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Blogs



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And Then There Were Four...

Posted by rainingviolets in rainingviolets' Blog, 29 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

And then there were four…
 
Somewhere in the dark depths of my repressed memories are the reasons I think and feel the way I do about many things in life. Sometimes, but not often, an unexpected and usually unwelcome glimpse into the past will uncover some of those reasons. For example, a flashback not long ago made me realize that the reaso...

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If I Was To Go Away...they Would All Cheer!

Posted by allalone6 in allalone6's Blog, 28 October 2014 - * * * * * · 0 views

I honestly feel like the whole world hates me. 
 
I dont think highly of myself either, never really have. I second guess everything and often questions peoples intentions towards me. lately ive been trying to ultra focus on exercise and running a 5k just to try to save my mind from the constant battering. i suck at running so this wa...

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Bonnet, Bloomers, Bustle And Bust

Posted by Gisèle in Gisèle's, 28 October 2014 - * * * * * · 0 views

While I was away convalescing and hating the world, I missed my birthday. And, since theyre a day apart, Alex's too. The girls bought in a little cake Im told they helped make and the three of us blew out the candles. It was very, very sweet just as there is something very, very wrong about losing a birthday to a hospital ward.

It was especially galling...

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New At This.

Posted by mama_phoenix in mama_phoenix's Blog, 27 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I am 23 years old... I have two sons the oldest is 3 and the youngest is 1. I am married to the father and I should be happy. I am most days but not always. I mean we do have a roof over our head and clothes on our back and food in our stomachs.  But it's my past that keeps bothering me. I'm tired of people that keep telling me "to just get over it"....

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Depression's Evil Twin

Posted by cjay in Help Is On The Way, 27 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I am full fuLL FULL  of anxiety right now. It all started when I took a nap.
 
I cannot take naps in any old environment. I must have my eye scarf and a good piece of audio. For today's nap I chose "Solving the Procrastination Puzzle"  by Timothy A. Pychyl .  Although it was a good book, perhaps it was a bad choic...

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Mmpi Test

Posted by duck in duck's Blog, 27 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I saw my therapist last Friday and he had me do the MMPI test. I have been seeing this therapist since June and I think he was misled by the Rapid Assessment psychiatrist I saw last April who stated I needed CBT.    So far CBT and the workbook Mind Over Mood has not worked.   My therapist decided we should start over from scratch by doing t...

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Thought It Would Help

Posted by No1Cares in Why Bother?, 26 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Feeling down today. Tried to keep my mind busy by shopping and finding things online that are interesting. It only helped for a bit. Watching The Walking Dead helped also, but now I'm laying in bed and it's hitting me again. So I came here and it's making it A LOT worse. I thought it would help. Give me some help/inspiration on how to stop this. I'm findi...

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The Sins Of My Father's Son

Posted by MrMisery in Coming Back To Life, 26 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I've been doing really well. I've found new direction, I've made a lot of positive changes and stopped every single self destructive tendency that I'd previously made habit.
 
Things are great. Work is actually good, and my social life is suddenly fun and fulfilling.
 
I woke up this morning and actually felt on top of the world. There's not rea...

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Back In The Dark

Posted by chickapea in chickapea's Blog, 25 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I'm back in that dark place. My thinking is halting and stilted.
 
I feel alone. Frustrated. This has been coming for weeks. My GP asks me what I want to do. I just want it to stop. My head hurts in ways that I can't explain. I need hugs. Lots of hugs. I need to be held and comforted and I can't tell you why. I don't want to show anyone the depths of...

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Hate

Posted by Seuss in Seuss' Blog, 22 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Longer than I can remember I've always been the good guy, always striving to take the high road.  I've always put others first and all they've done for me is slip another knife in my back.  It wasn't until I met my now girlfriend(my future wife)that I truly felt loved, felt like I didn't have to be anything but myself.  What an amazing real...

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Break-Up

Posted by qwerty21 in qwerty21's Blog, 22 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

So my gf left me to be with another guy. I cut myself so that it bled a tiny bit, but still very superficial. Might develop a scar though. I just see no point in living. I might cut myself again and maybe strike a major artery, not likely though. She told me she'd be my friend still, and I actually maybe do want that. I just want someone to be with me, no...

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Weary

Posted by in the shadows in in the shadows' Blog, 20 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I am becoming weary, here i am with another cold , my immune system is shot, and i catch whatever is going around,
i started feeling sick yesterday, and this morning i got up with a fever and headache, and now a sore throat, i  am so tired
of being ill or having some issue with my health, i ask myself why take the HIV pills, it doesn't seem to b...

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Failing School

Posted by law055car in law055car's Blog, 19 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

So this past summer I put ally into daycare at the age of 13 and she can not be left alone. Its been a up and down summer I see she is getting better but she still lies to me and I don't fully trust her. I am sick of hearing I'm sorry and nothing changes. She spent a weekend at DYR its a horse ranch and then a month latter we went there for a mother daugh...

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Dream: Martial Arts, Boots

Posted by Hertz in Almost Random, 17 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Part 1: I'm drinking with family and friends. I'm feeling a little bit drunk. As I'm leaving I kiss my mom on the cheeks, but her coldness makes me feel uneasy. I exit the house and approach a car where three people are sitting, almost ready to leave. One of them is an old friend of mine. They are in a good mood. I tell them about the party. They tell me...

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A Poem

Posted by 20YearsandCounting in 20YearsandCounting's Blog, 16 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

A Poem when it rots my bones
the pattern is beautiful
and takes your breath away

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The Ish Hit The Fan

Posted by JellyBear1360 in Another Day In Paradise, 15 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Its been a terrible year so far! As well as dealing with my own crappy opinion of myself, the breakdown of my relationship and the fact that I'm getting nowhere in life...I've also had to cope with my dear uncles death and health issues coming to a head.
 
But today....(this is going to be a massive ramble and most likely a mess! I'm not in the best...

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Kali Is Sleeping

Posted by T on C in T on C's stuff, 15 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Since I'm another newly adopted human trying to add an entry to a well worn blog...she's walking on the keyboard with that "so what, I'm superior" look that those of us who have seen many times. Then she crashes on the robe near the bed.
Gotta start this with some humor. The rest is sad.
 
Ever known someone who is starcrossed? Bad luck at every bend...

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Joining The Forums

Posted by Turbo in Turbo's Blog, 09 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Yesterday was my first day on the depression forums. It was quite the experience, given that I've only met one other person who acknowledged that they were depressed.

It is amazing and reassuring to me to see so many people who share the same illness as I do. I don't mean it to be amazing in a way that's like "oh cool! I'm so glad all these people are de...

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My Own Worst Enemy

Posted by apple_bloom in apple_bloom's Blog, 09 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

It wasn't supposed to be this way. It was supposed to be a clean slate. I was supposed to get the life I wanted for myself. No red tape, no exceptions. No more having my life dictated to me by what other people want and need. No more relying on other people to do what I should be doing for myself. No more being trapped.

I failed. Plain and simple. I fai...

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10/8/2014

Posted by Ediskrad in Ediskrad's Blog, 08 October 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

Every day I become a little less visible. I haven't even found any support here so I feel stupid posting on the forums anymore.
 
I feel like crying randomly throughout the day but hold it in until I go home. Then I cry in the car. Until my fiance gets home, I cry some more when the urge arises. I'm tired, my jaw is clenching again - a sure sign that...



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