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Prozac, Valium, and Nicotine


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#1 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:34 PM

I'm on prozac, valium/xanax (depends), seroquel, and I smoke cigarettes.  addictively.

lately I've noticed that before I got on the prozac, I still had benzodiazepines and they were working fine, even when I smoked cigarettes.  the cigarettes would just take down the benzo's effects after I had smoked one.. but I had noticed the benzo feeling before smoking the cigarette.  now I've been put on prozac, and I'm still smoking cigarettes, and I've also been placed on 30 mg valium due to my tolerance.  xanax, valium, or any other benzo I've tried does not have any effect on me whatsoever now that I have been put on prozac.  I've come to the conclusion that the nicotine mixed with the prozac is causing the benzos to have absolutely no effect (and believe me, I took 12 5 mg valium and still achieved absolutely no effect whatsoever) Could this be the problem?  I have plenty of valium left, so what I'm thinking of doing is using the valium to quit the nicotine.  Nicotine is a stimulant, therefore reducing a benzodiazepines' central nervous system depressant effects.  The prozac, however, should have nothing to do with the benzo's not working, unless mixed with nicotine--I mean, after all, they do call prozac a motivator.  Does anyone think that stopping smoking would cure the benzodiazepines ineffectiveness?  I'm going cold turkey, but I have at least 70 5 mg valium prescribed left (I was originally prescribed 90 pills) and I was supposed to be taking 30 mg per day.  It's a high dose because of my tolerance, which also comes into this, but that will help me, as valium (and other benzos) are used as stop-smoking aids.  I need the nicotine completely out of my system, and I smoked a cigarette about three hours ago.  I've got a day or so until the withdrawal symptoms start to occur.  Has anyone had a similar situation as mine?

The benzo's that I had been taking while not on prozac but "on" nicotine were xanax 2 mg pills.  Yes, high doses, but they worked quite well, even with the cigarettes, but only PRIOR to smoking a cigarette.  Once a cigarette was smoked, the benzos' effects were gone.

Could all of this very well be the problem?  Or is it that my body just doesn't work with benzodiazepines anymore?

Help me out here.  I'm normally really good with medicine, and I figure this could be a good shot.  Does it sound like a good one to you all?  I'd like a few opinions, but try to keep lecturing to a minimum on the overdosing/tolerance/whatever with the valium and the other benzos, as that won't happen again.  It was basically a dangerous experiment to see if it was my tolerance or if it was because of prozac and nicotine mixed together.  Even the dose of 60 mg, (the 12*5mg experimental dose I took) would give a tolerant benzo person some kind of effect.  So, with that said, it's not the tolerance to the benzos, I don't think.  Does my conclusion sound realistic and worth a try?  Should I really stop smoking and use the valium to my advantage as both for my anxiety and to quit smoking?

FYI:  valium (30 mg) was prescribed for my constant anxiety and paranoia, not as a stop smoking aid.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:36 PM

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Posted: Aug. 18 2005,14:58  
We all have difference tolerances to different meds.  I'd think that 2mg. of Valium would set me in a chair, as I'm not one for benzos.  My doses make people laugh.  I think there was a study done that nicotine will reduce the effect of most psych. meds, but I don't know who did it.  I just heard this lots of time in the past when I worked in a center that prescribed meds.


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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:36 PM

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Posted: Aug. 18 2005,15:09  
Any reason is a good reason to stop smoking.

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#4 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:37 PM

(jillivinilly @ Aug. 18 2005,16:09)
Any reason is a good reason to stop smoking.


Although not helpful, I hear it. :P

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:38 PM

aka Puma
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Posted: Aug. 18 2005,16:10  
I try will to be as helpful as I possibly can, Alcohol.

