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#644224 Remember - It's Depression

Posted by budfox on 03 July 2010 - 09:55 PM

I was going to write this post as a journal entry to myself as I'm feeling very low and panicky at the moment. However on the off-chance that it might be of benefit to some of the good, nay great, folks on DF I thought I might as well post it here.

I read a lot of the posts on this forum and one very common feature of what people are going through is the fear and panic they feel at what is happening to them. Browse through the posts and you will see a lot of, 'I don't know what's happening', 'Something is not right', 'I'm losing my mind', etc. I've made similar statements in some of my previous posts on this very forum in the past.

Even though I've suffered from depression for more than 10 years I am still freaking out at how bad I'm feeling right now. Surely by now I should be an expert at managing this? I have had enough experience after all.

So, this is what I'm trying to tell myself (and for what it's worth I know this to be totally true, it's just that depression sometimes casts a dark fog over our thinking):

For all the terrible symptoms it produces we are all suffering from the SAME basic condition. Of course depression and anxiety affect us uniquely, such is the nature of a disease of the most amazing and complex system known to man, the human brain. However, even though we probably all feel like we are going through something totally personal to us, and I don't deny that in a sense we are, essentially we're all suffering from the same underlying illness, caused by abnormal changes in our brain neurochemistry.

The reason none of us can just 'snap out' of depression is that it's an absolutely real illness. Stop thinking of the symptoms you are experiencing as being a manifest reflection of something that is deeply wrong with you. You're just ill. In the future they will be able to precisely elucidate the neurochemical changes that are going on within the brain. For now, they have kind of a rough idea of what's going on but not much more than that.

Some days I wake up and can hardly get out of bed. I mean that quite literally. I feel numb to everything, no energy, utter hopelessness for the future and no interest in anybody or anything. Then a day later I can wake up and feel totally normal. Nothing in my life circumstances has changed from the bad day to the good day, it just so happens that for some reason that is inexplicable to me on the first day my neurochemistry is screwed up and on the second day it is within normal ranges.

So whatever weird, horrifying, disturbing symptoms you are suffering from please try to remember that you're just ill. If it was an illness of the body you would feel pain or you would have difficulty walking or impaired vision. However, because illnesses like diabetes, arthritis, etc affect organs other than the brain the symptoms they produce, while they can of course be very serious, are still more uniform and less confounding than an illness which affects the brain, an organ many many times more complex than anything else in these bodies of ours.

If you feel totally down or anxious when reading this then just accept that there is little that you can do about the way you feel right now to feel instantly better, although of course things like exercise and certain fast acting medications can help greatly. But also know that your brain chemistry is in flux and you are not going to carry on feeling like this forever. There's no point trying to analyse the way you feel or trying to think the way out of your depression, anymore than it would make sense to try and think your way out of diabetes. The depression or anxiety is there, it is making you feel so bad and when it goes you will feel better. I realise that we might all have developed depression for different reasons but I doubt there is one person on this forum that can say that his or her life circumstances are absolutely unique and that the life he or she has gone through is worse than that experienced by many of the millions of people who go through terrible things but don't ever develop depression.

Accept that the depression or anxiety is there for now, stop thinking about it and learn to function as best you can even with the worst depression or anxiety that you have ever felt. And take hope in the knowledge that this will get better.

Many posters are also blaming themselves for something that is not in the least their fault and saying things like 'I feel like a loser', 'I don't feel worthy', etc, etc. I say to you 'Nonsense!!!' You are just ill. In fact you are more worthy than most because you're dealing with a horrible illness and still managing to keep going. Most of you deserve medals, I tell you that. You're soldiers. Yet because our society is so nasty and backwards, we are still expected to function as well as people who don't have depression at all. When I think about how I am, I mean how functional I am on a good day as compared to a bad day, the gulf between the two is massive. The bad day Bud cannot possibly hope to compete with the good day Bud. It's like trying to be in a fight with someone with one hand tied behind your back. So be realistic and don't be too hard on yourselves. When you're down then do what you can but don't expect too much. Be gentle. As for what everyone in your company or your social circle thinks, to hell with them. They're not experiencing this and you are. Human beings like to go around feeling superior to others and judgmental, especially in modern workplaces. Their lack of sympathy, empathy or understanding is a sad reflection on them, not on you. I tell you you are all wonderful people and it pains me to see you suffer. Well maybe right at the moment you can't help the suffering but you can avoid compounding it.

Let's support each other through this and take the view that we are in it together. Know that if you post here you'll get a reply, so however incapable of understanding people in your lives might be, you'll always have this forum to come to. I don't know about you but I at least find great solace in that.

Thanks for listening.

B
  • chinainyourhands, MrSnappy, pensiveone and 104 others like this


#965148 An Inspiring Message From One Of Our Members

Posted by Forum Admin on 04 February 2013 - 01:09 PM

'budfox', on 03 Jul 2010 - 23:03, said:snapback.png


I was going to write this post as a journal entry to myself as I'm
feeling very low and panicky at the moment. However on the off-chance
that it might be of benefit to some of the good, nay great, folks on DF I
thought I might as well post it here.

I read a lot of the posts
on this forum and one very common feature of what people are going
through is the fear and panic they feel at what is happening to them.
Browse through the posts and you will see a lot of, 'I don't know what's
happening', 'Something is not right', 'I'm losing my mind', etc. I've
made similar statements in some of my previous posts on this very forum
in the past.

Even though I've suffered from depression for more
than 10 years I am still freaking out at how bad I'm feeling right now.
Surely by now I should be an expert at managing this? I have had enough
experience after all.

