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Positivity Thread: 3 Things That Went "right" Today, Edition #7.


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#361 LonelyHiker

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Posted 04 November 2011 - 09:13 PM

Considering how absolutely god-awful miserable I've been feeling the last couple of days, I was able to sift a few pieces of quartz out of the steaming pile of crap:

Thursday November 3

1. Applied for a new job (they keep cutting hours at my current one)

2. Spent a nice afternoon with my son.

3. Started a blog here on DF (first blog ever for me)

Friday November 4

1. Had a long phone convo with my good friend and "partner in divorce" in DE. I was feeling like absolute crap, and the talk really lifted my spirits.

2. Got some errands done.

3. Took my son to see A Year With Frog and Toad at our local professional theatre. It was his first live stage show, and was a bit apprehensive, as he's only four, but he loved it!
You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf. - Jon Kabat-Zinn

One day at a time, one step at a time, keep rolling that stone. - Me

Normal is someone you don't know very well. - Anonymous

My diagnoses: Dysthymia, MDD
My current meds: Paxil, 40mg Tegretol, 700mg
My previous meds: Serzone, Prozac, Lexipro, Effexor, Cymbalta

#362 sober4life

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Posted 04 November 2011 - 10:17 PM

My internet works again.

I stayed sober all day.

I talked to my brother on the phone and it made me feel good when he said I sounded better.

#363 lindahurt

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Posted 04 November 2011 - 10:26 PM

My internet works again.

I stayed sober all day.

I talked to my brother on the phone and it made me feel good when he said I sounded better.


Great news soberlife!! I am glad you stayed sober today.
Lindahurt

Edited by lindahurt, 04 November 2011 - 10:27 PM.

Even in the most horrific of situations, one's attitude has an enormous role in shaping what happens ~ Viktor Frankl
In you lies the power to choose, to commit - Stephen Convey

 
The kind of person you want to become is greatly influence by your inner decisions, and not from outside influence alone. We can even under adverse circumstances, decide what shall become of us ~ Brian C. Stiller



Posted Image
 

#364 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 05 November 2011 - 12:59 AM

Ooops I have some additions, and my old post won't allow me to edit!

Addendum to Blackout #2 of 2011, Catching up...Sunday October 30-2011:

add #10: In the afternoon, connected with Spring Hill neighbor Lisa, who said that power went out there at 4PM Saturday afternoon (I am again grateful to have kept mine until early Sunday one am). Good to have the connection with Lisa.

add #11: In one of my many calls to CL&P, I was reassured that there shouldn't be a problem with frozen pipes; that it only occurs when temps go below freezing for an entire 24 hours.

addendum to #4: People I tried for snow clearing help included former asst. James, stand-by Brian, Jeff and Sheila, Pam. Also alerted Karen to possible postponement of Monday massage due to inaccessible driveway.

Edited by PeacePilgrim, 05 November 2011 - 12:59 AM.

Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#365 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 06 November 2011 - 09:49 AM

Saturday November 5-2011 (asterisks represent the best of the day!!!):

1. Thank goodness, I bolted awake at 8am, with just an hour to spare before arrival of ServiceMaster water cleanup team. In spite of queasy stomach, got several spoonfuls of yogurt into me. Took camera, credit card, a few misc papers and tools and headed for basement, where I waited in easy chair. Felt good to open the screen door to sliders, to welcome the fresh air and bird song outside (heat had been at 75 degrees overnight to help dry out).

2. *Diane and Chris arrived shortly past 9am, on schedule, and worked about an hour. Very impressed with both their friendliness and professionalism. Diane used moisture meter to test both the floor and the walls. Set up one very powerful and quiet dehumidifier, and 3 large fans (one blowing under the carpet, one aimed at bathroom, one in furnace room). I made the choice to have soaked carpet pad removed and discarded rather than risk mold (Chris said pad was only helpful for insulation and comfort underfoot). I shared re my OCD issues and that went pretty well, although I had to "endure" the ripping away of taped carpet pad from wooden perimeter pieces around baseboard area. Asked permission to take photos of operation for insurance documentation. NOTE: must remember to ask re removal of rust stains.

3. Talked to Michael at length on phone sometime around noontime/one pm. He has power back, although his mother does not. Discussed that one online article that speaks to me most strongly re achieving real goal in getting past depression: goal of alleviating suffering rather than ending life. Also discussed the fact that I will probably have freezer spoilage at West Hartford, due to fact that a week later, my power there is still out. I printed out ongoing power outages and am amazed how many places still have more than 50% power out. Makes me feel luckier than ever to have power back, both here at Wormwood and at parents' house.

