1) Paroxetine 20mg/40mg (Paxil, Seroxat, Sereupin, Aropax, Deroxat, Rexetin, Xetanor, Paroxat)
2) Fluoxetine 20mg /40mg (Prozac, Fontex, Seromex, Seronil, Sarafem, Fluctin (EUR), Fluox (NZ), Depress (UZB), Lovan (AUS))
3) Escitalopram 20mg (Lexapro, Cipralex, Esertia)
4) Lofepramine 70mg (trademarked Gamanil, Tymelyt, generic Lomont)
Told it was an Anti-depressant, but later discovered it was an antipschycotic?
5)Flupentixol (INN) or flupenthixol
6) Venlafaxine 150mg (tradenames Effexor XR, Effexor) (Current medication)
Right, well I have recently switched to Venlafaxine due to trial and error and all the others previous to this have not worked. Although, the seroxat worked wonders when I first took it.
Anyway, I used to have some serious anger control issues before I took any type of AD, but thought that was due down to hormonal angst and teenage hormones. However, since starting the Venlafaxine I have found that this "anger" has returned. I am fine and perfectly calm if on my own, but if I have to go out and eg go shopping I tend to slowly start to get tense and angry. People just seem to wander aimlessley and get in my way. I start screaming in my head "for god sake get out the ****** way" and just stand there, fists clenched. Or if someone doesn't hold a door when they have finished etc again the comments begin in my head.
I get aggitated and irritable very easily, if for some reason I am doing my coat up and the zip gets stuck I try once or twice and then I can' t stand it anymore I will physically just rip the thing of and chuck across the room my anger is so fierce. It scares me sometimes.
If I am driving and someone cuts me up, I am a lunatic! I used to be calm, but I feel like a frayed peice of rope. My control isn't what it used to be.
Even now, when I sit next to my mom in the evenings and she is watching tv, the rustle of her newpaper has my eye twitching and fists clenching and I long to scream at her "be quiet". I don't of course, because that is rude and its not her fault. But I can rationalise myself till I'm blue in the face but I still can't control my temper. When no one is around and something happens I punch walls, kick things.
I just wondered if anyone else was like this? I am cheery and cheerful, but quick to temper is someone says something I think is stupid, even if its a valid question. i get angry and think "why are they wasting my time" I don't understand why I am like this.
Like I said before i have always had anger issues but the pills to begin seemed to rein in that side of my temper. I do lots of physical activity like go to the gym and go out running and cycling just to try and burn of some of the energy because it feels like a ball of flames trying to consume me.
Sometimes its almost like ants crawling up my skins, just everything is an irritation. its not fair on me, but mostly its not fair on others around me. I do and am happy on the venlafaxine, its calmed or toned down the depression quite a lot. To the point were splitting with my ex was a mere blip in my life and not something spiralling out of control leading to suicidal thoughts.
I have no patience, I feel angry, strung out, but not tired. If anyone can relate or if this sounds familiar, please let me know.
Edited by becca158, 19 March 2009 - 10:44 AM.