So, this is what I'm trying to tell myself
(and for what it's worth I know this to be totally true, it's just that
depression sometimes casts a dark fog over our thinking):

For all
the terrible symptoms it produces we are all suffering from the SAME
basic condition. Of course depression and anxiety affect us uniquely,
such is the nature of a disease of the most amazing and complex system
known to man, the human brain. However, even though we probably all feel
like we are going through something totally personal to us, and I don't
deny that in a sense we are, essentially we're all suffering from the
same underlying illness, caused by abnormal changes in our brain
neurochemistry.

The reason none of us can just 'snap out' of
depression is that it's an absolutely real illness. Stop thinking of the
symptoms you are experiencing as being a manifest reflection of
something that is deeply wrong with you. You're just ill. In the future
they will be able to precisely elucidate the neurochemical changes that
are going on within the brain. For now, they have kind of a rough idea
of what's going on but not much more than that.

Some days I wake
up and can hardly get out of bed. I mean that quite literally. I feel
numb to everything, no energy, utter hopelessness for the future and no
interest in anybody or anything. Then a day later I can wake up and feel
totally normal. Nothing in my life circumstances has changed from the
bad day to the good day, it just so happens that for some reason that is
inexplicable to me on the first day my neurochemistry is screwed up and
on the second day it is within normal ranges.

So whatever weird,
horrifying, disturbing symptoms you are suffering from please try to
remember that you're just ill. If it was an illness of the body you
would feel pain or you would have difficulty walking or impaired vision.
However, because illnesses like diabetes, arthritis, etc affect organs
other than the brain the symptoms they produce, while they can of course
be very serious, are still more uniform and less confounding than an
illness which affects the brain, an organ many many times more complex
than anything else in these bodies of ours.

If you feel totally
down or anxious when reading this then just accept that there is little
that you can do about the way you feel right now to feel instantly
better, although of course things like exercise and certain fast acting
medications can help greatly. But also know that your brain chemistry is
in flux and you are not going to carry on feeling like this forever.
There's no point trying to analyse the way you feel or trying to think
the way out of your depression, anymore than it would make sense to try
and think your way out of diabetes. The depression or anxiety is there,
it is making you feel so bad and when it goes you will feel better. I
realise that we might all have developed depression for different
reasons but I doubt there is one person on this forum that can say that
his or her life circumstances are absolutely unique and that the life he
or she has gone through is worse than that experienced by many of the
millions of people who go through terrible things but don't ever develop
depression.

Accept that the depression or anxiety is there for
now, stop thinking about it and learn to function as best you can even
with the worst depression or anxiety that you have ever felt. And take
hope in the knowledge that this will get better.

Many posters are
also blaming themselves for something that is not in the least their
fault and saying things like 'I feel like a loser', 'I don't feel
worthy', etc, etc. I say to you 'Nonsense!!!' You are just ill. In fact
you are more worthy than most because you're dealing with a horrible
illness and still managing to keep going. Most of you deserve medals, I
tell you that. You're soldiers. Yet because our society is so nasty and
backwards, we are still expected to function as well as people who don't
have depression at all. When I think about how I am, I mean how
functional I am on a good day as compared to a bad day, the gulf between
the two is massive. The bad day Bud cannot possibly hope to compete
with the good day Bud. It's like trying to be in a fight with someone
with one hand tied behind your back. So be realistic and don't be too
hard on yourselves. When you're down then do what you can but don't
expect too much. Be gentle. As for what everyone in your company or your
social circle thinks, to hell with them. They're not experiencing this
and you are. Human beings like to go around feeling superior to others
and judgmental, especially in modern workplaces. Their lack of sympathy,
empathy or understanding is a sad reflection on them, not on you. I
tell you you are all wonderful people and it pains me to see you suffer.
Well maybe right at the moment you can't help the suffering but you can
avoid compounding it.

Let's support each other through this and
take the view that we are in it together. Know that if you post here
you'll get a reply, so however incapable of understanding people in your
lives might be, you'll always have this forum to come to. I don't know
about you but I at least find great solace in that.

Thanks for listening.

B


  • Lady Mozzer, graycoyote, makemesmile and 89 others like this


#5203 Depression Forums Terms Of Service -

Posted by Forum Admin on 18 October 2004 - 08:56 PM

TERMS OF SERVICE - PLEASE READ

You agree, through your use of this service, not to impersonate any other person or entity, whether actual or fictitious. That means No "Dr." in your member name, or do you agree not to have more than one member account. Multiple accounts on Depression forums are not permitted. Any member found to have more than one account will be suspended. Suspended members found creating additional accounts will be banned.


Since English is the main language of this Website, we post in English. We do expect our members to do the same out of courtesy to everyone, as English is the only language acceptable on these Forums. Thank you.

You agree that you will not use these Forums to post any material which is knowingly false and/or defamatory, inaccurate, abusive, vulgar, hateful, harassing, obscene, profane, sexually oriented, threatening, invasive of another member's privacy.
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If you do decide to use your personal picture, you do so at your own risk, as it will be all over the internet in a nano second along with your posts and member name. You have been warned.

 

You may not state in your member name, (Dr.), profile, signature or post that you are a professional in the field of Mental Health or health care in general as we are peer to peer forums and do not give out professional advice. That is for your personal physician to do. Unless you can provide credentials to us and get our permission to do so, you many not put this information in your posts, moniker, (user name), nor in your signature.

