

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Posted 01 January 2007 - 01:31 PM

Hey Archy,
I am glad you are feeling a little better. Sometimes we just need to blow up and vent...then we realize how irrational we felt at the time and almost laugh at ourselves for being so emotional. But it happens, and it is good to get it out of you.
I hope things continue to improve for you,
Misfit
We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves-Buddha

#10 ArchyStone

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Posted 01 January 2007 - 11:28 PM

thanks everyone, my new years went really really well and I had a lot of fun. My mom has been sobar so far so i'm thankful for that. I am opening up more and I've told 2 people so far I'm suffering from depression. I don't know when I'll let my family know and I don't know when I'll want help, but I'll get there or I'll get better. Hopefully get better.

and I hope everyone had a wonderful new years.

#11 violetspike

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Posted 02 January 2007 - 12:01 AM

ArchyStone, as I was reading your posts I just kept thinking, wow, this person seems to know what is going on much more than I did at that age. I didn't let myself think of my problems, just tried to pretend and escape. You are already doing something about yours. I think you will do great things with your attitude and intellect. Its good that you love your family and can see the good side, its also good that you can let yourself be angry and vent when you need to.
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#12 dohta

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Posted 02 January 2007 - 03:09 PM

Hey Archystone, you might know this already but sometimes a mother will have the right intention but uses very inefficient and misleading ways to achieve those proper goals.
Live like a salesman.

#13 ArchyStone

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Posted 04 January 2007 - 07:41 PM

Hey Archystone, you might know this already but sometimes a mother will have the right intention but uses very inefficient and misleading ways to achieve those proper goals.



i didn't realize that till recently, and I'm happy to report she's still clean and hasn't done any illegal substance, but she still drinks, but atleaste it's not drugs anymore and things just seem to be getting brigher. You guys have really been supportive and I can't stress how greatful I am for this site and the members.

#14 smartbeauty

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Posted 17 July 2009 - 02:26 PM

[size="3"]hi everyone..plz do me a favour n help me to solve my major problem..i m a girl n got engaged 1 month ago before dat i didnt know anything abt my fiance's nature but after a month means abt a week ago v started talking to eachother on call n msgs but the prob is dat my family especially my mother n father doesn't allow me to talk wid him actually v belong to an eastern family n they r v narrow minded ...WHAT DO I DO..ME ARE MY FIANCE ARE MADLY IN LOVE WITH EACHOTHER N CANT LIVE WIDOUT EACHOTHER BUT MY PARENTS R THE BIG WALL B/W US :hearts: N COZ OF THAT I M HAVING LITTLE BIT FIGHT B/W ME N MY PARENTS REGULARLY..plz tellme what should i do...i m waiting for ur sincere advices tc :flowers:




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