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[jamiew]

My worst fear that my children, my daughter especially may have the same battle with depression that I have seems to be coming true. I noticed the symptoms in my daughter already, not eating as much, easily agitated, lost interest in the activities she used to enjoy. At the age of 10 she is talking abut how she wishes she were dead and even about ******* herself when she gets mad at me. I have started her in counseling, which she hates that I make her go, but she doesn't have an issue with it once she is there. The counselor and I both agreed that she is too young to start on meds.
I am hoping that starting counseling early enough will help her and keep her from the lifelong battle I have faced.

[Epictetus]

What a good mother you are jamiew! You inspire me! There is evidence of a genetic component to depression. That is unfortunate but not your fault. My grandfather lost his life to depression. I think it is important that you make sure you are not blaming yourself. I mean, of course, consciously you are not blaming yourself. But maybe at some level you might be. You are absolutely not responsible if your daughter has depression. I hope you receive better words than mine on the Forum. Best to you!!! I admire you for the great love you have for your daughter. It is so beautiful to see that.

[leebux]

Dear Jamiew,

Well done on taking action early. Your daughter is too young to make these decisions for herself. She wouldn't be a child if she didn't resist therapy. That is normal. I'm glad you found a therapist that your daughter can relate to.

All you can do is to encourage her to keep in contact with her friends.

As a parent of a depressed teen and a teacher, have you mentioned this to the school? There is nothing to be embarrassed about, and they might be able to keep a careful, yet distant eye on her. Just a thought.

Best wishes to you both. Keep us posted on your progress - both forwards and backwards. It helps to talk to others. It saved my sanity.

Leebux

[Danyellmcc]

I feel the same anxiety about my daughter. She is only 4 but I constantly think that I should have never brought her here to suffer through this. I am now reading a book called "Sorrow's Web" by Anne Sheffield. It's helping me see how the depression works in generational depression and how the depression can effect several generations of a family. Please keep strong and continue to give her the tools to get through this. I am a very TRUE believer that as women our hormones are the culprit to much of our imbalances and she is about the age for puberty. If she can have support for this now, she can grow to be a strong, wonderful, productive woman who will see the signs of her depression and be able to help herself!

[silent_enigma]

I'm having my daughter take the omega-3 fish oil and it's been helping. She's 11. I've dealt with severe depression myself.

[hurtingmom]

I didnt see the signs, my son has depression but til i caught him illegal drug did i realize he had a problem :(
sometimes i feel like a bad mother.

[jeff70]

Depressions sometimes happens to our children, just as it has to us. Feeling guilty is natural, but it isn't justified by the facts, and, most important of all, it's not what our kids need. You'll never really know whether your child's depression has a genetic component. The fact that it's possible doesn't make it so. More important is the benefit our children have: parents who know what to look for, who have a genuine understanding of what they're going through, and who can help guide them through this minefield and teach them who to LIVE with depression. As hard as it can be for us, we owe it to our children, including adult children, to show them that the glass really is half full.

[jamiew]

Thank you for your supportive words.   I know it isn't my fault but it is just heartbreaking to think of all the suffering she may have to go through if she faces a life of major depression.  We stopped counseling for now.  She fought so much against it that I didn't want her resenting it, but I want her to know it's an option if she ever feels like she needs it.  I am also more open about my depression with her and she has started to ask questions about it such as how long have I known that I had depression.  Growing up it just wasn't something I could even bring up to my parents so at least I am glad she is comfortable talking about it with me.