Posted 15 July 2012 - 05:02 PM
Posted 15 July 2012 - 06:30 PM
I'm pretty positive that almost everyone who goes through a tough decision like this is tormented, but I do know that when you suffer from depression, this seems ten times worse than what they'll ever go through. I bet you suffer whenever you have to make any major decision, right? I know I do-sleepless nights, snippy, and thinking the worst will happen.
Honestly, I've only found one solid solution and that is the classic list of pros and cons written out on a piece of paper. While I do this, I cannot ask any "What ifs", because guess what? As much as you want to control this, much of it is out of your control, except the decision itself. Once you've made it, you have to cope with the what if's or anything that goes wrong OR right. That's just life, isn't it? You didn't have to explain to the new employer that you suffered from depression, and they cannot use that against you in making a decision. Did you do that subconciously to sabatoge the opportunity? That way you wouldn't have to make a decision. Just a thought.
Have you ever read or heard of the book Who Moved My Cheese? by Spencer Johnson MD. It's about dealing with change in your work and your life. Although I've only read bits and pieces, I really need to read the whole thing because I think it would help tremendously.
Best wishes and please let us know what you decide. Best of luck!
Posted 15 July 2012 - 08:50 PM
I do agree with the post above. Since you tend to focus on the negatives, it might help to force yourself to make a list of the good and the bad for each job.
Posted 15 July 2012 - 09:43 PM
The list idea is good. I have made the lists over and over in my head. I should write them down. I do struggle with the what ifs, thats for sure.
This whole situation is really straining my relationship with my wife. She ranges fom supportive to frustrated and irritated. Don't criticize her for that, I'm frustrated with myself also.
Posted 16 July 2012 - 02:39 AM
Congrats on any job at all. It's easy to forget how huge of a blessing that is at all anymore (especially for me being unemployed).
I would definitely look at both companies and see where they've been and where they are going. Look up news stories about each and see if there are any bad signs, like declining revenue, lower stock price, a lot of top execs bailing for work elsewhere (All bad signs). See if you can talk to any current employees at the new company to see what's really going on inside.
Hope that helps. Good luck in your decision.
Posted 16 July 2012 - 10:16 PM
Posted 17 July 2012 - 01:46 PM
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