4. Actually had an online sale today from my clutter website!!! I phoned the woman to let her know that I was having some internet difficulties and it might be a couple days before I could complete sale.

5. **Best moment of the day: Brooke at the door with Pizza in hand around 4pm. Although it was definitely a break with my raw diet, it was most welcome, and Brooke had made a special exception to get me a medium pizza w/3 toppings at reasonable cost. (I had explained re being disabled and having been "stood up" with Brian's food delivery following losing food in fridge in power outage.) I was at long last finally really hungry, and devoured 2/3s of it in one sitting, and then the rest later late night. Food is not only about physical nourishment, but the nourishment of the soul from the kindness of the person delivering it.
PS Later sampled Blue Mountain's raw coffee ice cream for the first time!

6. After pizza supper, took to bed and watched 4 episodes of new Laura Dern tv series "Enlightened" on HBO on demand. Fit my mood perfectly.

7. Curt phoned 6:20pm to indicate that raw class is canceled for Sunday, due to continuing power et al disruptions. Added bonus: Now I have Curt's cell number, which I didn't have before.

8. Just before midnight, had sudden inspiration to order "The Box" (of raw food meals) from Rawvolution just before their Saturday midnight deadline. It should help me get back from my pizza detour to a full raw diet.

9. Late night email note of apology from Brian for lack of communication today. I think maybe we can work it out.
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#366 Rainbowglow

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Posted 06 November 2011 - 10:14 AM

--bright sunshine is wonderful!

--I got a walk in the fresh air.

--Thank goodness my power is back after long cold outage.

#367 hocico

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Posted 06 November 2011 - 05:15 PM

- I got to hold my baby nephew loads and took him to feed the ducks for the first time ever .
- My wife was happy all day and we had cuddles.
- I enjoyed watching the history channel with my dad.
Do not wait for extraordinary circumstances to do good; try to use ordinary situations. - Jean Paul Richter
Democracy no longer works for the poor if politicians treat them as a separate race - Frank Field

#368 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 06 November 2011 - 08:03 PM

From Blackout #2 of 2011, Storm Alfred, Catching up.... Monday October 31-2011:
What a crazy day! Nightmarish even. Power outage and cold continuing, and things went from bad to worse (including losing landline phone service), but here are some positives.....

1. Lisa phoned 8:10am this morning to announce that power at Spring Hill had been restored earlier, around 3am Monday morning. We expressed mutual gratitude that my 2 tall towering fir trees had been taken down just in time prior to this storm.

2. Sue came to my rescue from 11:33am to 1:27pm, helping me pack up and rescue food from my failed Wormwood refrigerator and move it to Spring Hill.

3. Best place to be today was sitting in my car in driveway, feeling the solar heat from the sun and having my cell phone plugged into car cigarette lighter.

4. While in the car, Loretta called (she had been away) and we quickly set up a 1/2 hour phone appointment then and there on-the-spot. We discussed places I could go to get away from the dark and cold, including 24-hour Walmart and Store 24, Starbucks, Community Center shelter (but I feared it would make me more depressed--unless they had been running some 12-step groups where I could be my "genuine" me), my parents' house at Spring Hill.

5. Afterwards, I phoned Jasmine to firm up her bringing me extra water jugs and a bag of ice. At the time, it was a good positive thing!

6. When the delivery of ice/water turned really sour--and ALL my phones failed me at the same time (along with contact phone numbers in my cell phone address book), at least I had somewhere to flee to (late parents' house at Spring Hill), where I plugged in my cell phone and problem-solved to restore address book/contacts with help of friendly Verizon customer service. I then phoned PA Warmline (woman named Dena??? whom I had not talked to before) and through dizziness and anxiety attack, kept talking until I calmed down a bit. I then just sat there in the welcome heat, with the cell phone charging, until finally I decided I needed to go home to Wormwood and crawl under the covers again. I was at Spring Hill approximately 6:30 to 9 pm. Before I left, I discovered a pair of heavy work gloves of Dad's which will work great for handling dry ice when raw ice cream delivery comes this week. I turned on outside dusk-to-dawn lights to guide me as I left.

