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T on C's stuff



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Hail The Kitty

Posted by T on C , in thankful, Therapy, New start 28 January 2013 - - - - - - · 119 views

Sitting here at 2 AM, the cat's stretched across my lap as I type....I'm amazed as how much he's grown in 7 months. Pure purr....a few stretches and he's back asleep again after looking up at me with those green eyes. Man, I wish I had the life! Yeah, been a while. I've been in a dark place with 3 hospital stays as I cannot seem to get out of th...


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Turning Once Again

Posted by T on C , in thankful, SSDI 14 January 2013 - - - - - - · 157 views

Life is weird.2 years ago I was out of it, then after a lot of steps-and drawbacks I'm going back in. Still couch surfing here with a sporadic net connection, going through the lithium fun, becoming a recluse for 2 months...I'm ready to break into the world once again. I received my SSDI settlement today! Went next door to the local credit union and opene...


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Good News Again!

Posted by T on C , in thankful, Meds, New start 17 November 2012 - - - - - - · 114 views

Wow, it took the Judge one week to render a decision on my case-and I was given SSDI benefits. How I found out so early was my Attorney went online and saw the judgement, called me the next day with the good news. Now it's plan time as next week the home where I'm staying will open for homeless women to have a place to stay during the winter months....


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The Latest

Posted by T on C , in Uncategorized, side effects, thankful, Homeless 07 November 2012 - - - - - - · 138 views

OK, forgive me for wearing flip flops and socks but it's in the 40's here...
Still at the homeless house and waiting on the green light for a move in to the Victorian. I have 2 weeks here and then it's back to the homeless shelter, hope the sec 8 kicks in!

I'm on Lithium now. 900mg a day, with blood tests to make sure I'm not going...


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Zoloft Side Effects

Posted by T on C , in side effects, Zoloft 30 September 2012 - - - - - - · 219 views

My Pdoc increased the Zoloft dosage to 125, and then 150 mg within a few days. So I'm sitting here watching the 'Hawks play while sweating.

From what I've been told this is a common side effect but come on now-the temps in the 50's up here so it cannot be attributed to the weather. I'm not flipping out about anything as the voices are...


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Fog

Posted by T on C , in side effects, voices in the head, Meds, Flashbacks, PTSD, Zyprexa, Zoloft 29 September 2012 - - - - - - · 96 views

Sitting here watching the fog roll in-it's eerie how it seems to cover everything in its mist. At times the sun peeps through, but that only lasts a minute or so and back to grey.
Sort of like my moods...at times I'm on top of the world, then go into a brain fog which darkens my outlook, life and everything around me.

I had many flashback...


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Being Kind To Myself

Posted by T on C , in voices in the head, New start 28 September 2012 - - - - - - · 138 views

Back from therapy, I've been having dissociation all day so it was pretty difficult to keep our conversation on track. One thing she told me was that I needed to be kind to myself. Easier said than done...I'm still beating up my brain for becoming a mess this past year. Sure, I trudge on, but at times it seems that I'm just running around in...


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Back To The Er

Posted by T on C , in Panic attack, Olanzapine, PTSD, voices in the head 26 September 2012 - - - - - - · 157 views

I'm back from the ER. Been a long day, that's for sure. It all started this morning when I started having full blown audible voices telling me to do bad things to myself, a bit like what happened about a year ago when this whole mess started. So I headed into the ER, called the MHP and we talked for a while trying to sort it all out, and figure what...


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Finally Some Good News!

Posted by T on C , in New start, thankful, voices in the head, Zoloft, Zyprexa 07 September 2012 - - - - - - · 169 views

Bring on October. I move into the Victorian on the 1st, yeah! No more shelter or worrying about who's sleeping next to me-I'll be all by myself, safe and out of the elements in my own 1 br apartment. Nice place, went to see it yesterday and picked out the room. Large as well, around 750 sq feet-although I don't have any furniture...


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Fanapt Poop Out

Posted by T on C , in Fanapt, Bipolar 1, voices in the head, Zoloft 23 August 2012 - - - - - - · 106 views

Yep, another Antipsychotic has gone belly up, this time I was on Fanapt which did nothing but make me sick and dizzy, no matter what dosage and time I took it. At least the Zoloft bump up to 100mg was pretty painless these past few weeks. I just have to find something out there to quiet the crowd noise...it comes and goes and when I spin down then the loud...


