I Hate You Don't Leave Me. [ Warning: Si Triggers ]

i don't know.
i'm really freaking out at the moment.
haha. wow. i'm such a little b*tch.

i'm so pathetic.
i am literally trash.
i wish i could disappear.

i keep trying to calm myself down but all i can do is blink back tears
and dig my nails in deeper into my skin
and breathe deep, ready to scream
at the top
of my lungs.

why is it that a song about drug addiction
fits all of my relationships perfectly?
(lover dearest > mariana's trench)
haha oh god i'm a mess.

i'm drawing blood now
little crescent moons digging into my skin

"sometimes i wish you would leave me
woah, i'm not sick of you yet
is that as good as it gets?

don't you leave me
woah i'm not sick of you yet
is that as good as it gets?

it hurts me to say that it hurts me to stay
and it might be alright if you go
it hurts me to say that i want you to stay
but it might be alright if you go
so leave me"

i am an unloveable piece of s**t and i hate myself
and i want to die