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[Abbyaust]

My lows come at night. I think that the business of my days keep my thoughts off of me.. And as the day winds down my mind also wanders. I typically lay in my bed from 9pm-3am and think about how I wish I could change things in my life.. I wish I could go back and not have done the ridiculous things that I've done. I go back to my past relationship and the abuse.. To all of the things I've quit in my life because I couldn't stick it out.. To comparing myself with my older sister.. And how I really don't have anything anymore.. Just me myself and I..

But I wake up the next day and "act" fine all day until the night rolls around

Does anyone else do this? What keeps you motivated and happy?

[angoisse14]

In the words of Rafiki: "Oh Yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or learn from it."

But in all seriousness, I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. My depression is worse in the morning, as everyone's different. At night I feel at peace, safe under the blanket that is the night sky. Stars have always given me hope. I also keep busy on the computer, play games, etc... When you're stuck in a negative thinking cycle, keeping your mind occupied for long periods of time is a very good solution. :)

Keep us updated. We're here for you :)

--Angoisse

[DesertDog]

Yes, I too feel most depressed at night (and the happiest between morning-noon), and I find that ruminating about the past, present problems, etc. is a big contributor to it. To help fight this I drink chamomile tea to help me relax and distract myself by reading a book, watching a movie, or playing a game until I'm too tired to keep my eyes open. It also helped me to do Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) to fight some of the irrational and negative thoughts that make me feel bad about myself and my life.

[imaman]

I can so relate to this. and would suggest to see your doctor. I have this same feeling. i even quit my job., thinking that it would change , but still at night I get the same negative thoughts. Yes, my job put alot of strain on me, but I don't think it was the cause. I waited too long to make an appointment to get help. Finally did, and suggest you should make one soon , if you haven't yet. Best wishes.

[Abbyaust]

Thanks everyone. It's nice to have this for support. I will try some of those techniques. :)

[DreamAgain]

I can so relate to this. and would suggest to see your doctor. I have this same feeling. i even quit my job., thinking that it would change , but still at night I get the same negative thoughts. Yes, my job put alot of strain on me, but I don't think it was the cause. I waited too long to make an appointment to get help. Finally did, and suggest you should make one soon , if you haven't yet. Best wishes.

I agree. I also worked for years and never sought help...After 35 years I lost my job and deep depression and anxiety set in. My worst time is night when I am alone in my thoughts....I try the "mental judo" that my psychologist gives me to distract myself from my negative thinking but it doesn't work that great at night. These days I obsess mostly about my horrible doctor... I believe in doctors and medication but I need a new doctor and I need to talk to someone who isn't just prescribing me the next medicine on the list without any thought as to the type of depression I have.