7. In spite of the feelings of being cut off and of even being verbally attacked by Jasmine's husband, I did NOT cave to the desire to order Domino's pizza for supper at Spring Hill. Instead, I had one of the yogurts that Sue had earlier placed in my Mom's small fridge.

8. When I fled from Wormwood in the face of anxiety attack, I was really smart in what I grabbed to take with me: I wore my night clothes, but threw on outer wear and grabbed credit card, driver's license, flashlight, cell phones (both contract and prepaid Verizon), Verizon notes, and at the last moment, my "food bag", which also contained my anti-anxiety meds.

9. Also in the midst of my Wormwood melt-down, I was able to stay mentally sharp enough to call 411 directory service and obtain Pam's home phone number. Left an emotionally "messy" message there, which I later asked Pam if she would erase before other family members heard it. I am still impressed that I stayed focused enough to obtain that one "lifeline" number before all phones failed.

Edited by PeacePilgrim, 06 November 2011 - 09:02 PM.

Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#369 sober4life

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Posted 06 November 2011 - 11:54 PM

I got some exercise. I like going for walks because I can think without anyone bothering me.

I stayed sober.

I was able to deal with old friends in a positive way.

#370 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 07 November 2011 - 03:10 PM

Sunday November 6-2011 (asterisks represent the best of the day):
1. Brian eventually delivered my food supplies, and communication was better than yesterday--even though it still took longer than anticipated (his truck broke down en route). He worked from 2:20pm to 4:40pm, also bringing me mail and tossing out wilted produce from the fridge for the animals.

***2. Pam unexpectedly phoned around 3:15pm and we talked for 23 minutes. She never phones on the weekend, so it was a real pleasant surprise! I said that I would send her this meaningful article about alternatives to ending life.

3. Kristin called, and we set up a tentative Wednesday date for me to pick up herb crackers and raw hummus, and to learn how to use Horum juicer at same time.

4. With my fresh food supplies, I surprised myself by making an experimental "carrot cake" blender smoothie (with bananas, carrots, cinnamon, dates and almond milk). It was nice and spicy, but I ate it more as a soup than a drink. I enjoyed it with the gluten-free crackers Brian had purchased, spread with hummus, and carrot juice as beverage on the side.

5. By 10pm, I was calm and centered enough to enjoy "Pan Am" tv episode, with an especially touching conclusion to a romantic relationship on the show.
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#371 sober4life

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Posted 07 November 2011 - 09:00 PM

I ate at Taco Bell which I love.

I walked 2 miles.

I stayed sober.

#372 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 08 November 2011 - 04:05 AM

Monday November 7-2011:
1. Allowed myself to sleep in til noontime without bothering to listen to voicemail, which could have disrupted sleep. (Turns out there was only one voicemail, from insurance adjuster.) Sent an early morning email to Diane at ServiceMasters to let her know that I was not available today.

2. Positive email exchange with Pam, who "proofed" my Eric "loose ends" email, and encouraged me to go to Raw Food Central on Wednesday.

3. Diane was real nice and understanding on the phone when I called to postpone Servicemaster date to tomorrow Tuesday. She said she would bring a claw/crowbar to remove wood pieces running around perimeter of room.

4. Talked to insurance adjuster, who was pleasant enough on the phone.

5. Phoned in prescription to Walmart so that Sue can pick up tomorrow.

***6. Michael phoned from his cell phone around 6:30pm from my house in West Hartford, and we talked for 8 minutes. I was astounded that he was there, and, amazingly, he told me that the power was back on there!!! Big surprise, because CL&P minutes before indicated that it was still out until midnight tonight. Good news all round: Michael found no wetness in basement, furnace was up and running, and he cleaned frozen dinners/ice cream out of freezer--since they had probably spoiled. Also, he saw no damage in yard from fallen branches, etc.

7. Actually managed to focus enough to enjoy Dancing with the Stars tonight, and afterwards watched "Once Upon a Time" tv series "on demand".
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#373 LonelyHiker

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Posted 08 November 2011 - 05:33 PM

OK, catching up:

Saturday November 5

1. Took my son to a train day festival in Ashland. He loved it.

2. Finished reading the play I was assigned in acting class.

3. Exchanged more emails with my long "not-so-lost" friend in Chicago.

Sunday November 6

1. Me and the boy were total couch potatoes in the AM, watched classic Bugs, Daffy, Tas, etc. until noon.

2. Cleaned the house.

3. Started memorizing lines for the scene I was assigned in class.

Monday November 7

1. Had a good day back at work, after an unplanned four day absence.

2. Paid bills.

3. Had a really good acting class, made some good networking inroads.

Today, November 8

1. Took my son to the library, checked out some books and a few films, then went to the park and turned him loose for an hour or so.

