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Guest kwilli0

Quitting College

8 posts in this topic

Posted

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Ok, here's the situation:

I was doing my honours undergraduate degree and got halfway through my undergrad thesis when the depression really hit bad. I took a leave of absence from my thesis (have to complete by May 2007). Went and did a post-grad certificate this year but it wasn't very academically challenging. Now I have to decide if I'll go back to finish my thesis. I have a BA, but this would give me a Honours BA. My family wants me to go back and I want to go back BUT I feel totally overwhelmed every time I think about it. The bottom line is I don't think I can do it. Realistically I'm not up for it no matter what I want.

The problem is that I feel so guilty and ashamed about quitting. I know that I can always go back and that if I had a physical illness people wouldn't question it. But I still feel like I'm letting myself and my family down.

Has anyone else had a similar experience? How can I come to terms with my limitations? I don't know who else can understand this situation...

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Posted

I guess a big part of your thought pattern can also be put down to the depression.

I know its hard to make decisions and see the bigger picture when we're already feeling down and overwhelemed. But you have to remember that you can always go back to college and finish your honours later on, i know they allow that here, unsure about how things work where you are?

Why not go back and see how things go? Give yourself some time to adapt back into study but give yourself some leway as well.

Hang in there, things will work out for you.

SO6

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Posted

Oh yes, I know about the guilt and shame and letting down feelings.

But, I think you should do what you feel is right.

Maybe you can do it little by little?

Does anyone out there have the ability to help you with it?

Not in writing I mean, more like emotional support?

I had a breakdown while writing my thesis, but I made it thru.

Im now completing other tasks as well and taking it little at a time.

:hearts:

Evin

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Posted

I'm presently writing a dissertation for a BA Hons. I've just started, but I already have a sense of impending doom, so I have some idea of what it's like.

I think that if you quit, you ought to do so as thoroughly as possible

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Posted

I know the exact feeling. I took all of my coursework and passed my PhD exams, but I have never tackled the Dissertation. All of those years of hard work and success, and I just quit. One of the hardest parts is trying to explain it to other people. They always ask me why I don't just go back. The truth (although laden with tons of guilt) is that I simply don't want to. I have a good career in my field and life is pretty okay. Status quo works for me. I don't really feel like going backwards. So... my advice is to follow your heart. If the stress of going back and finishing is just overwhelming, focus on the future and the positive. The guilt will still strike now and then, but at least you will have taken control of your own life and followed your own heart. If you think that you can get back into the swing of things, go ahead and try again, but please don't put too much pressure on yourself.

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Posted

Here's a few alternatives that you could do for yourself right now. Talk to your Academic Advisor regarding your classes and the difficulty you're having to get through them. This may result in getting an extension on the due date of your thesis and that could help you. If you need a third party to speak with about your feelings, go to your campus student health center and ask to see a counselor or therapist. You will surely get some good feedback with any of these options.

As far as quitting college, you may take a leave of absence for a semester or a year to help yourself. I realize there is a lot of stress related to college academics (I've been there, too), but if you desire to graduate, you always can go back. It's not a shame to quit when you're not up to the daily challenges. You may let yourself down a bit but you can always bounce back. Don't feel guilty about whatever you decide to do. It isn't worth it and it makes you feel miserable.

Whatever you decide to do, we will be here to give you support.

Sheepwoman :hearts:

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Posted

If you want to do a Master's or any kind of post grad work, then yeah, an Honours designation is important...it will help...but if you don't want those things, it is pretty much a waste of time. I just have a general B.A...if you just want to work when you are finished school, that is all you need.

This is about YOU. Not your family. A B.A. is a major accomplishment. If you don't want the honours, don't do it. The question is, what do you really want?

Misfit

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Posted

I agree with what everyone has said. You should be PROUD that you have accomplished so much in your college career! I am only a second semester freshman, and I long to be where you are. I know what it is like to be battling depression while attending school- and the impact it can have on your ability to get things done on time. Dont be ashamed or feel guilty if you decide that your honors degree isnt something that you want. As stated earlier- what you get out of your education is for you, and you only.

-SadSunDevil

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