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I'm So Angry All The Time


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#1 nealy

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 01:47 AM

I don't know why this is happening to me. For the past month or so, I have been having intense feelings of anger. I get extremely angry at the smallest things and I just want to throw things, punch things, and just yell! I mean it get's to the point where I am shaking and I can't calm down. I need to go into a room, be by myself and take deep breaths until I feel better. I don't where all of this is coming from but it is not good, and it is scaring me. I've been on sertraline and clonazepam for about 3 months now and I don't know if this has something to do with it or not. I haven't spoken to my doctor about this either, which I should, but I wanted to come here first. Can anyone relate to this? Or offer me some kind of advice? I'm really starting to scare my boyfriend, and I am always so angry at him for no good reason! The other day I threw my ring at him and I swore so many times at him, and cried, and cried, and told him to leave and never come back. My throat hurt so bad from yelling so much. It was all because he wouldn't take me to the store right at that moment. Can you beleive how upset I got over something so stupid? I am embarrased and I feel bad for putting him through this. I'm sick of all this. I'm scared at times of what could happen with all the anger I have inside. Why is this happening to me? :hearts:

-Nealy


Be strong now because things will get better. It might be stormy now, but it can't rain forever.

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#2 hulk

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 02:46 AM

I've experienced something very similar to this and it may be the same reason why these things are happening to you. From what I've seen and what I myself have done when you look at something that happens in your life at every possible way then the last thing that comes to mind is to get angry at it. I've seen this happen on extreme measures with my brother and with other people at random places such as stores and what not. I don't know if this is the case as I am no professional and I have problems of my own. I'm just saying what I have seen in this part of depression. Depression can lead to anger and violence. Sometimes when feeling bad about something or completely out of control people can become angry at something and try to build power over it.

#3 nealy

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 03:02 AM

That's what I am afraid of. I'm afraid that the anger is just going to get worse and that I could become violent and that is not who I am! I'm just not understanding why this is happening. The emotional part of this is what is hurting me the most. I get so angry, then I get extremely sad and burst into tears. I mean I cry so hard that I can't even breath. That's how it happens every time. I don't want to hurt anyone. I don't know what to do. I'm afraid. :hearts:

Edited by nealy, 04 March 2009 - 03:03 AM.

-Nealy


Be strong now because things will get better. It might be stormy now, but it can't rain forever.

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#4 Elise

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 03:08 AM

Hey Nealy,
I've had episodes of feeling angry and from what I've read her on DF so do a lot of people experiencing depression. They seem to pass but it might be a good idea to check in with your doctor. Can you do that?
Elise
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#5 nealy

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 03:32 AM

Hey Nealy,
I've had episodes of feeling angry and from what I've read her on DF so do a lot of people experiencing depression. They seem to pass but it might be a good idea to check in with your doctor. Can you do that?
Elise


Hi Elise. I don't really think it's something that will just pass. It's been going on for over a month and it is just getting worse. I know I need to speak with my doctor and I will. I just wanted to come here first to get advice, which everyone is probably going to tell me to talk with my doctor, so I guess we will leave it at that then.

-Nealy


Be strong now because things will get better. It might be stormy now, but it can't rain forever.

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#6 nealy

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 08:12 PM

:hearts: :flowers: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :tear2: :help: :help: :help: :mad1: :bump: :bump: :bump: :bump: :bump: :nod: :nod: :nod: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :bow: :no: :wub: :hearthrob: :hearthrob: :hearthrob: :hearthrob: :hearthrob: :hearthrob: :winkkiss: :winkkiss: :winkkiss: :sneaky2: :shifty3: :blush21: :biggrin: :flowers: :console: :hearts: :cheesy: :icon12: :inlove: :unsure: :blush: :flirt: :tear2: :laugh: :smile: :happy: :joker: :stare: :ninja: :sheep: :roll2: :cold: :yawn: :help: :book: :hugs: :ermm: :mad1: :oops: :blah: :sigh: :sigh: :bump: :wwww: :kiss: :hmm: :huh: :nod: :cry: :bow: :wub: :taz: :no: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :mad1: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

:hugs:

-Nealy


Be strong now because things will get better. It might be stormy now, but it can't rain forever.

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#7 nealy

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 08:25 PM

I'm so sick of this. I am talking to myself. It's been a crap load of hours and I haven't gotten ANY support!!!!!!!! Fine. I'm always alone anyway. **** this life!!!!!!!

-Nealy


Be strong now because things will get better. It might be stormy now, but it can't rain forever.