 

Posting another members personal details, photos or web site details is forbidden and will result in being banned. Excessive, aggressive posts against other members, moderators and admin; or flaming will not be tolerated.

'Flaming', Inciting, or "Bashing" is best defined as posting or responding to a message in a way clearly intended to incite useless arguments, rants, and/or for launching personal attacks, insulting, being hateful, useless criticism, name calling, swearing and other bad behavior. We do not have the right to judge another member. We are all equal and share the commonality of depression and mental illness..

Please do not bring your issues with maligning Doctors, yours or anyone else's, any Medications or Pharmaceutical Companies or other message boards here. We are all here to learn to heal from and cope with Depression.

Dragging your personal issues through the mud is not helpful to members healing nor productive to our mission here as well as hijacking another member's topic or any comments meant to incite anger, which may be cause for your immediate suspension and possible banning.


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Administrators at their sole discretion, will ban or put a formal warning on members from having further access to this site when it is deemed that violations of our terms of service (TOS) have taken place.
Responding to a message in a way clearly intended to incite useless arguments and launching personal attacks to the Administration, will cause our decision to Ban you from these Forums for obvious reasons and for the safety of our members.
You alone are responsible for the content of your posts or responses to personal messages to Administrators , Moderators and Support Staff.




FURTHER CLARIFICATION

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Such violations will include any and all actions that have a clear intent to disrupt, interfere and incite other members. The ability for all members to come here expecting a safe and comfortable environment to seek help, support and information will always be paramount in our decision. We will do everything in our power to defend the integrity of this site against abuse and inappropriate posts.

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Helping DF



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We are PG rated forums that comply with Health on the Net's HONcode.



 

About Links on Depression Forums : Inappropriate Content explained
This will always be first and foremost as we are a self help peer to peer support community.

That being said, it means if your message, post or PM, isn't about offering support to members or asking for support, it is not appropriate for DF and prohibited from our community.

1) Advertising of any sort is prohibited.  Links to Amazon selling books, even if the topic has to do with mental health is not appropriate.

2) Advertisements of your website, a new resource, etc is also prohibited
3) Solicitation of another online community is restricted and will remove you from this community
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content pertaining to your depression or mental health and that would be with permission from Administration.

 

Editorial Independence

Depression Forums maintains absolute editorial independence about all content that appears on the Depression Forums website. That means that DF makes decisions about the information on our site free from outside or commercial influence.

That includes Political agendas.

 

 

And lastly, it should be clearly understood that the use of this private, free site, which is open to public registration, is done so as a privilege and not as guaranteed right. You are a guest here, free to come and go as you wish as long as some very simple rules, regulations and guidelines are adhered to.

*Freedom of Speech? Although the constitution of the US guarantees that Congress shall make no law abridging the freedom of speech, this website is not Congress. Freedom of speech rights do not extend to this privately owned website. The TOS/Guidelines of this website governs the behaviors and activities of the members. If you choose not to follow the guidelines agreed to during registration and with our Terms of Service/Guidelines, the result is a disabling of your account.

The thing many people with depression struggle with on other internet forums is that they end up getting dragged into awful debates and get flamed for their opinions or views.
We do not permit such discussions on DF as our site is intended to be a safe haven where members can discuss their issues without having to get
involved in the general arguing that occurs on other forums. Even though we believe in "Freedom of Speech", there is a very fine line drawn.
After all, it is illegal to yell "fire" in a movie theater. This is a pro-life website as well.

Triggers
These are words and phrases that can be triggering to our more fragile and sensitive members.

There is to be no discussion of methods of suicide or suicide attempts. There will also be no discussions describing graphic details of how you self harm. We shall advise you that we do not permit you to reference to specific types of alcohol or illegal drugs. No numbers of weight loss or gain, self injury, you get the idea. These will be deleted by our moderators.


It is our pleasure to host this site and make it available 24/7 to those members who use it respectfully and graciously. That is why we are here and these are the members we are here for.

This site cannot run smoothly without some necessary regulations.
We also reserve the right to take action against anything we feel is not appropriate.

As user you are agreeing to read these guidelines regularly and check for updates!
Although we would be saddened to hear that some members may choose to leave under these terms of service, we do understand that they have every right to make such a decision.
Your sole recourse for dissatisfaction with The Depression Forums, is to discontinue membership at DepressionForums.org

Administration reserves the right to amend the TOS from time to time by updating this page. Your continued use of this site will indicate your acceptance of the revised TOS.
Please periodically review this page for updates, to ensure that you are familiar with the most current version of our TOS .

Please also refer to our DF Member's Guidelines/Posting Etiquette
as this is an extension of our Terms Of Service (TOS)

We appreciate you being here. Your contributions, whether seeking help or graciously offering support, have a far-reaching impact. Please be responsible.