2. Scheduled an appointment to take the truck in for oil change and tire rotation.

3. Read some new books to my son.
You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf. - Jon Kabat-Zinn

One day at a time, one step at a time, keep rolling that stone. - Me

Normal is someone you don't know very well. - Anonymous

My diagnoses: Dysthymia, MDD
My current meds: Paxil, 40mg Tegretol, 700mg
My previous meds: Serzone, Prozac, Lexipro, Effexor, Cymbalta

#374 inthewell

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Posted 08 November 2011 - 06:12 PM

November 8th, 2011

*Got to admire the dozen roses my husband gave me for my birthday yesterday. Brought a smile to my face and warmth to my heart.

*Seen an friend I graduated from high school with and did some catching up.

*My miniature pony has stayed in the pasture - she did not find a way to sneak out of the new fence we made for her.

#375 modestmouse_2011

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Posted 08 November 2011 - 10:25 PM

1. Voted for the first time ever. Felt kinda important.
2. Got a decent amount of homework and college app stuff done today.
3. There was no school because of elections so I actually got to eat three real meals today.

"I want you to be everything that's you, deep at the center of your being." -Confucius


#376 Brah

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Posted 08 November 2011 - 11:16 PM

1). It was a beautiful day today, so I went to the park and enjoyed the great weather.

2). Got halfway through my book, I'll probably finish it tomorrow.

3). Had a good time at play practice. Although I missed dinner because it ran too long, I struck up a few conversations and had a nice time.

Edited by Brah, 08 November 2011 - 11:17 PM.


#377 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 09 November 2011 - 07:34 AM

Voted for the first time ever. Felt kinda important.

YAY for voting!!!!!

Tuesday November 8-2011:
1. Up early with multiple anxiety attacks, treated with 2 separate doses of 1/2 Klonopin. I was impressed that either in spite of, or because of, the anxiety, I was able to put in a call to Donna at the insurance company and get lots of good information in our 20 minute 10:40am call. That included info re submitting claim for lost contents of fridge! I was then able to relay to Diane the info for submitting the ServiceMaster bill to insurance.

2. I got myself down to basement early (1:30pm) in advance of ServiceMaster 2pm return appointment to finish up. *Took more photos*, including details of equipment used--and relieved my anxiety by *calling PA Warmline*, talking to Joseph for the first time, from 1:45pm to 2:10pm. Made decision to NOT invite insurance adjuster in for today, anxiety running too high.

3. At 2:30pm, got a call that ServiceMaster was running late, just leaving office at that time. Diane and assistant Lee arrived 3:30pm and stayed one hour, packing up equipment, taking up those "contaminated" wood strips on floor, and shampooing carpet.

4. Sue was totally "on track" for errands today, starting at 2:10pm and finishing at 6:05pm. She got renewal prescription of my anti-anxiety meds, more fresh produce at Willi Co-op, and free yogurt at Stop n Shop. She ended up arriving here shortly past the arrival of ServiceMaster, so after unloading groceries, I sent her on her way to Spring Hill for furnace and dehumidifier/mail check. Once back here, Sue cleaned carrot juice containers for me, fed Maggie, and helped me unpack Rawvolution food box. Also, trash to shed. We put out "old" baby carrots for deer.

5. Arrival of first Rawvolution box! which contains gourment raw meals for the week. This is to substitute for my loss of raw chef Marie. Tried the eggless egg salad with a greens salad tonight.

6. Was at the point of collapse earlier, but revived enough to talk for an hour (8pm to 9pm) to Bill about possible coaching program. Had made notes earlier to share with him. Felt first release of loss of Eric.