Talk to your Doctor about other ways to quit smoking and stop screwing with your meds.
What you are talking about is basically being in a semi-coma while going through nicotine withdrawal. Ok, Alcohol, and that will work for what? 48 hours? All you have to do is watch a TV show, See a friend with a smoke, or smell cigarette smoke and you will be dying for one. Get a patch, get some gum, get some other form of cesssation. Valium coma's do not help with giving up anything except consciousness.
C'mon Alcohol, you're smarter than this.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:38 PM

ados
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Posted: Aug. 18 2005,20:45  
I know this isn't what you are looking for, but I pretty much agree with Puma.  I strongly urge you to talk with your doctor about quitting smoking, as well as about how you find the current med combo (possibly also due to smoking) not working for you.

Another option would be to ask your pharmacist the question you asked in your first post.  Sometimes pharmacists have more info on the specifics of the meds.

However, you really should work with your doctor on this.  Have you ever tried wellbutrin as an AD?  It is the same as the med used to help stop smoking; maybe it would work better for your situation.  On the other hand, some people cannot take wellbutrin; there are so many variables that you really need to be working closely with your doctor!

I can share a tiny bit of experience that might relate, but it doesn't really answer your question.  I quit smoking almost 7 months ago.  I am on prozac, and I use .5 to 1mg ativan at bedtime.  I have "slipped up" and smoked maybe 4 cigarettes since I quit (and I was on the same meds back when I did smoke regularly) and I have never noticed any difference in how effective either of my meds are.  Of course, our dosages are so different that my experience may not relate.

I have to wonder if you are fixating on your meds, your smoking (or not smoking) etc.  It is important that you let your doc handle the med dosages and help you through everything you do, including stopping smoking.  Please contact your doctor!  Like Puma said, you are an intelligent guy; use good sense here, okay?  

Karen

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#7 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:39 PM

(aka Puma @ Aug. 18 2005,17:10)
I try will to be as helpful as I possibly can, Alcohol.

Talk to your Doctor about other ways to quit smoking and stop screwing with your meds.
What you are talking about is basically being in a semi-coma while going through nicotine withdrawal. Ok, Alcohol, and that will work for what? 48 hours? All you have to do is watch a TV show, See a friend with a smoke, or smell cigarette smoke and you will be dying for one. Get a patch, get some gum, get some other form of cesssation. Valium coma's do not help with giving up anything except consciousness.
C'mon Alcohol, you're smarter than this.


the valium was prescribed for anxiety... I have to take it anyway.  I figured I could use it as an anti-anxiety agent for stop-smoking, too, and it's working so far.  It was just prescribed for anxiety--not for stop smoking.  But I figured I'd give it a shot and nail it with a double-whammy, and it's working.  My father is a smoker himself (pack and a half a day) and I am around him all of the time, and not once have I been "dying" to have one.  I don't get nicotine CRAVINGS, I get nicotine WITHDRAWAL SYMPTOMS--psychological aand physical ones.. drops in blood pressure, etc.  I know how to quit.  Thanks for trying to help, though.  Maybe I'll clarify exactly what I am trying to say the next time around.

I did talk to the doctor, though, and he said it was the prozac that was making the benzodiazepines not work as well as my tolerance to those types medications (still talking about benzos, here) simply because prozac can and in some cases (me, for instance) cause anxiety, so he put me on celexa, and I should be responding to benzodiazepines again, smoking or not.  He said the nicotine would have a little bit to do with it, but it would not cause it to not work at all, however, the prozac could/can/will/and in my case, did.  Whenever I got on prozac, benzodiazepines flat out stopped working.  When I was off it, they worked.  I think I know that it's the prozac, now, and the smoking has little to do with it, so I might as well just start smoking again, because I don't really care about quitting that much.  The only reason I wanted to quit was because I thought the benzodiazepines were being affected by the nicotine.  Otherwise, I don't care about the smoking.  It was the only reason, because I thought it was the reason for the benzo's not working, when it's 80% the prozac, by the very least.  20% less effective?  that doesn't matter to me.  that's what higher doses are for.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:40 PM

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Posted: Aug. 19 2005,19:25  
Great, that you talked with your doctor about all of this.  It sounds pretty complicated, and everyone is so different.  I hope maybe you decide to keep quitting smoking, because it is so bad for you.  But I know it is very difficult when you live with a smoker!  Good luck with the celexa; it sounds like it may work better for you.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:41 PM

Here's a good reason to stop smoking Matt... it WILL **** you.  period.  Lung cancer, whatever... it's a horrible way to die... and you're starting so early, it's going to cut off a major amount of your natural life.  Don't **** yourself slowly this way.  Do the smart thing... go to medical school, become a doctor, see the effects that smoking can have on your lungs.... stop smoking, ok?  

