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Ocd And Extreme Anxiety Has Ruined My Life


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4 replies to this topic

#1 AlexJB

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Posted 21 May 2012 - 01:25 AM

Hello, I'm Alex and I'm 19 soon,

I have suffering from OCD from as far back as I can remember (age 6) and kept it quiet until my 18th birthday, where I just couldn't cope anymore, I got bullied in school and by a lecturer in my college, and at the age of 18 I just needed help, my OCD meant that I couldnt do anything anymore, I just stay in bed upset and crying, lately I have been put on Citalopram 10mg/day and sleeping tablets and feeling a lot better but, the problem is, I have an exam today and I am really not feeling up to it due to missing so much college due to extreme anxiety and OCD over the last year and a half.

It has ruined my life, and my family are totally sick of me and act like there's nothing wrong with me, they do not see what I am going through and they do not seem to care, they are just constantly having a go at me and saying that I'm a waste of space - if only they could live my life for one day and see what I was going through.

Now I'm feeling a lot better and my OCD and Anxiety is under control (sometimes)

My doctor has diagnosed me with moderate depression, extreme anxiety and extreme OCD and I think I also have BDD

but my family still act that theres nothing wrong with me, and feel no sorry for me and are just horrible to me most times, they dont care about me, and this has been making my anxiety go sky high and I've been feeling suicidal for the last year, does anyone else's family act like this towards them? I feel so scared and alone! thanks.

#2 AquaViolet

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Posted 21 May 2012 - 02:11 AM

Hi Alex, and welcome to DF! We are glad to have you here. This is a wonderful community, filled with caring understanding people.
You will receive a lot of emotional support here.
Please know you are not alone. I think a lot of us here can relate to what you are going through.
Personally, I have severe OCD, anxiety/panic disorder, and depression. So I can understand.
Could your doctor give you any literature to show your family about your illness?
Or could someone from your family go see your doctor with you, so the doctor can explain to them about your diagnosis?
You now have us here at DF to add to your support system. We are here for you whenever you need to talk.
Please make yourself feel at home here.
~~AquaViolet~~
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My Diagnoses: Severe OCD, panic disorder, depression
My Current meds: Geodon, Cymbalta, Klonopin, Lyrica 

My Previous meds:
Prozac, Paxil, Celexa,
Lexapro, Luvox, Zoloft, Clomipramine (a horrible med for me),
Xanax, Seroquel, Zyprexa, Risperdal,
Gabapentin (this med did nothing), Buspar (also did nothing)

#3 AlexJB

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Posted 21 May 2012 - 02:21 AM

Hello, thank you for your reply! :)

My mum does come with me to the doctors and has been for the past year, but she still doesn't seem to understand what I am going through, I have been on the emergency list for counselling through the doctor for the past 4 months and have recieved no help so far, I feel like my life is ticking away and the OCD and extreme anxiety has spoilt all of my college years, and I no longer see my friends anymore and do feel very alone, I sometimes feel with my anxiety that everyone hates me and doesn't like me because of my OCD thoughts - I would have a thought where "don't turn over the TV channel or everyone will hate you" etc, etc, etc for everything I want to do in my life, and of course I do face the thoughts and change the channel and I'm so paranoid that everyone will hate me, but now I feel like that's come true because my family just don't seem to care at all?

Thanks again for your reply :)

#4 mef123

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Posted 21 May 2012 - 06:12 AM

I have OCD, social anxiety, agoraphobia, and bipolar disorder. It must be very hard not to have family support. I do have family support, I am lucky. Although I think my husband is getting tired of it. He's going through alot himself, he has cancer and it is very hard on us all. But we love eaxh other and will get through it. It's good that your mom goes with you to the doctor although I would think she would understand more. Your family is probably just in denial.

I hope everything works out and keep posting.

Michele
never give up...

#5 Poison Heart

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Posted 15 June 2012 - 12:36 AM

Sounds like we've been in a similar situation, although I'm older by quite a bit.

Your life is still at an early (yet vital) stage! I hope you realize that.

I would like you to see things as "how have I let anxiety and OCD continue to make me miserable".

There is a lot you can change with changing your thoughts. I am not saying that things could be perfect, but rather that the best thing you can do is to get support to help you recognize how you create your own misery.

As someone with OCD does not always have control over intrusive thoughts, there are ways to acknowledge such thoughts without giving them too much importance. Don't let everything consume you.

I suggest you read up on CBT and, especially, try to find some therapy program (cognitive-behavioural therapy) to guide you in understanding the part you play in making your life what it is right now.

I know it isn't easy to accept, especially at first, but we do play a large part in the quality of our overall existence. I have learned this
more than a decade older than you. You are still very young: use this at your advantage.

All the best
"When you think about it, attention-deficit disorder makes a lot of sense. In this country there isnít a lot worth paying attention to."
- George Carlin




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