7. Enjoyed Dancing with the Stars, followed by interview show with country music performers Faith Hill et al.
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#378 hocico

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Posted 09 November 2011 - 12:07 PM

Got my infusion done quickly today and with no side effects.
Got some bargains in Morrisons after my infusion.
My wife got home quickly and safely.
Do not wait for extraordinary circumstances to do good; try to use ordinary situations. - Jean Paul Richter
Democracy no longer works for the poor if politicians treat them as a separate race - Frank Field

#379 LonelyHiker

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Posted 09 November 2011 - 08:19 PM

1. Ran 2.5 miles today.

2. Scheduled an audition for Cymbeline with the Richmond Shakespeare Festival this Saturday.

3. Had a great group meeting tonight with my divorce club buddies, shared a lot of fellowship and positive stuff.

4. Have been enjoying catching up with my friend Linda in Chicago via email.
You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf. - Jon Kabat-Zinn

One day at a time, one step at a time, keep rolling that stone. - Me

Normal is someone you don't know very well. - Anonymous

My diagnoses: Dysthymia, MDD
My current meds: Paxil, 40mg Tegretol, 700mg
My previous meds: Serzone, Prozac, Lexipro, Effexor, Cymbalta

#380 Brah

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Posted 09 November 2011 - 09:32 PM

1). Went into town today with a friend, had a pretty nice time.

2). I got checked out quite a few times so my self-esteem is boosted.

3). Play practice went well.

Edited by Brah, 09 November 2011 - 09:33 PM.


#381 matthew7752

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Posted 09 November 2011 - 11:13 PM

1. Had a pretty good visit with my therapist today, she told me some good tips.

2. Gonna start reading a book again, before I go to sleep.

3. Went another day without drinking soda.

#382 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 10 November 2011 - 02:46 AM

Wednesday November 9-2011:
Very grateful to be home from Windsor!!! Number of traffic jams en route, but mostly on the other side of road!

Today's positives:
1. Awake 11am with anxiety, but managed to manage it with just 1/2 pill. This was a really hard exhausting day for me, but many positives and quite a bit accomplished.

2. Left 2:30pm or so as planned for Windsor after packing car with my Compaq laptop and 5 lbs of carrots. Achieved major goals:

(1) Got gas at Marty's, had fluids checked and hood latch lubricated.

(2) Arrived PC Computer place and Bryan checked out battery latch; one trick and it worked perfectly(!) and he ordered replacement batteries for both laptops. As a bonus, I found a perfect handicap parking spot at PC computer, and Bryan later helped me carry my laptop back to car.

(3) Arrived Raw Food Central just past 4pm. Son Windsor helped me carry in my carrots from the car, and showed me the parts to Hurom juicer. Later, Kristin and Curt arrived. Curt first made me a glass of carrot juice with baby carrots. Kristin later set me up to use my remaining 5 lbs of regular carrots for a jug of juice to take home. Kristlin gave me good bye *hug* just before 6pm. No hummus or mock tuna, but I am promised both for Sunday. Also more herb crackers. And a mushroom brush if she can find one (at Bed Bath Beyond or elsewhere). Mentioned that student Mark of Bloomfield did their cabinetry. As a bonus, Kristin gave me the remaining 3 or 4 dessert bars leftover from recent class.

(4) I actually made a stop at Grand Union on the way home, in spite of being tired. No mushrooms on salad bar, but did get some bottle brushes and one of their sturdy paper bags.

3. Arrived home to surprise emailed photos from Eric (of concrete supports at Spring Hill and of cabin screen door). Sent him message back.

4. Delicious Rawvolution dinner. Had the fresh carrot juice I had just made at Raw Central, along with delicious Rawvolution Greek pizza on onion bread. Smashing! I didn't even mind the olives, and wished there was more. Maggie licked some of the sauce off my finger. I also took on what I thought would be one of my least favorite dishes: cucumber/watercress soup. Managed to eat half of that, interspersed with the pizza.

5. Enjoyed the music of Country Music Awards show tonight.
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#383 matthew7752

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Posted 10 November 2011 - 08:44 PM

1. I talked with a good friend at work.

2. I have a terrible fear of public speaking, but I survived talking in front of my class today.

3. I possibly found some activities to do in my city with other people I do not know.

#384 corduroyndenim

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Posted 10 November 2011 - 09:13 PM

1. Got to work on time.
2. Wrote in my journal.
3. ?

#385 Sharla

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Posted 10 November 2011 - 11:32 PM

I quit my job (been wanting to for a while) :smilingteeth:

I watched my son win ribbons at his Sports Day

I actually got in the garden and pulled some weeds
Bipolar, Major depressive disorder, Dermatillomania.

#386 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 11 November 2011 - 10:38 AM

Thursday November 10-2011:
NOTE: two full anti-anxiety pills today; anxiety ran rampant for most the day.