 

Please refer to Member's Guidlines/Posting Etiquette - (Part II of our Terms of Service - TOS)

 

Updated February 14, 2014


  • 20YearsandCounting, LaurynJcat, KidSurvivor2011 and 89 others like this


#923370 Generic Antidepressant Not Equivalent To Original Wellbutrin: Fda

Posted by Forum Admin on 07 October 2012 - 01:16 PM

Generic antidepressant not equivalent to original Wellbutrin: FDA

Sat, Oct 6 2012
(Reuters) - The U.S. Food and Drug Administration said new data indicate that the generic version of the popular antidepressant Wellbutrin is not equivalent to the original drug manufactured by GlaxoSmithKline.
Budeprion XL 300 mg, or bupropion hydrochloride extended-release tablets, are manufactured by Impax Laboratories Inc and marketed by Teva Pharmaceuticals USA Inc.
The FDA, in a notice posted on its website on Wednesday, said it has changed the therapeutic equivalence rating for the product in the agency's Approved Drug Products with Therapeutic Equivalence Evaluations to show that Budeprion XL 300 mg fails to demonstrate therapeutic equivalence to Wellbutrin XL 300 mg.
Impax has requested that the FDA withdraw approval of budeprion XL 300 mg extended-release tablets, the FDA said. Impax and Teva have stopped shipping the product, the agency said. (Reporting by Debra Sherman; Editing by Will Dunham)


http://www.reuters.com
  • HerbertGahg, SporpRorCop, Conaapoth and 25 others like this


#632777 Introducing Yourself

Posted by Forum Admin on 23 May 2010 - 12:43 PM

If you're new to our DF community, taking the step for the first time to post publicly to a message board can sometimes seem daunting, intimidating. Don't be afraid to jump into a discussion once you have registered with us.
We have a very supportive community that serves up heavy doses of support, encouragement and enthusiasm. We love meeting new people and being friendly. While we hope that you'll become an active participant and join in our discussions, you're welcome, of course, to simply hang out silently until you feel more comfortable posting a message.
We are your safe haven and will never judge you. There is no stigma here. You are not alone.

This Welcome Forum is for a short Introduction to our members/community. Just click on "New Topic" at the top of the forum to intro yourself. It is not intended to tell your story or to journal/Blog. That is saved for the other forums or for your Blog here at the DF which you may create.

***As a new member, you will have the ability to create two active topics in each Forum. You may reply to as many as you wish.
Click on "New Topic" or you may "Reply" to an ongoing post. You will get the hang of it if you have never posted in a forum before.


*An active topic is defined as a topic that is on the front page of our busier forums or a topic that has received replies in the last 48 hours in our quieter Forums.
If you are in major crisis you may post your topic in Members Needing Extra Support Now (DEPRESSION - Members Needing Extra Support Now - Members Needing Extra Support Now!).

If you are uncertain how to get around the forums, please click on the HELP button on the upper right of the page. :shocked:

Posting - How to Reply To A Post or Start a New Topic in a Forum
"Reply to a Post" or Start a "New Topic"
You have three choices to make as to which buttons to click on:

"Fast Reply" "Reply to this topic" "Start new topic"

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#644254 Remember - It's Depression

Posted by budfox on 04 July 2010 - 12:14 AM

Henri,

I'm really glad that this post helped, even if only a tiny bit.

It's taken me years to realise the truth of my post. I remember when I had my first (and worst) episode of depression. It was during exams and I was in a terrible, terrible way. What made it even worse was looking at the smiling faces around me and just thinking I was the biggest loser freak to be feeling so utterly despondent and hopeless. How could they cope with the same stress so easily, while I was so destroyed?

Since that time I have found out that many people I have looked up to as being able to cope with anything have actually gone through periods of serious depression themselves. I admire them all the more for it.

For someone who is really depressed or anxious just getting through the day is a massive achievement. Anything we do on top of it should make us really proud of ourselves. That is not to say that I think we should set the bar low. I think people with depression and anxiety are capable of doing remarkable things - all you need to do is to look at the list of famous depression and anxiety sufferers to see that. However there will be periods, sometimes long periods when we're not capable of all that much.

I do think that acceptance of depression, which means recognising that we are sick and therefore less able to operate (be it in a social, work or relationship context), is part of the cure.

I have enormous respect for everyone that posts on this forum because I can see how tough it is to live the lives we are living. Hopefully those lives will return to normal quickly but I know that for some people, myself included, depression is chronic and so we have to learn to live with it, while still taking appropriate steps to vanquish it.

The irony is that a lot of the people out there who truly are worthless probably never even feel worthless for one minute!! There really are some bad human beings out there, wanton in their greed and selfishness. But, not getting a college degree because the depression made it impossible does not make you worthless. Having to go off sick from or quit a job because the anxiety was too much to cope with in a stressful work environment does not make you worthless. Finding it difficult to sustain a loving relationship because every interaction with your partner is coloured by your depression does not make you worthless. Being unable to form or maintain friendships or have confidence with people you're attracted to does not make you worthless.

None of these things make you worthless. In my view the only thing that makes someone worthless is intentionally inflicting emotional or physical pain on another human being, or in my opinion animal, and never stopping to think twice about it until the day you die.

You know that old saying, 'If you think you might be crazy you're probably not?'. Well I think it would be equally true to say 'If you think you might be worthless you're most likely not'. The fact that you are questioning you're own worth means that you're trying and sometimes failing and having to go through hell. That in itself shows enormous worth and spirt. Take pride in it.
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#387179 New Members Please Read

Posted by Forum Admin on 29 March 2008 - 11:23 AM

If you're new to our community, taking the step for the first time to post publicly to a message board can sometimes seem intimidating. Don't be afraid to jump into a discussion once you have registered with us.
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#913159 Answers To Curing Anhedonia/numbness/zombieness/no Emotions/apathy/no Libido....

Posted by itstrevor on 05 September 2012 - 01:50 AM

I would like to start this thread for everyone to share their experiences with anhedonia (emotional numbness, inability to experience pleasure, apathy, dead sex drive, etc.) so that we may all collectively find the best solutions. The more experiences we have here, the easier it will be to make connections and narrow down useful strategies/medications/solutions, We all need to work together on this.

