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First Day Of Social Life

Posted by chucapabra in chucapabra's Blog, 02 September 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

its was a nice day today. maybe for that rude b*tch well a new thing to ruminate on.
 
well I took my app and I kinda regret it. had to give my adress so they can open a account. and had to provide a number. I gave my cell. but there is no voicemail I guess ill call when the person call and its a social worker who gonna call me to ask question then w...

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Suicide

Posted by allalone6 in allalone6's Blog, 02 September 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

a rubber hose and some duct tape would be all it takes. I think about it constantly.
 
I dread getting out of bed daily and starting my day...heading to an office where I am disliked and treated like im invisible for 8 hrs and then back home.
 
only my parents would suffer with my decision. I dont want to hurt them, but in the same breath im so...

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My Light Is Dark

Posted by maxedgrace in maxedgrace's Blog, 01 September 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Words cannot express the deep nothingness I feel.  Rather I feel something, it’s all bad, it’s all depression.  It’s all dark, sad, angry and scary.  It’s all nothing I want anyone else to ever see in me, on me, consuming me.  I’d rather you all see me sleep.  Not that I escape it when I sleep, it...

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Mixed Up

Posted by 20YearsandCounting in 20YearsandCounting's Blog, 30 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Mixed Up I've learned there's a difference between intellectual knowledge and emotional realization.  Intellectually, I've known for years that I bury my tears and thin-skinned tendencies underneath an angry & intense facade I refer to as 'The B*tch'.  In the past, I've had too many people react to my tears and depression with sneers and criticism in...

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Scared To Go On Lithium

Posted by Lady Mozzer in Lady Mozzer`s Rollercoaster Ride, 29 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I saw the p doc today.Which was really hard in the first place because I always get nervous when I have to see him.It`s not because of him or anything (he`s really nice). It`s because of my I really get nervous when I have to talk to other people and leave the house. Well anyway we discussed my not sleeping and anxiety.He tells me he wants me to try lithi...

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My Mind Poured Onto Paper

Posted by MrMisery in Coming Back To Life, 28 August 2014 - * * * * * · 0 views

I've been worrying and worrying, and worrying some more. About everything. All of the things that could go wrong.
The worst of the worst, and nothing else was allowed to occupy any space in my mind.
 
Finally a thought that's lingered in a hidden space way back in the distance has found some light and improved my perspective.
 
 
 
Cal...

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Tears Of A Clown (Possible Trigger....mentions Robin Williams.)

Posted by cjay in Help Is On The Way, 28 August 2014 - * * * * * · 0 views

Tears Of A Clown (Possible Trigger....mentions Robin Williams.) The discussion about Robin Williams goes on and on. And rightly so. When the Motion Picture Academy wrote "You're free, Genie," in tribute to a favorite son, it opened up a much-needed discussion on the topic of mental illness and the tragic results of it going untreated.  The sane among us say,

"Suicide is NOT freedom. Suicide is death."

Th...

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Self: Rebooted

Posted by Hertz in Almost Random, 28 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Steven is not satisfied with his life and he blames it on his past. His past is terrible. He made mistake after mistake. He learned from them, but now he's old and full of regrets. He wishes he could go back to being ten years old, but keep his present mind, so that with his experience he could avoid the pitfalls and make the right choices.
The next morni...


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Constant Thoughts

Posted by justaguy13 in justaguy13's Blog, 27 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

This past week I haven't been able to stop thinking about ******* myself. I've had thoughts like this for years but this is the longest I have thought about it without a break. I've been utterly miserable, totally isolated and I feel like I've got nothing to live for. I can't stop thinking about how terrible I am and how terrible my life is. How even the...

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My Journey

Posted by brenn19832 in A Nice Place you Have Here, 21 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

My Journey Hello there, readers. 
 
I have been journeying without a map and without any support for a journey that had no name.  Until yesterday.
 
Yesterday was a big day for me.  After years of therapy, medications, false starts, and much self-hatred, I finally found the Right Doctor.  I found her by luck, by doing a search on the...

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Physically Sick Tonight

Posted by in the shadows in in the shadows' Blog, 18 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Another night of fevers and chills. this can get frustrating, I toss and turn trying to get comfy but I cant, its when this happens that I feel like throwing in the towel
its constant, the fevers may go but they will return I am ignoring the body aches as much as I can, I feel I am falling apart at times,  holding on to the hopes and dreams...

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Opened Up.

Posted by Steel_Wolf in Steel_Wolf's Blog, 17 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I did it. I talked. It all came out. My mom was mad cause I looked at her wrong, and I broke. It was hard, and we talked for hours. My head hurts now... But things are going to get better. While talking, I learned something about my family. Depression isn't uncommon. My mom has it, my dad has it, my brother may have it... What hell, huh? One big, happy fa...

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Stuck

Posted by jackotheshadow in jackotheshadow's Blog, 17 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I've been depressed for several years. I've been suicidal for most of it. In the last few years, I've been losing touch with everyone and everything. This was probably happening in the first place (perhaps one of the reasons I got depressed in the first place), but it's been getting more severe. More specifically, I've spent the last couple years avoiding...

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Stop This Madness, I Want Out

Posted by Shmooey in Shmooey's Fort, 16 August 2014 - * * * * * · 0 views

So after gaining 89 pounds between Geodon and Abilify over the course of a year and a half, I stopped taking Abilify three weeks ago (had already been off Geodon for nine months).  Got Abilify withdrawals, got through it, though not without key people at work now knowing my mental illness (except the DID). Switched successfully back to Haldol which h...

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I'm Ok, You're Ok. No, Really... !!!

Posted by RatBoy in RatBoy's Blog, 14 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Hi!
 
Just want to reiterate something I've said, and others have said in many different ways before.
 
I was MADE this way.  I wasn't born depressed.  It's not inherent to my nature.  This is not a birth defect.
 
Circumstances have made me depressed.
 
Now, YMMV - there may be some folks out there with genuine innate i...

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I Miss You So Much Right Now

Posted by Lucciainthesky in Lucciainthesky's Blog, 10 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I'm having one of those nights when I miss my ex so much more than I can ever say.
Sometimes when I watch something that we both enjoyed, or hear a song that always reminded me of him, it crushes me.
He was the best thing to ever happen to me. He was always there for me when I needed him. he helpedpushme through so many miserable times and tough st...

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I Want And Don't Want At The Same Time

Posted by lia_domingues in An attempt to shine, 08 August 2014 - * * * * * · 0 views

yes, I want to write something but at the same time I don't want to. This is how I feel everyday. Always in the middle. I am like that normally but depressed is even worse. However, I am saying I am like that... I should have said I used to be like that.
 
I just want some freedom from my disease. I think that's all we all want. And I don't think tha...

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Life Is Boring

Posted by qwerty21 in qwerty21's Blog, 08 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Hi,
 
I was in the hospital for a few days. My time there was fine. I just lied in bed and watched tv. Now I'm back at home. I feel like I have nothing to do.

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Past Few Weeks

Posted by Bunlip in Bunlip's Blog, 06 August 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Well my emotions are a wreck. Feeling good but awful. I completely hate it.
Anyways the good things that happened the last few weeks
-found new bands to listen to
-even a whole genre
-been out of bed
-friends
The bad
-emotionally drained
-sore for no reason
-tried minor self harm, liked it, still doing it
-lying to friends about my problems(specially the...



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