1. High anxiety had me up early (maybe 9am???), and decided to just stay up and try to get some things done. Therefore decided to invite insurance adjuster Rick over at 10:40am to look at basement. He stayed about 40 minutes, and even helped change a light bulb in front walkway lights! He was very pleasant and informative re what documents he needs, and what counts and what doesn't toward reimbursement from insurance company.

2. Sue needed to come early today, so I invited her over for 12:30noontime, and she worked until 4:45pm. First she did "little" things, like check 231 mailbox, put away laptop cases in proper order after my PC trip yesterday, put a jug of water in Taurus, fed Maggie, helped me sort out Rawvolution food items in order to freeze and preserve some of them, and get rid of empty Rawvolution packing carton. Then Sue set out on her major job of the day: to finally clean the downstairs toilet at Spring Hill. We loaded up cleaning supplies for her to take, and I managed to do this in spite of continuing high anxiety. She took short squat plastic cups, one containing Soft Scrub, plus a double-sided sponge and gloves and a toothpick to break seal on Soft Scrub. We debated about bleach, but decided against due to ventilation issues in the lavatory. When Sue left Spring Hill, there was a clean toilet, a bag of trash removed at last from Spring Hill kitchen, and paper towel, clean garbage bag, empty cup, and one pair gloves left on kitchen stove for future use.

When Sue returned here, she helped me find Maggie, who had dug into a hidden sleeping place in lavender room and was determined not to come out. Sue clocked out, and we then had an interesting discussion re spiritual beliefs. Helped ground me.

3. The bill from Eric came in the mail to Spring Hill today. Sue read me the contents over the phone.

4. I succeeded in redrafting Eric emails to send soon.

5. I succeeded in capturing all the Care-Com contact phone numbers today before they disappeared tomorrow along with my premium membership.

6. It took a long time for my stomach to quiet down, but around 9pm I was able to eat a healthy raw dinner: carrot juice and cucumber/watercress juice, along with onion bread with raw version of "Big Mac". Also the remainder of eggless egg salad combined with greens/tomatoes.
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#387 Rainbowglow

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Posted 12 November 2011 - 01:13 AM

--quiet relaxing day

--good book tonight

--my cat just came to see me!

#388 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 12 November 2011 - 02:12 AM

Friday Nov 11-2011:
1. Up early, maybe 8:30am. Decided to get up the moment the anxiety hit, rather than let it build up while lying in bed. Proud to say I made it through the day with only 1/2 Klonopin.

2. Good move in calling massage therapist, even though it didn't work out for a massage today. The call itself helped me feel connected. Karen will email schedule for next week later.

3. Finally got my shower today, around 3pm. Unexpected motivation was having a diarrhea accident while relaxing in lounge chair! Don't really want to do that again, but it did force me to immediately strip and get right in shower, no hesitation.

4. Around 5:00pm, I completed my editing of Eric email and sent it on its way for better or worse. It is done as best I could do it, sent with a prayer and a blessing.

5. Got some work done late night tonight.
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#389 OceanBreeze9721

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Posted 12 November 2011 - 03:35 AM

Cleaned my house today and got more organized

My house is ready for my son to visit

Spent a lovely day with my daughter

Don't let your emotions be in control of you.  You be in control of your emotions.

When worry thoughts come up, ask if it is something that I can let go of.  Is it something I have to worry about or can I let it go.  Count backwards from ten and let it go.

To not feel awkward in social situations, act interested in others and it will ease some of the anxieties.

Breathe relax and regroup even if for a few seconds.

Balance down time with activities and exercise. Not too much sleep and not too much exercise.

Set realistic goals and check them once in a while.

Don't let only negative thoughts be the ones to focus on, focus on the good things, even if only a few.


#390 LonelyHiker

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Posted 12 November 2011 - 05:59 PM

Catching up:

Thursday November 10

1. Ran 2.5 miles

2. Got the truck inspected (no charge!), oil changed, tires rotated.

3. Got groceries, bought my son a balloon that looks like a turkey with a pilgrim's hat :smile:

4. Spent a fun afternoon with my son, took him to the library.

Friday November 11

1. Got my new headshots & resumes squared away.

2. Finished polishing up my audition piece for Richmond Shakespeare.

3. Had a good evening at work, coworker said he enjoys working with me because I motivate him!

Saturday November 12

1. Had a great morning at work, despite a lack of sleep.

2. My audition went very well, got to meet some of the peeps who work with Richmond Shake.

3. Despite being dog-tired when I got home from the audition, ran my 2.5 miles, and my time was the best yet!
You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf. - Jon Kabat-Zinn

One day at a time, one step at a time, keep rolling that stone. - Me

Normal is someone you don't know very well. - Anonymous

My diagnoses: Dysthymia, MDD
My current meds: Paxil, 40mg Tegretol, 700mg
My previous meds: Serzone, Prozac, Lexipro, Effexor, Cymbalta

#391 Brah

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Posted 12 November 2011 - 06:12 PM

1). Practice went by really quick today.