I would like to add my personal experience with anhedonia and what I have discovered about it along the way. I have been anhedonic now for 10 months due to major depression triggered by chronic stress. Anhedonia is my only persistent symptom and is occurring in the absence of any other depressive symptom (I do not feel "depressed," I do not "feel" at all). For this reason, many people experiencing anhedonia (me included) find fault with the technical association with "anhedonia" being only a symptom of another disease rather than a syndrome in itself. Firstly, what I have noticed about every person experiencing anhedonia (me included) is that they seem to mention the inability to experience the same list of things: music/art, sex/romance/dating, and emotional appreciation. To me, all of these are inter-related and so anhedonia really boils down to a flatness of emotional responsivity to anything and a general inability to experience pleasure. The best way to describe it is to make the analogy to the loss of interest in sex as similar to the loss of interest in sex a male might experience soon after ejaculating (refractory period)or the loss of interest in music to the loss of interest one might feel towards a song after having heard the same song repeatedly for several months. I have read many articles on anhedonia and have seen many theories that suggest that anhedonia is a result of the failure to anticipate pleasure rather than experiencing it and that it involves the neurotransmitters dopamine and norepinepherine. Firstly I would like to say that I can anticipate having a pleasurable response to something, but the only thing that is missing for me is the response itself. For example, I may get an adrenaline rush from something such as sex, but it is not accompanied by feelings of pleasure. I anticipate the pleasure, but I only experience the adrenaline, not the pleasure itself. I have had partial responses to stimulants and dopaminergic agents but no response to norepinepherine modulating drugs, though I have read many reports of people having success with norepinepherine drugs. Others left no noticeable effect.

Strangely, I would sometimes spontaneously and instantaneously get a “window” of normalcy where my emotional numbness would break for a few minutes and I would feel normal, as if a “light switch” was controlling my emotions and ability to feel pleasure. My libido, my numbed emotions, and that zombie-like feeling I was having – they were all related, they all came from that same part of me that was “turned off.” It’s the same type of sensation that I was missing – whether it was the feeling that I was not getting thinking about a girl, the excitement I was not experiencing thinking about my future, and the enjoyment I was not experiencing being around my family doing activities with them, they all (pleasure) were just “off.” As time passed, I would see fewer and fewer of these windows until they disappeared completely. At first, with much difficulty I felt two windows once while crying shortly after arriving at home and once during a car ride with my mother.

There seems to be two "camps" that psychiatrists fall under. In one camp are the psychiatrists who tend to disregard anhedonia as "just a symptom of the underlying depression/other illness" and not mainly a dopaminergic phenomenon saying "treat the underlying depression/other illness, and the symptoms go away with it like a cascade." These psychiatrists believe that SSRIs are most effective for any type of depression, regardless of symptoms, (usually calling me "obsessive" for researching or disregard science backing it up as "just theories,” and that “nobody knows what’s actually going on in the brain" etc.) and often deny that serotonergics make anhedonia worse (I've been with two of this type). The other "camp" is, in my opinion at least, more reasonable; psychiatrists falling under the second camp listen to symptoms and recognize anhedonia as mainly dopaminergic or to do with norepinepherine.

It's known that the activation of certain serotonin receptors inhibit the release of dopamine, (obviously shown in the blunting effect and loss of libido associated with SSRIs/SNRIs) and it is also known that dopamine plays a crucial role in the processing of emotional responses. Norepinepherine is another key part of the puzzle, in my experience sort of the "second banana" to dopamine, as it is shown in many studies that animals lose preference towards a reward with reductions in norepinepherine - norepinepherine is associated with motivation and arousal.

The treatments that I have found through research to be successful in treating anhedonia are:
Stimulants - Methylphenidate, Dextroamphetamine, etc.
Dopamine Agonists - Pramipexole, Ropinirole, Cabergoline, Apomorphine, Bromocriptine, Rotigotine, etc.
Low Dose Antipsychotics - Aripiprazole, Amisulpride, Sulpride, etc.
Serotonin Receptor Antagonists - Buspirone, Low dose Fluoexitine, etc.
SSREs - Tianeptine
Dopamine Reuptake Inhibitors - Amineptine, Bupropion, etc.
Norepinepherine Reuptake Inhibitors - Desipramine, Atomoxetine, Nortryptaline, Bupropion, etc.
MAOIs - Parnate, Nardil, Selegiline, etc.
Other - Amantadine, Nicotine, Testosterone, Levodopa, Phenylethylamine, Cyproheptadine, Thyroid Augmenting (lithium for example), L-Tyrosine, L-Theanine, SAM-E, St. John's Wort, etc.

Unfortunately several drugs are not available in the USA such as Tianeptine, Adrafinil, and Amisulpride, and many of these medications have significant drawbacks such as tolerance, addiction, long-lasting side effects, severe reactions, heart problems, heptatoxicity, blood pressure problems, and more.

I have tried Wellbutrin, Abilify, L-Tyrosine, L-Theanine, SAM-E, DLPA, Ritalin, Adderall, and Desipramine. My experience was that I felt no different on Wellbutrin even after being on it for 8 weeks at the highest recommended dose (450mg). Abilify (5-7.5mg) helped me to regain focus and the ability to do something for longer periods of time without feeling anxious, though had little noticeable effect on anhedonia and gave me random twitching and tremors. L-Tyrosine (500-1500mg) had no noticeable effect. L-Theanine (300-1000mg) made me extremely agitated and irritable. SAM-E made me more irritable. DLPA (1000-2000mg) had no noticeable effect. Ritalin (15-30mg 2x daily) was the closest thing to helping my anhedonia, but was unreliable, worked for only about an hour, quickly formed a tolerance, and raised my heart rate substantially. Adderall (5-15mg 2x daily) only raised my heart rate with no noticeable effect on the anhedonia, but I can't help but to feel that this was because of a cross-tolerance with the Ritalin (I had already become tolerant to the Ritalin after only a week, so thus I was also tolerant to other stimulants such as Adderall). Desipramine (200mg) left no noticeable effect besides dry mouth and tremors after several weeks, but I later found out that due to its heptatoxicity, my liver was reacting poorly to it and thus I have been forced to come off of it.

