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[Spiritual_Wanderer]

Does anyone else feel this? Any time I eat until I feel full, I feel shame. I feel guilty like I ate too much. :(

[bathory_metal]

I know how you feel :( I used to experience this, but have adjusted to eating smaller healthy meals more frequently (approx every 3 hours) to prevent overeating and I've found It works :)

Good luck!

[DarkRain]

I used to feel like that when I was in high school. If it's healthy food I made for myself I usually don't feel as bad versus when eating microwave/junkfood.

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

That's true. I never feel guilty when full after eating a big salad. It's always something fattening or loads of calories, sugar, etc.

[DarkRain]

That's true. I never feel guilty when full after eating a big salad. It's always something fattening or loads of calories, sugar, etc.

I've tried pretty hard to eliminate those sorts of foods from my shopping list. It isn't always easy because my mom will still buy chips and crackers and I still buy sugary juice drinks or mini sodas. I try though. If you ever need meal ideas I have tons, so feel free to pm me. I've been scouring cookbooks and piling up recipes ever since I went veggie.

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

Here we go again... I so hate myself right now. I feel so powerless to control my eating... I chose the fatty food over a more healthy option. Again.

Sad.

[Helium]

Does anyone else feel this? Any time I eat until I feel full, I feel shame. I feel guilty like I ate too much. :(

Ditto.

[lindahurt]

Here we go again... I so hate myself right now. I feel so powerless to control my eating... I chose the fatty food over a more healthy option. Again.

Sad.

I am so sorry you are having a hard time but hope things will get better for you. When the cares of life ovewhelm you with emotions a tendency to eat foods high in calories for comfort is common for many of us. But you cannot beat yourself up over it. Just take it day by day and start anew.



Lindahurt

Edited by lindahurt, 19 September 2011 - 01:57 PM.

[LifeAtZen]

Here we go again... I so hate myself right now. I feel so powerless to control my eating... I chose the fatty food over a more healthy option. Again.

Sad.

What kind of fat was it? Contrary to popular belief, fat is very good for you. Fat as in coconut and olive oil, butter, lard, tallow, ghee, and palm are necessary for healthy living.
Vegetable oils, especially corn, canola, and soybean, are harmful and grains/sugar will damage your cells more than fat ever will.

So, do not fret, eat more fat!

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

Here we go again... I so hate myself right now. I feel so powerless to control my eating... I chose the fatty food over a more healthy option. Again.

Sad.

What kind of fat was it? Contrary to popular belief, fat is very good for you. Fat as in coconut and olive oil, butter, lard, tallow, ghee, and palm are necessary for healthy living.
Vegetable oils, especially corn, canola, and soybean, are harmful and grains/sugar will damage your cells more than fat ever will.

So, do not fret, eat more fat!

I completely agree with you and am very familiar with these ideas. Unfortunately, I have trouble living it and manifesting it in my life. It was

Spoiler

"French Dip" (beef- not the good kind) and french fries. I'm sure they use corn or vegetable oil. And I eat a lot of sugar. And wheat. :(

I agree with what you say, though. Coconut oil is highly underrated. And I think butter has gotten a bad rap over the years as well.

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

I am so sorry you are having a hard time but hope things will get better for you. When the cares of life ovewhelm you with emotions a tendency to eat foods high in calories for comfort is common for many of us. But you cannot beat yourself up over it. Just take it day by day and start anew.



Lindahurt

Thank you! Your support means a lot.

[LifeAtZen]

Here we go again... I so hate myself right now. I feel so powerless to control my eating... I chose the fatty food over a more healthy option. Again.

Sad.

What kind of fat was it? Contrary to popular belief, fat is very good for you. Fat as in coconut and olive oil, butter, lard, tallow, ghee, and palm are necessary for healthy living.
Vegetable oils, especially corn, canola, and soybean, are harmful and grains/sugar will damage your cells more than fat ever will.

So, do not fret, eat more fat!

