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Abnormal & Irrational Behaviour, Bad Judgements And Poor Decision Making


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#1 thermalnermal

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Posted 28 October 2010 - 05:24 PM

I posted this yesterday on the drugs section of the forum, but I also wanted to make sure that others who are not taking Sertraline would see it because it is relevant to depression as an illness not necessarily just to this drug treatment.

I did something really bad shortly after increasing my dose of Sertraline from 50mg to 100mg. I made a decision which was totally irrational, abnormal and out of character. It's too shameful to describe. I did something at work which I now regret for which I am now being disciplined. Side affects of Sertaline describe 'reduced ability to react normally to everyday situations'. I compromised my integrity and honesty.

Has anyone else experienced doing something completely stupid. I have never done anything illegal or requiring disciplinary action, except sickness absence but that is part of depression - good days, bad days (a struggle) and terrible days when you can't even drag yourself out of bed.

This happened over a month ago and has now only been discovered by management. Hence my recollection was somewhat faded. But I believe I did it because I was scared of the draconian sickness policy that has recently been adopted to help them make people redundant. I just didn't want another sick day on my record.

Anyway I was just wondering if anyone else has done something stupid which they attribute to their medication or depression.

I feel terrible and guilty, and I am now off work with an anxiety attack. I am likely to get sacked if they don't take my illness as mitigation. Seeing union rep tomorrow to see where we go with this.

On the positive, I went to my GP who was very supportive and was willing to write a letter supporting the fact that my depression may have contributed to my irrational decision.


#2 theguy

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Posted 28 October 2010 - 06:07 PM

I posted this yesterday on the drugs section of the forum, but I also wanted to make sure that others who are not taking Sertraline would see it because it is relevant to depression as an illness not necessarily just to this drug treatment.

I did something really bad shortly after increasing my dose of Sertraline from 50mg to 100mg. I made a decision which was totally irrational, abnormal and out of character. It's too shameful to describe. I did something at work which I now regret for which I am now being disciplined. Side affects of Sertaline describe 'reduced ability to react normally to everyday situations'. I compromised my integrity and honesty.

Has anyone else experienced doing something completely stupid. I have never done anything illegal or requiring disciplinary action, except sickness absence but that is part of depression - good days, bad days (a struggle) and terrible days when you can't even drag yourself out of bed.

This happened over a month ago and has now only been discovered by management. Hence my recollection was somewhat faded. But I believe I did it because I was scared of the draconian sickness policy that has recently been adopted to help them make people redundant. I just didn't want another sick day on my record.

Anyway I was just wondering if anyone else has done something stupid which they attribute to their medication or depression.

I feel terrible and guilty, and I am now off work with an anxiety attack. I am likely to get sacked if they don't take my illness as mitigation. Seeing union rep tomorrow to see where we go with this.

On the positive, I went to my GP who was very supportive and was willing to write a letter supporting the fact that my depression may have contributed to my irrational decision.

I used to be on Zoloft and went from 50mg to 100mg then by the 2nd week I was really giddy. That is my experience.
The Guy. - Love is patient, love is kind, love never fails.

#3 BetterOff

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Posted 28 October 2010 - 08:06 PM

Hello, just want to say hi and fyi... *everyone* makes bad decisions wether on medication or not. When Depressed we have to be extra careful in what we do because depression tends to make us make bad decisions. Please do not be down on yourself, I think everyone here on DF will admit to making a very bad decision while depressed, *I* have made tons of bad decisions depressed. Please do not get upset or berate yourself any more. At this point, what is done is done. Is there any thing good about thinking about it nor or obsessing about it now? The answer is NO, what is done is done and its in the past and what you do is put yourself in as good a mood as you can and say I am going to do the best job I can and that is all anyone can do.

One of the keys to being happy and doing away with depression is not to look back, but to look forward with a positive attitude...
Good Luck, feel free to PM me anytime. I will be happy to tell you some of the good ones I did I regret but have discarded as no longer worth my health to dwell on them. You are only human after all, be kind to yourself, again what is in the past is done, kaput, over with, dont let it effect your future...
Information supplied on Depression Forums by members should not be relied upon and is not a substitute for medical advice from a health professional or doctor.

#4 thermalnermal

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Posted 29 October 2010 - 12:24 PM

Really hard to look forward and be positive at the mo. Can't help dwelling on the worst that could happen. However I do know that even if it seems like the worst thing right now, things usually happen for a reason and a new opportunity could be just around the corner.

#5 thermalnermal

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Posted 26 November 2010 - 10:41 AM

In case any one is interested.

I had my disciplinary hearing yesterday. It was the most awful thing I have ever had to go through, I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. (I understand that others may have been through something more awful).

However, I did get through it and now after 12 months of struggling with depression at work it looks like I will finally get the support I need to remain in work and to get better! (counselling and reduced hours) Such a shame it had to come to this.

I had amazing support from the union who represented me.

I have also felt supported by being able to contribute to and read posts on this forum. Thanks to all who have sent me encouraging words.

I didn't get sacked but I did get a final written warning.

Just got to get well enough now to get back to work. I have tried to explain to my boss that this won't happen over night. I still don't think he really gets it. Anyway I am going to make it my mission to make sure that awareness and understanding of depression in the workplace is improved so that others can get the support they need.

I never felt from the outset that my managers could understand that I was ill, I'm sure they thought I was skiving and taking sickies for no reason. I never felt that they were taking it seriously and for this reason I did not feel comfortable sharing what was going on. If they could have recognised the signs that I was struggling instead of waiting for me to mess up big time, I would have recognised that my medication was not working and perhaps even asked to be signed off work again. Trouble is when you are down you don't have the energy to fight for what you need, you just struggle on and hope the meds will work eventually and things will get back to normal, unfortunately it doesn't always work like that and you desperately need people around you to be supportive and understanding.

They say that what doesn't **** you makes you stronger and although I have been through a horrible few weeks I can now put all this behind me and concentrate on getting well and hopefully doing something so that people who are not strong enough to help themselves while they are in depression can get the support they need.

At my workplace we have support groups for disability, ethnicity, sexual orientation etc. I am considering setting one up for mental health problems. If we all came out I think it would be surprising just how many people have been touched by this illness and there is much more strength in numbers.

#6 BetterOff

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Posted 26 November 2010 - 02:26 PM

Hello, and just wanted to say congratulations of getting through it. I am sure your anxiety level is pretty high, but consider, its done, its over with, and now you can move forward. Dont dwell on anymore as its non-productive and not good for your mental state. I am extremely happy for you and if you just continue to do your job good and if something questionable comes up ask for a managers advice, then you have covered yourself. We all make mistakes and this one will probably drop off your record after a certain amount of time has elapsed if you just stop and carefully consider your actions before you proceed, especially in any iffy situation. When we are on meds or having an off day from depression and anxiety, it can lead to bad judgement calls and I am glad that the union stepped in for you.
You can hang in there and do it and learn to be a better person and how better to handle a problem and we all learn from our mistakes so hopefully nothing like this will happen again!
I wish you all the best! and good luck
Information supplied on Depression Forums by members should not be relied upon and is not a substitute for medical advice from a health professional or doctor.




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