Cory, try to keep a cool head with your GF. You have to try to look at her depression as something seperate from your GF. Something that can be brought under control with the right treatment, diet, lifestyle etc. Like Bluesbrother wrote, ultimately, like everyone else, (and if we don't want to be institutionalised) depressives are intelligent people who make their own choices. But also remember, depression can sort of temporarily switch off rational thought when it peaks. I know myself, it's only when I'm on the other side of a peak depressive state that I can then clearly look back and see what a stupid destructive and irrational comment, action or thought I have made. You say she has environmental depression as opposed to genetic/biochemical, this should be highly treatable. At least she can change her environment if worse comes to worse. She should take heart from that fact alone. If Mirt dosn't work there are other meds that might. Amitriptyline might be something for her to consider, although I ultimately disliked it's sedative effects and dry mouth, it did noticably cut down my depression and anger. Kids take it for things like bed wetting, so it's a pretty soft A.D. at low doses. Maybe she could ask her Doc about it? All the best there! :)
That helps me a lot, thank you :) I will suggest she try Amitriptyline; she is to see her pdoc very soon, in a couple of weeks or so.
I think that's what happens to her -- she temporarily switches off, so to speak, and then says and does things that are totally out of character for her. If I'm patient and careful, she usually comes out of it and apologizes for her behavior. She's told me more than once, "if it wasn't for you, I don't know where I'd be." That's enough to keep me around, trust me!
Cory, oh dear sorry to hear it's getting worse. There are a few things I feel worth for you to keep in mind. Firstly, if her condition gets really out of control she will need to go to her pdoc again, and if it's only to help her with her withdrawal. Secondly, make sure YOU don't get drained too much in all this. You can't help either of you once you are burned out. Then, I believe this is also important, she is a grown up person and responsible for her own decisions. It is not right in any way that you get abuse while you are trying to help. She must understand that she has a responsibility also toward you. Depression does not switch off intelligence. Sorry if that sounds harsh but it is important that she understands that. In the end, only she can heal herself. You can only help her in the process, without harming yourself doing so. If she does not appreciate that or if she is not willing to help herself then it's best if you reconsidered the situation. What does she actually want from herself, from you and from life?
Chances are next week will be better, at least the withdrawal symptoms. Still, from what you are saying it seems that she could do with a slight change of attitude toward the people that are trying to help her. How would she react if you told her that?
Thanks for your concern, BB -- perhaps I over-exaggerated the way she is acting. It's not everyday, just the other day she was pretty miserable. For the better part of the week, she was open and affectionate. Then, all of a sudden, she turns into someone else. I know it's just the dual effects of withdrawal and the depression returning. I spoke with her today; she's a little down, but at least she's communicating and being fair. We have a long way to go, for sure, but I know that as I continue to support her, she'll get through this.
She is thankful -- believe me, it'd be hard to stick around if she was just rude all the time. It's not so. I'd say this past week, she was irritable and rude once or twice. The problem is when she is irritable and rude...look out. Also, I'm not the one who bears the brunt of her anger either -- I'd say her co-workers and her family face the consequences more than I do. I guess I just feel it more on a different level.
I appreciate the support, I really do. So thanks for allowing me to clarify a little more.
Blessings to you,
Edited by Cory C, 13 May 2012 - 02:07 PM.