2). Had dinner with some friends, joking around made me come out of my shell more and feel better about myself.

3). I get to go home in a couple minutes.

#392 Jellyfish

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Posted 12 November 2011 - 11:04 PM

I've spent the last couple of days at the aquarium where I volunteer (four days out of the last 6) and I'm going to volunteer the next two days as well. This is the only thing I have positives for, but there are many:

1) Volunteering means I am operating on a normal (daytime) schedule, which is something I hate, but is somewhat necessary at this stage of life, so its a good thing in a way.

2) When I am at the aquarium, I am reminded that I do have a passion, and that helps remind me to be optimistic about the future.

3) I meet people there who are as dorky about that field of study as I am, and I share my passion with them. Everyone ends up happy in that situation!

4) We're having a recognition dinner next week, and I won't feel like a fraud going to it because I have been putting in time.

5) Today, I was able to sit on the floor with a penguin, which is a pretty awesome thing to do!

6) Because I've been in there, I'll be orienting to rescue team soon, and that means that I'll have hands on experience in the marine hospital, which is both sort of amazing on its own, and a very good thing for future prospects in the field.

7) Someone who has been with the research foundation I am associated with for its duration commented to others that I'd be working there in a year, which means that while its not a job offer, they recognize that I'm the sort of person they normally work with. There are perhaps 10 employees in the entire foundation, so even though its not a promise, its flattering!

#393 Paperdolleze

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Posted 13 November 2011 - 02:20 AM

I started to read this thread and it made me feel happy, and positive.

Positives from today

  • I joined this forum
  • I practiced my music
  • There is food in my home, a roof over my families head, and my children happy playing with their friends.


#394 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 13 November 2011 - 09:56 AM

5) Today, I was able to sit on the floor with a penguin, which is a pretty awesome thing to do!

Wow, Jellyfish, how awesome is that indeed!~Peace

Saturday Nov 12-2011:
1. Up at 10am: still getting up at early hour. Also maintained today with 1/2 Klonopin only.

2. Ordered RawVolution box for next week.

3. Several productive phone conversations:
*Talked for 40 minutes to Bill @ 1:30pm and got first assignment from him.
*Talked to Lidia for half hour around 4PM and discussed juicers.
*Talked to Bill's brother-in-law David for 12 minutes around 4:30pm about possible handyman jobs.
Note: I seemed very "open" to answering the phone "live" today.

4. Did laundry this afternoon, cleaning up all the diarrhea accident items from yesterday, plus freshening my favorite skirt and blouse.

5. I am amazed that in spite of reoccurring tiredness periods all day, I actually did my very first "infusion" of raw mushrooms tonight (placed sliced raw mushrooms in olive oil and herbs and left to soak/marinate overnight). I did cheat and have a few mushrooms in my salad tonight (without the overnight soak), along with the last of my fresh carrot juice from Wednesday, and another RawVoluton dinner item.

6. Harry Potter films on family channel kept me company in between working and many rest breaks. My cat was a great comfort during rest breaks also.
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#395 DarkRain

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Posted 13 November 2011 - 05:51 PM

This may seem like such an insignificant thing to some people but I think today was the first day I was able to enjoy classical guitar music without feeling guilty.

I've spent the last couple of days at the aquarium where I volunteer (four days out of the last 6) and I'm going to volunteer the next two days as well. This is the only thing I have positives for, but there are many:

I wish I could volunteer at an aquarium! There aren't close by. :sad:

Edited by DarkRain, 13 November 2011 - 05:52 PM.

"There is some good in this world Mr. Frodo and it's worth fighting for."

"I will not say do not weep, for not all tears are an evil."

"My friends are my power! And I'm theirs!"

