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What My Depression Has Cost Me (Preface)

Posted by adamrparr in Life: Depression, Addiction, Sobriety, Victory & Defeat - An Ongoing Story, 27 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

Let me preface this by saying that I'm not about to write all of this because I want to wallow in self-pity. And I am most certainly not trying to bring anyone down.  I'm doing this because it's high time that I take an honest look at what my depression has cost me, and those I love.  I hope to gain a little perspective through this endeavor....


Ghost Stuff

Posted by T on C in T on C's stuff, 25 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

Serious post.I opened the door to the basement to let it air a little. Started to see vapours rising from down there. TBC
Later :cat_jumps:
Yep, it's visual disturbances...it's got a weird feeling down there tho.


Im Failing At "self Help"

Posted by allalone6 in allalone6's Blog, 25 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

Im trying so hard to defeat it, but cant seem to stay afloat. I dont like myself and am constantly putting myself down. Only occasionally i catch it and try to do damage control.

I do my best to fake "okness" although I know my quitness is coming off as "grumpiness"

I try hard to fight the insomnia and on the days I just want to sleep, I make sure t...


Dream: Trapeze, Comic Strip

Posted by Hertz in Almost Random, 25 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

I'm looking at a comic strip, like the ones in newspapers. It's made of a single panel. On top, I there is a woman who is about to catch a man who is coming towards her on a trapeze. Below, there is a man doing the same thing as her, with another man on another trapeze. There is a thought balloon above her head. She is thinking that the man beside her is...


Disability Extension Requested

Posted by Shmooey in Shmooey's Fort, 22 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

So I had a reprieve when my pdoc entered March 1 as my back to work date.  But I'm nowhere near ready to return.  My tdoc has taken over the paperwork since I see him more than I do her.  He submitted an extension to June 1 last week.  I'm really hoping it comes through because I am not in any shape to try to work and I would hate to w...


Last Straw

Posted by in the shadows in in the shadows' Blog, 22 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

I am still getting sick from the meds, the vomiting and fevers, and weakness are still hitting me, but I am hoping that I will adjust to them soon,
and hoping they will fight the infection and work, They have to , I am running out of other pills to try, and I just cant take this much longer,
I am becoming homeward bound it seems, not going out and walking...



Posted by 20YearsandCounting in 20YearsandCounting's Blog, 21 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

Crucible A secondary definition for crucible is 'a place or occasion of severe test or trial.'  My crucible last night and most of this morning was pain.  I could have sworn I was in the beginnings of a heart attack, but apparently it was a badly pinched nerve somewhere in my upper back.  I took a tylenol and a couple of ibuprofen and sat in my spou...


Side Effects

Posted by DustyRoad in Dusty's Place, 20 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

From my home in central New Jersey, the turnpike and I-195 run north and south, and east and west respectively. I'm able to travel the pike from the surrounding flat corn fields to one of either two big cities on the east coast or jump on 195 east, to the enjoy the bay and beaches or head west to the quietness of country mountains. It's a fun place to liv...



Posted by buttermybiscuit in buttermybiscuit's Blog, 20 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

So, as always, the people I choose to admire turn out to be some of the most messed up people around. This hurts because I relate to these people for a reason--I'm just like them, have the same flaws, the same weaknesses, the same *horrid* personalities, but yet I think they're defendable, because, well, I'm bad, but I'm not *that* bad, am I?

Right now I...


Valentines Day

Posted by Steel_Wolf in Steel_Wolf's Blog, 14 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

I think that the entire concept of actually having someone in your life, who cares for you, who knows you, who you can let it all out to, who you can hold and will hold you.... its got me really depressed cause i don't think ill ever find someone like that.
damn valentines day.
I want a hug. =(
give someone you know a hu...


Lonely And Bored

Posted by qwerty21 in qwerty21's Blog, 13 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

I would like to be with someone, but I'm inside all the time cos I'm sick so it's impossible to meet new people. Also I'm really bored, I mean I just get the temporary sick benefit and I spend all my time online or playing a computer game. It's horrible, what am I gonna do with my life?
I still have some hope that my ex-gf will visit her...



Posted by Maverick7777 in Maverick7777's Blog, 11 February 2015 - * * * * * · 0 views

an african proverb - 
every morning in africa an antelope wakes up.
it knows it must outrun the fastest lion - or it will be killed.
every morning in africa a lion wakes up.
It knows it must run faster than the slowest antelope - or it will starve.
it does not matter if you are a lion or the antelope - when the sun comes up you h...


You're Already Dead

Posted by apple_bloom in apple_bloom's Blog, 11 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

"That's one deep, dark nothing you got there. Can't fill it, can you? Not with food or drink. Not even with sex. Oh, you can smirk and joke and lie to yourself, but not to me! I can see inside you. I can see how broken you are, how defeated. You can't win, and you know it. But you just keep fighting. Just... keep going through the motions. You're not hung...


No Motivation

Posted by duck in duck's Blog, 11 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

Another day ahead in this pathetic world.  I slept most of Tuesday and woke up at 2 am full of energy.  This is not going well. Earlier in the evening a friend called me to meet him for coffee but I  had to turn him down because I was do tired.
This Friday I have an appointment with my psychologist however, I am thinking of cancellin...


Today Was A Meh Day :/ So Here's An Amusing Picture Of A Dog

Posted by fleecyfleece in fleecyfleece's Daily blather, 05 February 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

I was relatively productive yesterday, i got up and did stuff
Today i didnt :( i overslept till about 12 so i didnt make it into college today, but im trying to make up for that by catching up on all the work i havnt done.
I feel ill too, ive a sore throat and blood in my spit
And im in dire need of a shower, i havnt showered properly since last friday, t...


I Want To Date

Posted by justaguy13 in justaguy13's Blog, 31 January 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

I really really want to go on a date. I don't even really mind who it is with. There is a girl at work I would like to get to know more, but she is kind of my boss and is not interested in me at all, as usual. I want to feel like a man, like an adult, and go on a date with someone. Just take them out for a meal, or a drink, or go to the cinema. I want to...


I Don't Know If I Can Stay At My Current Job

Posted by No1Cares in My Venting Place, 29 January 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

It's so toxic I just can't explain. If I don't get a call for at least the testing for the job I mentioned in my previous post, I don't know what I'll do. And I know the odds are stacked against me being hired, but I keep trying to be positive about it. I keep telling myself that if I make it to the interview stage, if I can nail that, I've got half a cha...


A Break In Play

Posted by thinkpositive in thinkpositive's Blog, 29 January 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

So it was a bad day earlier. A culmination of an agrument with the fiancee and general life events. However it is the evening and things are not manic.
I know this is forum is about depression but seeing as this blog is something I will probably be re-reading I thought I might tell my future self about some good things too. Why the change? Well I g...


Just Jabbering

Posted by JaLee in JaLee, 24 January 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

I realized somethig yesterday that really bothers me. What if I go through therapy and get past all the horrible things from my past, and I am still depresed, paranoid and neurotic? If my brain doesn't make the right chemicals, is it because I obsess over my past or is it because my brain is defective. I was thinking once I got through therapy I would be...


Poem Time!!!

Posted by bellbottoms in bellbottoms' Blog, 22 January 2015 - - - - - - · 0 views

Does anyone care
For some grated Gruyére?
I'm just a piece of cheese
For you to slice as you please
One for my sister
One for my brother
The damage is done
What harm is another?

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