(listen to your cyber mom)   I CARE what happens to you! ((((((((hugs)))))))

Hope you are well.... (I KNOW you are smart... that never was a question)


#10 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:42 PM

(I am Cat @ Aug. 20 2005,13:36)
Here's a good reason to stop smoking Matt... it WILL **** you.  period.  Lung cancer, whatever... it's a horrible way to die... and you're starting so early, it's going to cut off a major amount of your natural life.  Don't **** yourself slowly this way.  Do the smart thing... go to medical school, become a doctor, see the effects that smoking can have on your lungs.... stop smoking, ok?  

(listen to your cyber mom) :;):  I CARE what happens to you! :hearts: ((((((((hugs)))))))

Hope you are well.... (I KNOW you are smart... that never was a question) :)


I wish my registered username on here wasn't so stupid.  It makes me look like a complete dumbass.

Eventually I'll quit smoking though.  It's gotta stop and you're right, it will cut off years of one's life, but that only depends on who they are.  There have been men who smoked cigarettes addictively for their entire life and they live until 90-100 years old (I've read articles) so it won't **** everyone.  I already know what it does to my lungs, and I'm just taking everything one step at a time.  At the moment, nicotine withdrawal is too scary for me, so I'm not risking it until the stupid prozac gets out of my system.  That's what the doctor said.. that prozac can cause anxiety and cause the benzodiazepines to stop working.  Those benzos make me not want to smoke at all, which is why they're sometimes used as a stop smoking aid.  But I have to wait AT LEAST a week for most of this prozac to eventually get out of my system.  The actual half-life of prozac is 9.3 days.. which shows why no one really has withdrawal symptoms of it... it just tapers on its own.  I'm getting frustrated though, because I just started all over again with a new antidepressant, an antidepressant that just so happens to be the parent of lexapro, which sent me nuts the second time around.. but then again, it only sent me nuts once I started withdrawing from nicotine.

I tried taking at least up to 4 30mg doses valium throughout the day yesterday (no, not all at once) and they did not do a thing, as the prozac is still in my system.  Then again, I don't seem to respond to valium, anyway, but I had taken xanax when prozac was slowly getting into my system, and it did not work, either, and I respond very well to xanax--and klonopin as well.  

The half-life of valium is also at least 20 hours and can last up to 100 hours, so I'd have to wait at least 4.x days until I can take a benzodiazepine and have an effect, considering I took ridiculously high doses, it's still very well in my system and affecting me.  I just can't wait until this prozac gets the hell out of my system so I can start taking benzodiazepines to relieve my horrible anxiety, because nothing else worked.  Not Lamictal, not Trileptal, not Depakote, and not seroquel.  Lamictal and Trileptal made me delusional, and depakote treated me like seroquel treats me: just lowers my manic symptoms and makes me very sleepy and groggy the next morning, unless I get a good 12 hours of sleep, which usually can't happen when you have to get a full time job.  I need something that'll have me stable and have me able to FUNCTION.  I've been having panic attacks and I need those benzo's, but if they aren't working when that prozac is in my system, then I can't take them, so I guess I'll have to constantly deal with lots of panic attacks.  I'm getting them a lot.  The depression is gone: the prozac eliminated it, but now I'm trying celexa, due to my previous success with the child of celexa, lexapro, during the FIRST TIME AROUND.  At least, that's what the doctor recommended.  Gotta go with the doc or you can't go with anything at all.