For anhedonia I would like to take next a combination of Pramipexole, Cyproheptadine, Busiprone, and Selegiline, though I am not a doctor so do not regard this as educated medical advice without consulting your doctor (just a legal disclaimer). I will be visiting my doctor tomorrow and will start a new medication regimen and let everyone know how it goes. Please post what your experiences have been, what works, what doesn't, if you've found relief or not, or just the details of your anhedonia.
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#898282 This Is What Cured My Depression Permanently

Posted by Finally_happy on 18 July 2012 - 07:29 AM

This is what cured my depression permanently and I just want to share it. I do not advise anyone to stop taking counseling or medication without the direction and supervision of a medical professional.

I apologize if I sound blunt or mean, but in order to beat depression permanently with no drugs, counseling or anything harmful to your health or life, there is only one thing I know that really works and it will take some real honesty with yourself. I know this from my own experience. I was diagnosed with clinical depression and tried everything from hotline's, counseling, therapy, medications (pharmaceutical and holistic) as well as illegal drugs, and I was still depressed until I discovered these things about myself and made the following choices.


1. REALIZATION
2. ASSUMING RESPONSIBILITY
3. RELEASING
4. FORGIVING
5. ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
6. TAKING CONTROL

(REALIZATION) - I REALIZED THAT I AM THE CAUSE OF MY OWN THOUGHTS THAT WERE CAUSING MY DEPRESSION - I could no longer BLAME OTHERS, my past experiences, chemical imbalance or anything else for that matter! There are many things that we have no control of that we can either CHOOSE to be sad about, or we can also CHOOSE to allow those things to make us stronger.

(ASSUMING RESPONSIBILITY) - I ASSUMED RESPONSIBILITY FOR BEING THE ONE TORTURING MYSELF - For whatever the reason I had believed that I deserved to suffer and I made sure that I would suffer at all times with any and all thoughts that were painful. With this knowledge, I learned to let go of self defeating beliefs.

(RELEASING) - I STOPPED DWELLING ON MYSELF - I was so wrapped up with my own thoughts and feelings that I never took into consideration that anyone else or anything else mattered.

(FORGIVING) - WITH THIS NEW UNDERSTANDING, I MADE THE MOST IMPORTANT DECISION OF MY LIFE - I CHOSE that I forgive myself, and everyone who ever wronged me.

( ACKNOWLEDGEMENT) I BEGAN TO LEARN APPRECIATION - I CHOSE to acknowledge the good in myself, in the world and in others.

(TAKING CONTROL) - I CREATED A REALISTIC GOAL LIST - I made small goals that were easily obtainable and accomplished just one each day. With each goal that I completed, I developed a sense of accomplishment and that feeling empowered me and gave me the strength and the courage I needed to move forward in my life and to let go of the things I held on to in the past.

THERE IS NO HOPE FOR A BETTER PAST, BUT THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE FOR A BETTER NOW AND A BETTER FUTURE, IF WE CHOOSE TO MAKE IT SO.

It is truly our choices that make or break us.

IT HAS BEEN NINE YEARS NOW AND I AM STILL FREE FROM THE CHAINS OF DEPRESSION :happy: GOOD LUCK AND MY BEST WISHES TO YOU ALL !!! :hearts:
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#1092299 Everyone Who Posts Here Is My Hero

Posted by Epictetus on 01 August 2014 - 02:46 PM

Everyone who posts here, even if the post if sad, is my hero because even one short post can touch the heart of someone else in a once in a lifetime way across space and time.  It could be someone reading your post right now or someone who will find it in a year and feel less alone with their depression.  I also salute everyone who merely reads these posts because that too is a sign of incredible strength, wisdom, courage and goodness!  Bravo!


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#999688 Stuck In A Depressed Rut For Years, Can't Feel Positive

Posted by Epictetus on 07 July 2013 - 12:27 PM

I'm so sorry to read of your persistent depression JGF.  Like you, the roots of depression in my life also go all the back to childhood.  You say you have tried psychology and medication to no avail.  Have you tried philosophy?

 

Are there any beliefs you have which "might"  prevent you from experiencing the joy of life?

 

Here are a few strongly held beliefs that can interfere with a person's happiness:

 

---  Believing that because we desire perfection [or near perfection] in ourselves and others that perfection is possible in this finite world.  We can sometimes desire things that are not really possible [wishful thinking].  I do that a lot in my own life and it causes a lot of unnecessary misery.

 

--- Sometimes the wishful thinking can revolve around "ideals" or "idealistic phantasies":

 

The desire to be the perfect or nearly child to parents and relatives

The desire to have perfect or nearly perfect parents or relative [or friends]

The desire to have ideal qualities:  being the ideal student, worker, success, popular and desirable person, ideal normal person

 

Sometimes "wishful thinking" is spontaneous and unconscious or barely conscious and the result of genetics and/or upbringing. 

