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kebladas

I've Just Given Up... There's No Fight Left In Me Anymore.

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Posted

Hi,

Firstly let me please apologise for bothering anyone with this. I wouldn't usually post anything, but have just become so down that i don't know what to do anymore. I've suffered with depression for the best part of 15 years and i really just can't deal with it anymore. The internet is awash with tales of people who've taken on depression and either beaten it and taken control. I've been to see the Doctor many times in 3 different surgeries, but each time i just get the "here's some pills and we'll put you down for some cbt" and whilst i've really, really tried to to change my mindest and push through all of the things i've learnt, it just seems to fall to pieces at the first sight of trouble. I've tried other therapies, but none of them have seemed to have worked either. I would ask for support from friends and family, but i really don't want to bother them as i know that they all have their own problems and frankly i really don't have any real reason to be depressed. Sure, missing out on an adolescence to care for a terminally ill half sister in the face of an abusive, alcoholic mother wasn't easy, but it wasn't like i was physically abused and doesn't everyone have things in their life that they've come through bigger and better.

I've even had a big change in my life recently. I suffered multiple degree burns to 10% of my body as a result of an accident at home. But whilst this could have been a chance to turn everything around, i've just fallen straight back into the same old routine. I've given up hope of ever beating this thing.... I don't take any pills anymore, they process of taking them just makes me feel even worse, i mean how bad does it sound, no real problems and yet i have to take a small pill to get me through the day. I'm just hoping that i don't get down enough to do something really stupid, but given that i've never acheived naff all in my life i really don't know what i'm going to do anymore.

Many apologies again.

Pete.

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Posted (edited)

I'm sorry, it sounds like you're going through a rough time. I'm here to talk, always, PM me.

Edited by SleepDeprived

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