I completely agree with you and am very familiar with these ideas. Unfortunately, I have trouble living it and manifesting it in my life. It was

Spoiler

"French Dip" (beef- not the good kind) and french fries. I'm sure they use corn or vegetable oil. And I eat a lot of sugar. And wheat. :(

I agree with what you say, though. Coconut oil is highly underrated. And I think butter has gotten a bad rap over the years as well.

Here is something: do we choose these foods, we know are bad for us, to illicit these feelings within us--causing a self-defeating cycle? Is this a way of self-punishing?

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

Good question. I tend to have an addictive personality (with food, drugs, alcohol) so I think part of it is an addiction to sugar, bread, fatty fried foods. I have never thought, oh I'm depressed, let me go eat something. It could be a self-sabotaging thing, or some ties to fear of rejection... I'm not quite sure. There's definitely some kind of underlying issue going on. Self punishing... sounds possible.

[nocturneangel]

I understand that a lot. When I'm depressed, I usually don't feel like eating at all and when I feel better, I get addicted easily. Then I feel guilty for eating too much, which leads to depression and self-punishing by not eating. Bad vicious circle. Being a vegetarian helps a bit, though sometimes I wish sweets and fast foods were all non-veggie...

[lostingothicmusic]

I do know exactly how you feel. I always have to finish eating before I feel full or I feel totally disgusting for the rest of the day. I can't even let my husband touch me because I feel so gross. It's even worse if it was something like a 'treat' because I then feel completely unworthy of anything. You're definately not alone in that feeling. xx

[Helium]

Does anyone else feel this? Any time I eat until I feel full, I feel shame. I feel guilty like I ate too much. :(

Same here, plus add the fact that I HATE how my butt looks like. It´s big and gross....

[celtic79]

Hi there folks,



I'm new here to the forum. Just wanted to say you are not alone. I used to have a bad eating disorder about 10 years ago but I slowly but surely overcame it. I do remember that pattern of disordered eating than feeling so guilty. It can be a hard load to bear! As a male I was able to fool a lot of people as they think it can't happen to males. But just remember the problem is Not with you but with the disorder, the disease itself. You are a healthy, normal person totally worthy off feeling and being loved. Probably more people think about you and care about you than you will ever know. A lot of times with body image we project onto others and worry about what they'll think of us but the problem really begins with us, in our own disrupted thought process. You only live once and everyone deserves to feel comfortable in their own skin. Because we're all different, physically and mentally. No two people are alike nor should we be. I've come to embrace my little imperfections. They are part of what makes you you. You can be stronger than you even think and you can beat this. I'm living proof that these things can be overcame. Might I also suggest if you're having major trouble overcoming these thoughts of self loathing an SSRI such as Prozac? I've been on it a couple months now for depression and some OCD symptoms that have lingered since my eating disorder and it's really helped establish some balance in my life and thoughts. Whatever you do though just don't give up and don't give in, you might be surprised that you Can be stronger than this disorder and you can beat it! Hope this helps someone. No matter how low you get just remember, there is an answer and something Can be done :) This won't last forever. God Bless.

[AlwaysAnna]

i mite not be a expert on eating disorders or suffer from one but i can tell you this:iv felt shamful for many other "regreats" iv done in the past. when i look back i think tho, do i realy regret this? how much diffrence would it make had i not done it? just something to think about. :)

[rin]

Yes, all the time. I just want the food in my stomach to go away :(

[nessa11]

In a way I feel the same thing. For me I feel guilty because I tend to emotionally eat to distract myself from things that are important...

Moving away from that is something that I'm slowly working on. Fortunately day by day I'm getting better at just living my life rather than focusing on eating or not eating.

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

I am just so disgusted with myself lately. I can't stop binging at night (and this is after drinking). It makes me hungry and then I eat and eat. But I can't stop (drinking) which triggers my appetite. It's so horrible... why do people have to struggle with these things? I feel so bad for all of us - and myself. I wish I could control it. I feel very powerless right now. Just had to get that out.