 

--- The belief that happiness can only come from external sources, that alone and by oneself one does not have the inner resources to supply happiness.

 

--- The belief that people other than yourself are in an ideal situation, that those, for example in relationships are "happier" than those who are alone. [I get many many phone calls from people in relationships who complain of loneliness in the relationship, a lack of understanding, feeling trapped, being forced into unpleasant compromises, being controlled, emotional blackmail, arguments, fights, the silent treatment, boredom and so on. ] Sometimes we can think a relationship is an escape from the human condition.  I am not  criticizing relationships, only "wishful thinking" about relationships.

 

---  The belief that people or yourself can be faithfully and realistically and truthfully expressed in words or phrases which "sum them up":  like good, bad, ugly, fat, unpopular, unsuccessful, losers, un-cool, rotten, lazy and so on.  Do you find yourself or others engaging in this because these are over-simplifications of complex reality.  No human being [including yourself] can be "summed up" in a word or phrase without gross oversimplification to the point of untruth and misrepresentation. 

 

--- The belief that one is worthless "unless" one meet a certain expectation, goal or performance objective.  The belief that there is no intrinsic value to things but that value only comes at the end of a process.  This belief would mean that a rose, a sparrow, a swan and so on are useless because they don't "accomplish" anything really important.  This belief can involve the belief that one is "nothing" unless one is successful, has friends, lovers, accomplishments and so on.

 

--- The belief that things and people [and ourselves] are either all-good or all-bad [false dichotomy/false dilemma].

 

--- The belief that people or oneself "should" be able to act with perfection.  The unwillingness to accept that the human brain is finite and is not an all-seeing, all-knowing, all-powerful being.  The belief that mistakes are always catastrophic.

 

--- The belief that one always acts from complete freedom and that freedom is not subject to influence by fears, strong emotions, subconscious drives, unrealistic thought patterns, upbringing, spontaneous instincts and impulses and so on.  The belief that one is 100% responsible for things and that there are no grey areas, no degrees of voluntariness and responsibility.

 

--- The belief that "mistakes" are all equal, that all "moral" failures are equal.  Adolf Hitler brought about the destruction of at least 10,000,000 people indirectly at least.  Does one equate one's moral mistakes with this?  Isn't there a hierarchy of good and evil?

 

--- The belief that harsh treatment of one's brain [by pressuring it to achieve perfection, forcing life-or-death senses of urgency on it in non life-or-death situations] or beating it up mentally for errors is "good for it."

 

--- The belief that love of abstract ideals [wishful thinking] is better than love of one's own brain or the brains of other people. 

 

Sometimes bringing philosophical reflection to depression can help when psychology or medication seem not to work by themselves.  Sometimes, not always. 

 

I am not you.  So it is possible, in fact likely that my words will not apply to your situation.  In that case, please accept my apology and allow me to substitute my best wishes in place of my unhelpful words.  Every depression is different and what works for one person might not work for someone else.

 

  I can only speak to what has worked for me.  Others here will offer what worked for them.  You are the only expert on you.  Anything I say in a short post after reading one of your posts cannot but be a gross oversimplification of your life and life itself.  I do feel bad about your depression and your situation.  I do greatly hope that you can recover the joy of life again.  I hope the people here on the Forum do you a greater service than I have today and that through a combination of things you will find something helpful to your mood and situation.  I wish you all good things.  Have a nice day and night JGF.  !!!


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#860781 I Did It

Posted by Acrowley on 29 March 2012 - 02:17 PM

Hi everyone. This is just a post to tell you people that I told my school counsellor about my depression. I'm talking to my parents with her tomorrow. So, yeah, that's about it. Just felt like telling someone.
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#1003731 Don't Tell Me To "pull Yourself Together" Or "be Strong"...

Posted by makemesmile on 26 July 2013 - 07:44 PM

Just a few phrases that I constantly hear and really get on my nerves for obvious reasons!

 

Also,  I hate how people associate mental illness as a weakness, when actually I am one of the strongest people I know as I have to live with and fight these feelings everyday, when my brain is telling me I'm better off not being alive! 


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#999692 Stuck In A Depressed Rut For Years, Can't Feel Positive

Posted by Epictetus on 07 July 2013 - 01:35 PM

I just wanted to add one more thing JGF.

 

Sometimes just "loving" one's brain is wonderfully effective in reducing depression [ in my experience ].  A lot of time people who are especially empathetic and compassionate to others can be rather brutal to their own brains.  It can help to try to picture one's brain or conceptualize it.  The brain  is amazing but small, weighing around 3 pounds when fully developed.  It prioritizes many of one's needs automatically, such as circulation, respiration, metabolism.  It works 24/7 to keep a person alive. 

 

If you can find somewhere in your heart some empathy for your own brain, it can really help a lot sometimes [as I said in my experience].  One can talk to the brain.  One can comfort it.  One can console it.  Sometimes this seem odd at first [although we don't think it odd to beat up our brain with negative labels!].  You can tell your brain that you love it.  If you're not "feeling it", if you're not "feeling the love," you can just start by saying the words.  Usually the feelings will come.  In depression the brain is really suffering.  One can withhold love from it and be very stoical.  But sometimes just showering it with love can help.  It is being victimized and hurt.  It can help to be able to finally reach a point of compassion for the suffering brain inside of you.  It can help to put your brain's best interest first especially when it is ill.  It always puts you first, or at least the brain stem does.

 

Best!!


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#938824 What Are You Proud Of Today?