I'm wondering how celexa is going to affect me as well, but that issue can be discussed in its own forum.

respond, please.  I need some kind of support.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:44 PM

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Posted: Aug. 20 2005,14:58  
sounds like you getting carried away with your experimenting of what you can handle and what you can't.
it is very dangerous to self medicate, and to take this kind of risk, just so to satisfy your curiousity.
be very careful, and consult with your doctor
trying to validate that it is ok to smoke, because there are people who have reached their 80's and 90's and still do, is not a good enough reason.
my dad smoked until the age of 82, and for one year he laid on is death bed critically suffering, until he died, from lung cancer.
i wouldn't wish that on my self, to end my life in such a painful kind of way.
rachel


#12 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:45 PM

(Pupabella @ Aug. 20 2005,15:58)
sounds like you getting carried away with your experimenting of what you can handle and what you can't.
it is very dangerous to self medicate, and to take this kind of risk, just so to satisfy your curiousity.
be very careful, and consult with your doctor
trying to validate that it is ok to smoke, because there are people who have reached their 80's and 90's and still do, is not a good enough reason.
my dad smoked until the age of 82, and for one year he laid on is death bed critically suffering, until he died, from lung cancer.
i wouldn't wish that on my self, to end my life in such a painful kind of way.
rachel


I can relate.  My grandfather, whom I never even met, smoked at least three packs a day and died around the age of 50 due to lung cancer.  And I wasn't trying to validate that it's okay to smoke because some people got lucky and stayed alive for a long time.. that's not what I was saying at all.

He didn't even try to treat it.  Believe me, I've had plenty of deaths in the family because of smoking, but that alone isn't going to kick the habit.  I'll learn to kick it once I get all of my other medications stable.  And you're right about the self-medicating--not good.  I just thought eventually I'd reach a dose where it would affect me, but it did not at all.. and I'm not going to self-medicate anymore, anyway.  I was doing that with urn for a long time.  I simply experimented one night with the valium and had no success.  It's hard to understand how hard it is to keep control when you're a rapid-cycling manic-depressive.  It's hard to deal with and you're often impatient, which is exactly me in a nutshell.


Thanks for the post.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:46 PM

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Posted: Aug. 20 2005,16:22  
Just want you to know I'm thinking of you. I can hear what a difficult time you're having, and I hope you get some relief from the Celexa. Glad to hear you're done with the self-medicating - I was worried about you with that.
Take care, and let us know how you're doing...

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:47 PM

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Posted: Aug. 20 2005,16:42  
Matt,

I hope you are hanging in there while your system adjusts to the changes.  I know how hard it is to figure out the right med combo for any individual.  You and your doctor are working at it, though; that is the best you can do.  Keep searching, and hopefully you'll find really good results soon.  

I don't blame you for wanting to wait to quit smoking until your meds are well-stabilized.  It is a really hard thing to do!  I'm glad you want to quit, and I think you are wise to do the quitting once your mental health is better.  

Hope your weekend is good!  Oh, if you really hate your name we can discuss options via PM....  

Karen

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#15 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:49 PM

(ados @ Aug. 20 2005,17:42)
Oh, if you really hate your name we can discuss options via PM....  :)

Karen


yeah, I'd like that.  This has just been an alias ever since I was ten years old.  I didn't know what to put, and rubbing alcohol was sitting next to me, so I just typed alcohol, and that wasn't available, so I mis-spelled it on purpose to allcoholl.  Yeah, please PM me about the name change, I'd really like that.

thanks.

Matt

#16 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:51 PM

(lizard @ Aug. 20 2005,17:22)
Just want you to know I'm thinking of you. I can hear what a difficult time you're having, and I hope you get some relief from the Celexa. Glad to hear you're done with the self-medicating - I was worried about you with that.
Take care, and let us know how you're doing...


yeah.  I took my prescribed xanax today (he's allowing me to take up to 2 mg 3x a day), and it didn't do anything at all.  the prozac is still in my system and it's getting on my nerves.  I guess I'm just gonna have to wait a good 7 days until MOST of it is out of my system.