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

Well, I have decided not to bring certain foods in the house (like ice cream). I also am buying more veggies/fruits and trying to eat more protein/meats and try to cut down the bread and heavy carbs... I hope by not bringing certain foods in, it will help me. Ice cream is a big weakness for me.

[peachesmary6]

I get physically ill if I eat enough to feel full. I can't ever fell full,

[swimfan93]

I hate feeling full. I always feel so bloated and uncomfortable. I used to punish myself by eating lots and lots (usually low calorie foods) until I was so full and bloated. I used to do a lot of self-injury, and I think this was sort of a method. Being extremely full and bloated made me feel horrible, so it worked as a way to hurt myself.
Did anyone else ever do this?

[LibraryLady]

Gosh, I feel so much like the rest of you! I feel guilty and shamed when I put ANY food in my mouth! I hate feeling too full, that bloated feeling is so uncomfortable.

I too am trying not to buy binge-worthy foods. When I start to pick them up at the grocery I ask myself "who do you think is going to eat that?" You see, I live alone! What do I think, that the gremlins in my house are going to eat those no-no items? HaHa! Then, for a while I'd tell myself I was buying whatever for my boyfriend. Well, I caught onto that trick right away. Those foods never lasted long enough for my boyfriend to come over and eat them! So, I'm not falling for that anymore! It is really amazing the crazy rationalizations I can come up with to buy no-no food! LOL!

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

I have been thinking about how much eating issues have to do with inner pain, depression, anxiety, and probably even certain genetic predispositions to addiction. It seems so clearly to be an emotional, psychological thing, yet the irony is, it manifests outside. People think you should just "get off your lazy you-know-what" and exercise, stop eating that much, etc. If it were that easy, no one would be overweight.

I want to start trying to search inward, try to find out why I do this. It seems to be an act of self-hatred, punishment? So why do I do it? Why do I hate myself? It's almost like a spiritual thing to me. There's something in there, deep. I want to figure it out, so I can forgive myself and get out of this cycle. I just am caught between wondering if I could heal the inner pain on my own or if it is truly like an addiction, where I would need to always be in recovery for the rest of my life, go to groups, etc. If this is true, there would be certain things you could NEVER eat again, because, like alcohol, it could trigger you into a "relapse."

?

[ghettomd]

omg i feel that every night after i try to have dinner. omigod they are making me do it otherwise i will be forced to take a health leave from school and all my dreams will go out the window and i will be ****ed, in my dad's very words. i just feel like im constantly failing.
i eat and try to eat more than i did last week, like for 3 days now i have added a whole can of green beans to my dinner and it feels like i am eating the world. i almost feel like my stomach is going to explode after i eat, i am so full and bloated and feel utterly disgusted with myself. i cant help it though!!! and then the mania starts, running through the numbers in my head of how much, how much x vs y weighed, what they mean to my body, omigod its like its inside every thing i think about now. i am trapped!!

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

Well, I gain and gain and yet I still do nothing about it. I stuggle with drinking, but this is another bad area for me. I feel powerless, and I hate myself for this. I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror. Every time I eat, I feel like I've done something wrong, yet I still do it. I eat too much, I hate myself for it, yet I can't stop, apparently. Sometimes I get so angry at God (or whoever is out there, if anyone is). Why did I get these flaws and burdens to bear and why can't I take control of my life and end the cycle?

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

Well, I haven't binged all week and I haven't drank a lick of alcohol. Maybe things are finally changing! :)

[Trace]

Well, I haven't binged all week and I haven't drank a lick of alcohol. Maybe things are finally changing! :)

Hi SW

You really are doing very well. Congrats and well done!

Trace

[Handon Frypan]

All I've had this morning is an Algerian tangerine. Nothing to worry about in reality, but I do feel like food is my enemy. If I consume ANY food, SOMETHING will go wrong. But yet, I'm always thinking about food, which often leads to my unnecessarily eating it.

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

Sometimes I'll think about food, but mainly it's if I have been drinking, and say, I know there's leftover pizza in the fridge or something, I'll think about how I'm going to eat it later. There's nothing essentially wrong with that, it's just that it isn't in moderation.