Posted by Rainahblue on 16 November 2012 - 12:55 AM

I'm trying (really hard) to be more positive Putting myself down comes so easily that it's often hard to give myself credit for anything. Hence, this thread. Normally, I only point out what I didn't accomplish, didn't finish, didn't remember... but I'm determined to cut down on that habit. It's really hard to stop though...

Today I'm proud of the fact that I did a few chores and finished a craft with my daughter. :smilingteeth: Yay me!

What's something you're proud of for today?
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#918447 My Wish Is That Everyone Here Will Read This

Posted by SquareOne on 21 September 2012 - 12:04 AM

I haven't posted here in almost a year. I started taking Zoloft one year ago and my life is completely different. Every single apsect of my life is better. I wanted to share this with you here because for years and years I came to this forum and was often overwhelmed by so many stories about people suffering from this horrible, horrible disease. I never wanted to belive drugs could work for anyone, so even when I did try one for a few weeks, the side-effects would be too much and I'd give up.

Last year I went through one of those "once in a lifetime breakups" that nearly ended my life. It was through this I discovered my depression was as severe as it can get without needing hospitilization, and this is when I decided I needed to stop taking trazadone (which did hardly anything for me) and get on a stronger, more effective antidepressant. If only I knew then what I know now...

1) Don't believe ANY placebo antidepressant studies that claim they are ineffective. Most people in those studies are not clinically depressed and therefore it will have no effect. In my opinion, unless you have actually planned or visualized commiting suicide, you are probably not depressed enough to need medication. Life can be brutal, but just because you are feeling depressed doesn't mean you have a chemical imbalance, which is the only circumstances for a person needing an anti-depressant. They are massivly over-prescribed to patients that have sufficiently functioning brain activity.

2) The internet is the world's greatest resource for complaining and negativity. There are many people doing very well that come here to help, but the vast majority are not doing so well. This gives the impression to onlookers that everyone with depression feels this way and there is no hope for any of us.

3) These medications are only to get the chemicals flowing, it's up to you find what makes your brain stay healthy and get the most out of the meds you are taking. For me it's 60% meds and 40% staying hydrated, taking B-complex, Omega 3, staying active and having goals. None of what I have achieved would be possible without Zoloft, but 60% won't get anyone very far, you have to work for the rest.

4) Find a med that works well enough and get on with it. There is no perfect drug and you will always get depressed from time to time. It's vital to remember how bad things were in the past, and how much better they are on the right meds. Always tell yourself how much worse things could be and count your blessings daily.

5) Fight through the side-effects. If I wasn't so desperate for help during my break-up I never would have stayed on it, plain and simple. They were aweful and came at the worst possible time in my life but I stuck it out because I didn't want to feel like I was feeling EVER again.


I posted this because I told myself if I ever did get better, I would want others to read about how I got to where I am, rather than just stop posting here and go about living a normal healthy life. This is only written from my perspective and I have no intentions of stepping on any toes or offending anyone, I just wanted what I have experienced and learned this past year to be known to my fellow sufferers of depression.

Be well,

Ryan
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#872964 I Am A Fighter And I Won!

Posted by Achelois on 04 May 2012 - 05:13 PM

I am off meds! Docs told me I would have to be on for life.
I feel great.
I got a senior job in IT with a crazy (in a good way ;-) salary.
I also fly next month to see my fave tennis player live, having booked VIP seat.


I wanted to give up. To die. It lasted for 2,5 years!

IT'S OVER.

YOU can do it too!!
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#491647 Pro Meds? Or Anti Meds?

Posted by frangipani on 17 February 2009 - 07:52 PM

Everyone's entitled to their own opinions but I've been a little disturbed lately about the stigma inside our own community regarding taking meds.

"Easy way out", "being dependent", etc. are some of the ways taking meds are viewed by some. I was asked the other day whether I think I'll be on meds for life. I said "probably" and that I prefer it to the alternative, which is living in a mental/emotional hell.

Mental illness can be life threatening. Why is it that people treat cancer with chemo/radiation, diabetes with insulin, broken bones with casts, but are afraid to restore their sanity with medication? Yes, the science of psychiatry is murky and meds can be overprescribed but so can other forms of healthcare (some surgeries come to mind). If something is broken, is it weak to want to fix it, especially when one symptom of the brokenness is that doing things that involve effort feels impossible? Why is struggling deemed the better way to go than getting help?

And what about the "I felt better so I stopped cold turkey?" Do people believe that mental illness is like an infection that clears up after a course of antibiotics? If the only thing that was making you feel better were the meds (i.e., no added therapy or lifestyle changes), what's the likelihood that the depression won't return as soon as the meds are out of your system? What do you think changed?

These are just questions, not accusations. I've just been a little bothered and wanted to know what you all think.

I apologize if any of this offends anyone.
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#1066270 What Are You Thankful For Today? Even If It's Something Little...

Posted by Writer2451 on 29 April 2014 - 04:09 PM

This is a big one, but I'm very thankful that I have been named the official president of the Buddhist club I started going to over the past 8 or 9 months. Joining in the first place was a huge leap for me, but they have been the kindest people I've ever known and now they put me in charge. It's helping me feel more important and cared about :hugs: So much has changed in the last year of my life. I'm thankful for all of it. Things can change for the better so quickly without us even expecting it. 


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#1095460 Rip Robin Williams

Posted by kate33624 on 11 August 2014 - 07:07 PM

So sad to hear he passed today. Goes to show you that no one is immune to depression and suicide. Such a loss. Will always be one of my favorite actors. Hope he's in a better place now. :-(
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