I hate waiting, because I am just constantly anxious and worried about absolutely nothing.  I just gotta keep myself busy, I guess, and that's not easy to do when you're 17, already graduated from high school, and work as an intern as an IT assistant for two days a week, and the thing is:  I'm not even used there anymore.  I was for the first few weeks, and then they stopped using me.  I'm an A+ certified professional, now, and they're still not using me.  So when I'm at work, I do NOTHING.  I sit at my desk for 8 hours, sometimes longer, and then leave.  I'm just getting awfully p***** at how things are going right now.  I'm gonna have to deal with awful panic attacks for a whole week.  Horrible anxiety--for a whole week.  Agoraphobia--for a whole week (I had an episode of that today at the mall).  I'm sick of the half-life of medicines.  I wish prozac would just EXIT right away instead of taking 9 1/3 days to get out of the system.  So basically, I'm not depressed simply because the prozac is still in my system.  I'm taking celexa 10 mg and jumping to 20 in three days (that's how he prescribed it.. he wanted to make sure no screwy side-effects came on right away with an immediate strong dose, even though 20 of celexa is 10 of lexapro, and 10 of lexapro worked right away for me, with no side-effects, besides a bit of libido problems, but that's another issue.  I just have to take the celexa so I won't be depressed after the prozac actually gets the hell out of my system.  and I really hope it doesn't **** my motivation, because that's the last thing I need.

please respond.  I need almost constant support here, because I'm frustrated and have been frustrated and will continue to be until the prozac exits my stupid system and I am able to use benzodiazepines with success to **** the anxiety.


that's it for now.




Matt

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:51 PM

Matt,
do you think that perhaps the panic attacks you're having could have anything to do with TAKING the benzos?  

hear me out?

the doctor told me that the benzos have a sort of ping pong effect... that they have a half life (YOU would know more about this than I do)... and because of the way they work, they sort of take you on an ebb and flow sort of ride... up and down and up and down... do you think they're CAUSING the panic to occur?  could THAT be a possibility?

((((((Matt)))


#18 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:52 PM

(I am Cat @ Aug. 20 2005,20:32)
Matt,
do you think that perhaps the panic attacks you're having could have anything to do with TAKING the benzos?  

hear me out?

the doctor told me that the benzos have a sort of ping pong effect... that they have a half life (YOU would know more about this than I do)... and because of the way they work, they sort of take you on an ebb and flow sort of ride... up and down and up and down... do you think they're CAUSING the panic to occur?  could THAT be a possibility?

((((((Matt)))


asked him that already.  the panic attacks were happening before taking the benzo's.  it was helping my panic attacks until I was put on prozac (I was put on xanax before I was put on prozac, so I know what you're suggesting isn't the case.)

I already know how I respond to benzo's and I get what you're saying.  An overdose of a benzo will cause a panic attack or suppress your breathing, one or the other, but the problem is, valium is in my system for another three days, and xanax will be out within the next one or two days, and the prozac will be out in 9.3 days.  Benzo's flat out won't work for me when the prozac is in my system--so what I'm saying is: I'm not taking them for at least 5 days, so the half-life tolerance factor is ruled out.  Today was my last dose of any benzo for at least 5 days.  Maybe 4, I don't know.  I might just make it so I don't take them until the prozac is COMPLETELY excreted and out of my system.  That sounds like a better idea for me.  it's only a few days more.  I guess i'll make it 9 days, then test to see if the benzo's have any effect.  and believe me, I know their effects.  I need high doses, but if they're going to work, then I AM taking them.

your suggestion makes sense, and I already know about that little ping-pong effect you were talking about, but it's definitely not the case.  If it was, then I'd have the panic attack/anxiety AFTER taking the benzo, not BEFORE taking the benzo.  the anxiety and panic always happens due to a trigger that I haven't yet figured out--that and agoraphobia, of which I had an episode today.  Note that I had taken nothing but my celexa when this happened.


respond.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:53 PM

Could it be the Celexa?