I don't really think of food as an enemy. I think of myself and my weakness/lack of control as the enemy.

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

I've been making some little changes... taking walks, getting a bit of exercise. There is this audiobook called "Course in Weight Loss" by Marianne Williamson that I just can't recommend enough. It has helped me so much. Just listening to it comforts and motivates me.

But I still have such a long way to go. I was doing good with foods and eating, then I made homemade pizza over the weekend and kept eating for days until it was all gone. And so I felt horrible. Then last night the same type of thing happened. So I feel pretty bad today.

Night eating is my trigger and main weakness. I am alone and no one sees me, so I am free to overeat. If I had a roommate or partner, I know for a fact that I would not do this. I have to remove myself from this cycle. I do have hope. I am not going to just stop doing the things I have started to do (like walk and cut out calories here and there, no sugar in coffee or tea, etc.).

[TruePal]

I feel this too. Its really a mind game you play with yourself because like some of you guys have mentioned, usually after eating a relatively healthy meal I feel satisfied and unashamed. But if its a bag of chips, ice cream, pizza, etc that I'm consuming, I feel like a fat pig and start mentally beating myself up afterwards. Its a vicious cycle.

[LilyRain]

I'll often feel guilty and fat when I eat. :( Changing what I eat helps, I've been trying to eat healthier. I don't keep cookies or snacks in the house as to not tempt me. I decided if I want a cookie that badly, I can go bake some. I eat ok... I definitely eat fast food (tonight for instance), I do believe in moderation but I always feel that chub on my middle that makes me feel really badly about myself.

The best thing I can say is to take baby steps... do a little at a time. If you try to do too much at once, then it'll be hard to keep up the healthy habits.

SW, is there something you can do that when you get your night eating trigger? Like, say, instead of eating you go for a walk or drink a tall glass of water? That might help?

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

For me, the only sure fire way is to go to sleep when my daughter does (around 8:30-9). I know that can change when I beat this awful habit. I try not to bring triggers into the house. Drinking brings on cravings. The two are entertwined. I have been doing better and some of my clothes even feel a bit loose, so there is improvement. I try to eat more salads and walk. Not that salads are all I eat or could eat, but I try to have a meal a day or every other of some type of salad/greens.

[Gem277]

I'm also a vegetarian and that helps, but I also use MyFitnessPal which helps me keep track of how many nutrients I'm getting.

Because of the whole feeling ashamed to feel full thing I avoid hot foods by cooling them off in the fridge before eating them. I also stick with my safe meals and avoid things I KNOW at this point will set me off. It's difficult, but after 15+ years I think I've got it down to a science now lol. Mainly eating small meals is a good thing. If I binge every now and then I still have trouble withholding meals or overexercising to make up for it, but I'm always aware and working on things.

SW I have a problem with night snacking as well...check out the program above. If you get down to a certain amount of calories left it helps deter extra snacking. Good for you going on walks! That's a great way to be healthy!

[Spiritual_Wanderer]

I over ate and drank tonight. :( I feel so horrible. I just want this to end... the addiction...Nothing seems to help. I listen to self help positive books on CD, I have scripture taped to my window to read when I feel discouraged...I do some good things, but I inevitably fall prey to my triggers... :(( I'm so sad and disgusted right now...

[lostingothicmusic]

You need to hear this: You're beautiful!

What really matters is what you say and do for other people, not how you perceive yourself on the outside. Food is not comfort (although it can seem to be) or an enemy (though to me it definately can seem that way); food is nourishment. This is just a millimeter backwards in the road of life. You do know what to do next. You go back to the books, the CDs, the scripture and everything else that made you stay away last time.

YOU CAN DO IT and we're with you all the way...

[Tiggerluvr]

I feel very guilty if I eat until I am full. This has been recent for me, within the past 6 months or so. I don't want to eat much, because then I will take away from others (husband and daughters). What if they are hungry for a meal and I ate all the food?

I know it sounds silly, its just how I feel. Perhaps something else I need to take up with my Dr. :(