Posted 20 March 2007 - 11:29 PM
I was doing my honours undergraduate degree and got halfway through my undergrad thesis when the depression really hit bad. I took a leave of absence from my thesis (have to complete by May 2007). Went and did a post-grad certificate this year but it wasn't very academically challenging. Now I have to decide if I'll go back to finish my thesis. I have a BA, but this would give me a Honours BA. My family wants me to go back and I want to go back BUT I feel totally overwhelmed every time I think about it. The bottom line is I don't think I can do it. Realistically I'm not up for it no matter what I want.
The problem is that I feel so guilty and ashamed about quitting. I know that I can always go back and that if I had a physical illness people wouldn't question it. But I still feel like I'm letting myself and my family down.
Has anyone else had a similar experience? How can I come to terms with my limitations? I don't know who else can understand this situation...
Posted 21 March 2007 - 01:52 AM
I know its hard to make decisions and see the bigger picture when we're already feeling down and overwhelemed. But you have to remember that you can always go back to college and finish your honours later on, i know they allow that here, unsure about how things work where you are?
Why not go back and see how things go? Give yourself some time to adapt back into study but give yourself some leway as well.
Hang in there, things will work out for you.
So love the people who treat you right.
Forget about the ones who don't.
Believe everything happens for a reason.
If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands.
If it changes your life, let it.
Nobody said life would be easy....
they just promised itd be worth it.
Posted 21 March 2007 - 04:41 AM
But, I think you should do what you feel is right.
Maybe you can do it little by little?
Does anyone out there have the ability to help you with it?
Not in writing I mean, more like emotional support?
I had a breakdown while writing my thesis, but I made it thru.
Im now completing other tasks as well and taking it little at a time.
--- Kahlil Gibran
You have to be strong. Strength of heart will carry you through the hardest of trials.
Posted 21 March 2007 - 04:56 AM
I think that if you quit, you ought to do so as thoroughly as possible – no lingering guilt or shame, just cut your ties with it completely. Give yourself a complete break and the time to get better. I know that it may be difficult to overcome those feelings. Just remember that the reason you quit was because you needed to get better and that those feelings of guilt and shame aren't helping.
Alternately, you could tackle the challenge and give it your all, taking it day by day.
It's up to you which of these options is best. If it's a real challenge, or if it's simply not possible right now is your call.
I think the worst possible situation is to get stuck between those two options. To quit on paper, but to do so with guilt and shame. It doesn't sound as though you're using your depression as an excuse, so there is nothing to be ashamed of. You're not letting people down by taking care of yourself. Just do the best that you can.
Posted 21 March 2007 - 08:59 AM
Posted 21 March 2007 - 09:46 AM
As far as quitting college, you may take a leave of absence for a semester or a year to help yourself. I realize there is a lot of stress related to college academics (I've been there, too), but if you desire to graduate, you always can go back. It's not a shame to quit when you're not up to the daily challenges. You may let yourself down a bit but you can always bounce back. Don't feel guilty about whatever you decide to do. It isn't worth it and it makes you feel miserable.
Whatever you decide to do, we will be here to give you support.
God will give you no more than you can handle. This is all a test to see if you are really ready for the good things that are going to come your way. All this pain is going to come back and make me stronger.-Clarence Clemmons 1942-2011
Everything I know, I know because I love. Leo Tolstoy War and Peace
Posted 21 March 2007 - 10:06 AM
This is about YOU. Not your family. A B.A. is a major accomplishment. If you don't want the honours, don't do it. The question is, what do you really want?
Posted 21 March 2007 - 02:25 PM
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