#20 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:54 PM

(I am Cat @ Aug. 20 2005,20:44)
Could it be the Celexa?


it very well could be the celexa, but the panic was happening before the celexa.  I just started the celexa today, and I expect good results.  or at least, I hope.  maybe i could try the lexapro again at a lower dosage if the celexa doesn't do it or if it gives me too many side-effects.  I mean after all.. I have a mood-stabilizer so I won't go manic.  I think I just don't give things enough patience.

and now my fiance is p***** at me.  I take her to the mall for two and a half hours, then I take her out to dinner, as promised, then we get home, and suddenly I'm ignoring her because I'm on a forum trying to sort out my medical situation?  this isn't fair to me.  she keeps talking about me not being happy.. well HOW THE HELL am I GOING TO BE HAPPY when I'm being screwed with meds up and down?  I'm constantly anxious, meeting her demands, and now I'm suddenly ignoring her?  she says that all I care about is the computer?


it doesn't make sense.


someone respond. PLEASE.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:54 PM

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Posted: Aug. 21 2005,00:41  
hopefully your med situation will work out, and "God" willing you are going to feel a lot better.
just like you said, it's also a matter of being patient.
take care of yourself
rachel


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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:55 PM

(((((Matt))))))
I can talk to you about your emotional situation if and when you're willing to listen sweetheart.  But remember... it may not be exactly what you want to hear... and it may not be easy to take in...
I'm just wishing for stability in your life, and I'm not sure you're looking in the right places, or to the people who are best suited to give it to you hon.
The hurts me to say... but I'm afraid it may be true...  Sometimes you have to think outside your heart for a little bit when it comes to situations such as yours.  Think with your head too, hon.  You need a stable, supportive partner in your life... to NOT have one, is to create havoc in your emotional foundation.... Can you afford to do that?  If you're experiencing all this emotional upheaval now... imagine what will happen the first time any financial situations arise.   Disaster.  The slightest bit of pressure in the marriage could create a chasm that could never be filled... I suggest you think long and hard before committing yourself to a lifelong bonding between you and someone that cannot support YOU AS MUCH AS YOU SUPPORT HER.  Think about it.  This could be the root of your anxiety.
I only say this because I care about what happens to you.  I always have.

By the way... I'm not saying DON"T get married... I'm just saying, work these things out BEFORE you do.  Otherwise, things could get worse for you.

love and laughter, sweetheart.... love and laughter,
~Mama Cat


#23 Guest_I am Cat_*

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:55 PM

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Posted: Aug. 21 2005,18:25  
I agree with Cat as far as your relationship with your fiancee.  You do not need the stress of her pressuring you; you have enough stress of your own.  If she causes bad feelings in you, maybe you should back off from the relationship a bit, for a while anyway.  Just a thought.

I am wondering what the scoop is with your job.  Why are they just having you do nothing?  Actually, some folks would be happy to get paid for doing nothing...but that is another story.    Obviously you want to be working, to use your skills.  Is there someone you can talk to - a supervision or something - and let them know you want more work?  

Karen

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#24 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 07:59 PM

(I am Cat @ Aug. 21 2005,02:24)
(((((Matt))))))
I can talk to you about your emotional situation if and when you're willing to listen sweetheart.  But remember... it may not be exactly what you want to hear... and it may not be easy to take in...
I'm just wishing for stability in your life, and I'm not sure you're looking in the right places, or to the people who are best suited to give it to you hon.
The hurts me to say... but I'm afraid it may be true...  Sometimes you have to think outside your heart for a little bit when it comes to situations such as yours.  Think with your head too, hon.  You need a stable, supportive partner in your life... to NOT have one, is to create havoc in your emotional foundation.... Can you afford to do that?  If you're experiencing all this emotional upheaval now... imagine what will happen the first time any financial situations arise. ???  Disaster.  The slightest bit of pressure in the marriage could create a chasm that could never be filled... I suggest you think long and hard before committing yourself to a lifelong bonding between you and someone that cannot support YOU AS MUCH AS YOU SUPPORT HER.  Think about it.  This could be the root of your anxiety.
I only say this because I care about what happens to you.  I always have.