Posted Image

#396 MommyofPrecious

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Posted 13 November 2011 - 11:39 PM

1. I got out of the house
2. I made dinner, even though I had to defrost something (ick)
3. I thought very few negative thoughts

#397 matthew7752

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Posted 15 November 2011 - 02:26 AM

1. I asked a girl from work that I like a question, and got a very inappropriate response, which I really liked.

2. I did not cry anytime during the day.

3. Had more positive thoughts than negative today.

#398 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 15 November 2011 - 10:31 AM

Sunday Nov 13-2011
1. Up around 10am again, took 1/2 Klonopin for anxiety plus Immodium (2) to prevent diarrhea today. Busy with catch-up stuff on computer and collecting water samples for testing in today's raw class.

2. Made it for early 2pm class. Enjoyed verbal sharing section, where I also shared stuffed raw Jalapenos from RawVolution. Around 3pm took time-out in car for 20-25 minutes while video was shown. Came back inside in time for water testing. Really needed that recharge (and a raw energy bar!) to keep me going for the long day.

3. Chlorella is finally in! That's one good thing off my mind (I thought I was going to have to mail-order more); also got tub of mock tuna (although no hummus or crackers were available).

4. Class included tasty warm soups made in the blender: corn chowder and pleasant pea soup.

5. Exchanged contact info with classmate Dianne, plus Mansfield Center woman Derri and raw chef Rachel from potluck!

6. Mary and Dianne got me set with an empty bowl to take raw buffet items home for later, since my stomach was "off". Included slices of my first-ever persimmon, and slices of Rachel's homemade pies. Sally gifted some of us with tiny bulbs of homegrown garlic.

With both class and potluck today, I was at Raw Central from 2pm to 8pm, quite a marathon, but the good company and conversation and soothing lights and piano music kept me going at the potluck. There was one mother and 4-year-old daughter there: the daughter Alyssandra kept making the rounds and finding out our names.

7. Received surprise voicemail from Pam tonight, just after I pulled in the driveway at home at Wormwood. She was checking in on my weekend, so thoughtful of her. Left voicemails back for her, as I was just too late to talk to her "live".

8. I feel inexplicably happy tonight (although a bit over-reved!) I feel like I may have made a friend (Rachel) in addition to a raw personal chef!
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#399 PeacePilgrim

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Posted 15 November 2011 - 11:36 AM

Monday November 14-2011:
1. Massage today at 2:30pm. It was obvious that I was tense and tired, but Karen got some of the kinks out! Karen also invited me to her open house on Sunday November 27th.

2. Pam invited me to phone her around 4:15pm, during her trip home from work, to discuss whether to invite Rachel on board not only as personal raw chef, but also as "versatile personal assistant". Pam and my massage therapist agreed on this one: better not to combine the two, at least for now! Pam adopted a "wait and see" attitude: first see if personal chef aspect works out, then just see if the other spontaneously happens or not. Don't want to push Rachel into something she's not eager for; she is definitely eager for the personal chef job and teaching cooking. (She even said she had an extra dehydrator she could loan me.)

3. ****Best of the day: Email from Eric. No question, hands down, that this was the top positive of the day. After sending 2 email messages of apology and conciliation to Eric, along with tons of healing white energy--I finally heard back via email with a short note around 6:30pm tonight, that he had received my messages and would get back to me in a few days' time.

4. On tv: Dancing with the Stars, followed by excellent Diane Sawyer interview with Gabby Giffords and Mark Kelly. I did rest and rest and rest in bed while watching, but as tired as I was, I was amazed that I stayed fully awake for both.
Posted ImagePosted Image

My cat does not desert me, my cat does not judge me.

My life is not at all what I thought it would be and I am rather stunned and in shock trying to figure out what it actually is.

Paco was full of life even in the face of death. He would never pass up an opportunity to participate in, and rejoice in, life. I am remembering how I honored him the year following his passing, in saying: "What would Paco do?", and thereby finding the courage to do many things I might have passed by.

#400 kevw

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Posted 15 November 2011 - 12:09 PM

In short 2 things.

1. I found this site!!!!!
2. I have caught myself every time I have been going to lie and stopped.

I feel so much better and put most of it down to reading similar stories and finally acting to fix my 'issues'. A long long long way to go but eventually i hope to gain the trust of my wife and maybe save my marriage.

As I say I have a long way to go.

Thanks to you all.
Positive thoughts. Start from the beginning. Anything can be achieved.




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