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Grey Days Of Summer

Posted by T on C , in Zoloft, Panic attack, Uncategorized 07 August 2012 - - - - - - · 126 views

I've been off for a week now due to a spin down. I woke up one AM with panic attacks, and that led to a rerun of what I was going through months ago with a dark, dark mood  leaving me wanting to hide from life.
Another med switch, now I'm on Fanapt (iloperidone)-a newer atypical anti-psychotic which the pdoc pulled out of the med room for me to...


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Onto Latuda

Posted by T on C , in Latuda, Bipolar 1, voices in the head, Zoloft 27 July 2012 - - - - - - · 208 views

Along with the Zoloft I'm now on Latuda due to the Zyprexa weight gain (20 pounds in a month). So far so good, no side effects at all, it's like I just jumped the hoop flawlessly from one to another. Voices? Yes, but they're a bit more muted than earlier. One downer is I've been in a bad mood for the last few days due to trouble with friends...


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Pm Musings

Posted by T on C , in CPAP, Relaxation, Celexa, Zoloft 17 July 2012 - - - - - - · 134 views

Roomies snoring on the couch. Coyotes are baying, trying for a meet up I bet. I just got back from a meditation yoga class where I, for a brief time left myself and floated around for a while while listening to a chime. The instructor is awesome. Life is good.
On the med front, Zoloft is being nice, and the Celexa ramp down the same. Supposedly I'm...


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Voices Gone Again-Whisper Time In The Head

Posted by T on C , in thankful, Zoloft, Zyprexa 12 July 2012 - - - - - - · 146 views

SInce I stopped the Abilify and went back on Zyprexa the voices have dimmed to a light crowd noise instead of the full fledged hallucinations I was having.
Now let's see if the Zyprexa does it's thing for a longer period...along with the addition of Zoloft maybe it'll be a good combo. Another try at rolling the dice, whooo...

Had a meeting with...


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Zoloft Upcoming

Posted by T on C , in Bipolar 1, Celexa, Flashbacks, Meds, voices in the head, Zyprexa 06 July 2012 - - - - - - · 158 views

After the Abilify gave me major insomnia, I'm back on Zypreza for the audible hallucaiations and going to tier off of Celexa and go on Zoloft. Starting to wonder how many meds I'm going to try before I find the magic pill?
Also have been taking Ambien for the insomnia. Works well with no hangover effect like the other sleep meds I've tried and...


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Oh Dem Voices

Posted by T on C , in Uncategorized, Bipolar 1, insomnia, Nightmares, PTSD, Zyprexa 20 June 2012 - - - - - - · 204 views

Voices are back. This one is a comical lady who sings from one ear to another...so tomorrow I'm going to puzzle the pdoc with my report of them starting up again. You'd figure between the Zyprexa and Abilify I'd be even but nope, not happening. Maybe it's time to try something else, there's a lot of Antipsychotics out there just waiting...


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Learning To Love Yourself

Posted by T on C , in Therapy, Grief consoling, thankful 12 June 2012 - - - - - - · 185 views

Helping the roommates move out today, I still have a week or so until I move (hopefully) into my new digs and I'm going to be all alone after tonight.  Finally peace and quiet.
Earlier today I had another phone interview with the social worker who took my info for the upcoming SSI hearing in front of a judge. 12 to 16 months from now...I meet with my...


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Today's Humor

Posted by T on C , in New start, Nonsense posting, Roommates 07 June 2012 - - - - - - · 195 views

On a more comical  note, the other people here have been hoarding stuff for the upcoming move. There's one spoon, one fork and a cheese slicer to eat with which makes for much humor when you have 4 people trying to dine at the same time. Pots and pans have vanished, along with the toilet paper and bath towels. I leave for a few days and come home to a...


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Letter

Posted by T on C , in Flashbacks, PTSD, Panic attack, Nightmares 06 June 2012 - - - - - - · 220 views

Writing a goodbye letter to someone who passed away years ago took me to a very dark place these past few days. What do you say to someone who ended their life, and what use is it to write something that hurts you to the core? My Therapist gave me that task and I have been hiding from reality since, like I was before my attempt months back...
Maybe it's...


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Letter

Posted by T on C , in Flashbacks, PTSD, Panic attack, Nightmares 06 June 2012 - - - - - - · 195 views

Writing a goodbye letter to someone who passed away years ago took me to a very dark place these past few days. What do you say to someone who ended their life, and what use is it to write something that hurts you to the core? My Therapist gave me that task and I have been hiding from reality since, like I was before my attempt months back...
Maybe it's...






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