By the way... I'm not saying DON"T get married... I'm just saying, work these things out BEFORE you do.  Otherwise, things could get worse for you.

love and laughter, sweetheart.... love and laughter,
~Mama Cat


she was hiding things from me that I hadn't known about.  such as how she feels, her dissociative symptoms, and all of her constant anxiety and nervousness.. constant depression and mind-racing.  similar to bipolar mania symptoms.. but they're constant and don't stop, which means it's just simply heavy anxiety.  the reason we had been fighting was so much was because I wasn't able to comfort her because I didn't recognize how she was feeling until she told me last night. We always fought, and since she enlightened me things seemed to have evened up more, now that I'm able to comfort her.  

we all got it straigtened out, though.  and as far as you mentioning her not comforting me--she is always the one to comfort me.. and I'm normally the one that fails to comfort her.  But that's changing now.

sorry for not giving all the details, once again.  I only gave my side of the story.

I'm currently a little anxious but keeping my mind on computers and watching law and order SVU (I love any law enforcement show except the practice.)

anyway, things are kind of stable right now, even though I feel like crap and I'm still very anxious and upset.  I'm just waiting for the prozac and valium/xanax to get out of my system so I won't have any tolerance and hope these benzo's work once all the prozac, valium, and xanax is out of the system.  The Half-life of valium is so long, up to 100 hours, but I guess that's why it's best for long-term use, because it's easier to taper off of something that stays in your system for up to 4 days and you can take lower doses to slowly and safely taper off.  But I can't use it,  because it doesn't work for me, so klonopin's the next best choice for me.  and if not, then we'll  go to the most addictive of them all: xanax.  that's simply addictive because of its extremely short half life.  It's good for immediate relief, though, and it's hard to grow a tolerance to it unless taken every day.

Sorry for the rambling.

I'll keep you guys posted.  And post as much as you can.. I need some support, still.

#25 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 08:00 PM

(ados @ Aug. 21 2005,19:25)
I am wondering what the scoop is with your job.  Why are they just having you do nothing?  Actually, some folks would be happy to get paid for doing nothing...but that is another story.  :)  Obviously you want to be working, to use your skills.  Is there someone you can talk to - a supervision or something - and let them know you want more work?  

Karen


The whole job thing is just an internship.  I'm not getting paid.  If I was getting paid, I wouldn't care as much.  I'd just be bored and agitated all of the time.  and yes, there are people that I have already asked (my boss) if there was anything I could do, and I had nothing to do, so I ended up just writing up a few tedious test cases for 15 minutes and then spending the remaining 7 hours and 45 minutes sitting there doing nothing.  I could do that with a working benzo all day long, heh.  who knows.. and who cares.  I'm about to quit anyway, because the whole thing got started up cause my dad wanted me to get a job, and he asked if I'd intern at his job.  But now my dad is leaving that job, which means I leave.  

Oh well, at least I'll get my letter of recommendation and get a $20/25 hour job fixing computers.  That's not bad for 17.

and Karen, check your PMs.

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 08:01 PM

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Posted: Aug. 21 2005,18:42  
Oh, I see about the job.  It must be frustrating to waste so much time.  I hope you at least get a good recommendation for the time you are putting in!

Matt - check YOUR PMs  

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#27 mgarbes

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Posted 21 August 2005 - 08:01 PM

(ados @ Aug. 21 2005,19:42)
Oh, I see about the job.  It must be frustrating to waste so much time.  I hope you at least get a good recommendation for the time you are putting in!

Matt - check YOUR PMs  :)


got it

#28 ados

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Posted 22 August 2005 - 02:16 PM

How are you feeling today, Matt?  :)
Life is hard, but God is good.

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#29 Guest_I am Cat_*

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Posted 22 August 2005 - 05:45 PM

That's what I was wondering also, (((((Matt))))).




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