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#8 pearlseeker

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 08:29 PM

:hearts: ((((((Nealy))))) :flowers: I'm sorry sweetie! I just wish I knew what to tell you other than to go to the hospital or Dr!! I get angry too and when I get very bad I try to go for a drive and scream a while! That probably sounds rediculous but it helps me!! Hugs!!! Love Pearly
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#9 Sunny Rainy Day

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 09:00 PM

:hearts: Nealy
I get mad over stupid little things as well. Just earlier actually I was starting to get frustrated at a vacuum, just because it wouldn't fit into the space it was in before. I have broken many things because of it. What I do is usually immediately stop what I'm doing/trying to do and allow myself to calm down before I reach boiling point. I understand where some of my anger comes from so maybe that's why I'm able to control it better. I would suggest getting to the root of it (as there usually is one), possibly through a therapist or doctor, as others have suggested, if you can. If you do, bring your bf, if you can, so he can get a better understanding of the situation and offer support/love.

#10 Louie*34

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Posted 05 March 2009 - 05:08 AM

Wow Nealy, It's me who really needs your help. My husband has this exact same problem. I never know who is going to walk through the door. He has been diagnosed with bipolar and meds were prescribed which worked very well for awhile. Even though the meds made him very sleepy it was okay since he was feeling so much better. But now, guess what? His work cut medical benefits in order to avoid lay offs. They want 130 dollars for it and we just can't afford it. I lost my job recently. I am hoping you can enlighten me on just what it is that makes you cross the line between just being angry and yelling and striking out and/or smashing things. So far my husband has ripped up our new mattress, put his fist through my laptop, threw the car into park while driving and has smashed up several cell phones. I try so hard to understand and even though I can sense when he's mad it seems that if I try to diffuse it things only get worse. An example, he had no clean socks the other morning and started to dig through the dirty clothes basket for some, I know gross, so I got up to look through his drawers and he got so mad he picked up the basket and threw it against the wall. I am just about ready to leave him, we've been together for 27 years and I can't take much more. I hope that by sharing with me your story you'll be able to help us both realize just what is going on and what brings out the :hearts: I know even the bible says "Be angry but do not sin" in it somewhere. I'm not all that religious but if someone could explain that to me it might help as well.

#11 Elise

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Posted 05 March 2009 - 05:18 AM

Nealy,
I'm sorry you're feeling like you're not getting support. Also I can see how mad you get if people just keep telling you to go to a doctor. It's just that it's hard to know what to say. If it's been going on for a while then you do need to get help.
Sorry sweatheart, but that's the only thing I can say right now.
Lots of love and am thinking of you,
Elise x
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#12 cokes

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Posted 05 March 2009 - 07:10 AM

Hi Nealy

Please go to your Dr or ER. You need support. I can understand you wanting to come here first but we are limited in what we can do. We can always listen and always do care. Please post again even just to vent or PM me. Please note i'm on uk time, it's 12 noon here will be checking in most of the day as im on the sick again!

Cokes xxxxxxxx

#13 arboria

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Posted 05 March 2009 - 09:03 AM

Hi Nealy,

I've experienced some anger along with the the grief due to my mother's death. I found that it was easier to give my general anger focus by directing it at neighbors, friends, etc, for things that I would normally shrug off.

I told a friend of mine about it, and she said that looking back on an episode that she had, that she morphed from self-hating depression to generalized anger. She said that with the anger, she at least felt that her emotions were moving, trying to get somewhere rather than stagnating. I know this won't help you in the throws of an episode, but perhaps it can expand your perspective a bit.

I've read that depression is anger turned inward. Maybe you're moving to another phase. Is there any way you can harness it to do a piece of art- visual or writing, or clean your house, or accomplish something? There are loads of anger management tips on the Net- a quick Google search will yield those.

I found that I had to determine the triggers of my anger and remove them, at least for now. Facebook was irritating me. I thought about my friends "if you have time for Facebook, you have time to call your grieving friend. Yet you're not." My sister was on a drinking binge and driving drunk to boot. I was terrified that I'd lose my sister on top of my father and mother. So I had to put my "dispassionate concern" into effect for her and just let it go, remind myself that it's her struggle and there is nothing I can do.

Once I removed those triggers, I improved a great deal within a couple of days. Now and then, it pops back up, but for the most part, it has worked itself out.

My advice: go into overdrive with every resource you have available and every skill you've learned along the way to take care of yourself. Tell yourself that you will overcome it and keep your eye on your goal to stay focused.

I hope this helps at least a little. :)

Create your own peace. No one will give it to you.

 

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