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Lady Mozzer`s Rollercoaster Ride



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Cuts You Up

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 24 June 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I don`t know how to start this.
 
I haven`t been doing so well.I have no energy and no motivation.Simple everyday tasks seem to take enormous effort.I don`t know what to do.I end up hiding away in my bedroom
 
I had this heavy weight on my chest.It was my anxiety.I needed relief from my anxiety and all of the thoughts running through this messed...


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I Just Wanted To Feel Better

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 30 April 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I feel so tired and drained this morning after not sleeping again.I had a really bad night and ended up si ing.I`ve been really trying not to even though the urges I felt were so strong, I just wanted the thoughts to stop so I could get some rest.I just wanted to feel better.


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What It Feels Like For Me

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 27 April 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I suffer from insomnia.I think I`ve said that before.Sometimes though I don`t feel like going to bed.I want to stay up all night.I know I need to sleep but I don`t want to,need to.I suppose that goes hand in hand with this illness.Other times I don`t want to leave my bed.It feels like my best friend.Sleepytime is the only time I don`t have this crap rolli...


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Something Has Been Lost

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 07 April 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I`ve been trying to write this blog but my head felt foggy and cloudy.i couldn`t seem to get the words out.I guess my head is feeling clearer now.
 
A little while ago I was listening to some music and I just started crying.I feel so lost right now.I don`t know what`s going to become of me.I just feel so sad all the time.I want to be happy I want to...


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Lost And Lonely

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 24 March 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I feel this way all the time.I feel like I`ll never find my place in this world.I know I`ve said this before but I feel like I don`t belong....anywhere.I always feel out of place.I don`t even feel comfortable within myself.I sometimes wish I was like those other people I see.The people that have someone.The people that have tons of fun and lots of friends...


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The Noise Inside

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 10 March 2014 - - - - - - · 0 views

I`ve been really struggling lately.I have real difficulty getting out of bed.Everyday things take enormous effort.I`ve been so down I really miss my manic energy.I know that seems strange to say but at times I
don`t feel like moving.I just want to cry all the time.My anxiety is also worse.I start to panic when I have to leave the house or just be around a...


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Tired Of Fighting

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 27 January 2014 - - - - - - · 117 views

I`m tired of fighting this.It`s been going on for years.I keep fighting and trying.I try my best to keep busy, I take the meds.I am exhausted and so sad.This sadness goes down deep.I feel like I`m sinking further and further.My life is meaningless and I am worthless.Everything hurts so much.I don`t want to be in this body anymore.


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I Don`t Want To Go Back There

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 08 December 2013 - - - - - - · 140 views

I feel so exhausted sometimes physically and mentally.I feel my body,mind and spirit are tired.I get tired of trying.Why do things have to be so difficult?My body and head ache. I wish I could lie down and rest.I wish I could close my eyes and have things be quiet and peaceful.I can`t have that though,my brain wont allow.It won`t let me rest.I feel like I...


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With A Head Full Of Dread

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 23 November 2013 - - - - - - · 178 views

 
I haven`t been doing too well.My pdoc switched me from seroquel to abilify.So now I`m on cymbalta,abilify remeron and lorazepam.I`m not liking the abilify so far.My pdoc prescribed 30 mgs at bedtime.It`s hard to stay asleep on it.I keep waking up and can`t get comfortable in my bed.I keep fidgeting and need to keep changing positions.I know it`s...


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Nothingness

Posted by Lady Mozzer , 03 September 2013 - - - - - - · 162 views

Things are okay at the moment I guess.I mostly feel numb and blank.I suppose it`s better than the alternative.The alternative is pain,anxiety and overwhelming sadness.I guess it is okay sometimes.But those feelings always return.Sometimes I just want to scream so loud or punch a wall or something.I just want to let it all out.I want to release the black t...






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