This is my first post on any forum so please bear with me.

My boyfriend has been on fluoxetine for 3 months now and the major side effects that are getting him down are waking up every couple of hours in the night therefore waking up shattered all the time, and the inability to orgasm. He is talking about coming off it as he is struggling with the inability to orgasm. He hasn't lost his sex drive at all he is still as horny as ever and he has no problem getting aroused :-) he is just frustrated as no matter what we have tried he can not orgasm with me. We are very open and we can talk about everything and he has told me that he has managed to come by himself but it takes him forever and a day. The fluoxetine seems to be helping him with the depression but I am worried that if this problem doesn't fade or go away he is going to come off them. Has anyone got any advice regarding this or any similar experiences. He is hoping it subsides after a while and I am too. He is worried I am going to leave him if we can't have the good sex life we used to have, he already wonders how I put up with him as he can be really hard to be with at times because of his mood swings. I have assured him I am going nowhere but when you are depressed I don't think you see things like that.

Hi Flomelly! to the DF! This is a very common problem with fluoxetine. I take 40mg a day and I have trouble reaching orgasm as well, and just like your boyfriend - I still have a sex drive I just can't acheive the big O as easily as I used to be able to. I think it does get better with time though. The last time I was on prozac, my doctor actually prescribed viagra for me. I didn't even know a female could take viagra-, but apparantly they can! So perhaps talk to your general physician or psych doc about perscribing it - it wouldn't hurt for you guys to try it.

Shanban

This post has been edited by shannabanana777: Jan 24 2009, 06:24 PM

I'm sorry you guys are dealing with this. I've been doing reading on meds because I was rx'd wellbutrin. I stopped taking itafter a week, because the side effects are too scary for *me*. HOWEVER, in the reading I've done, some people have had it prescribed in addition to their ssri and it may help with the sexual side effects. I don't know if it's the case for everyone, but maybe worth him mentioning to his doc. Nothing is ever certain, but we all deserve a fulfilling sex life.

Aww thats a shame, but it seems common on prozac. Least he get please to see you so to speak so you know he still cares.

He needs to speak to his Dr, maybe try something else. It's good the flux helps with his depression.

I wish you both well soon xxx

[
I'm sorry you guys are dealing with this. I've been doing reading on meds because I was rx'd wellbutrin. I stopped taking itafter a week, because the side effects are too scary for *me*. HOWEVER, in the reading I've done, some people have had it prescribed in addition to their ssri and it may help with the sexual side effects. I don't know if it's the case for everyone, but maybe worth him mentioning to his doc. Nothing is ever certain, but we all deserve a fulfilling sex life.
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Thanks for all your advice. I haven't heard about wellbutrin being used for this but I will definitely look into that. He has already tried one other AD before this but that had the opposite effect and make him sleep all the time. He is not having a good day today he hasn't got off the couch all day and he is really feeling low. Think the constant disturbed sleep isn't helping though as he is constantly shattered he can only sleep for maybe an hour then he is awake for an hour then he falls back asleep for another hour it is making him so tired the next day. He is still trying to work full time as he can't afford to not work so working a full time job while being shattered is getting him down too. Even if we could have sex don't think he'd be able to stay awake long enough at the minute

for what it's worth (second hand info), i've heard/read that prozac is one of the worst as far as sexual side effects go. your boyfriend definitely needs a doctor who he is comfortable discussing this with -- AND one who is sensitive to the problem to try to resolve it.

i once had a doc who told me, when i said the lack of sex drive AND response; i.e., NOTHING posssible, desire or orgasm when i was on effexor was upsetting to me, "well, i guess you have to make a choice then, do you want to be depressed or give up sex?" -- to me that is NOT an appropriate response. i later went to another doc who took a much more optimistic approach and prescribed wellbutrin for me to use "as needed" (in conjunction w/ the daily effexor) - as in, "when i go on a date" (that was the way the doc said it, which i thought was cute, considering she knew i was in a monogamous relationship) - then she prescribed 30 pills and told me to come back in a month - i said "oh, my gosh, i won't need that many!" and she goes "well, never say never!" to me that was so much more reassuring than the other doc who basically was saying "quit whining and get out of my office." sex IS important.

so, make sure your boyfriend has a doc who is knowledgeable and who will be sensitive to his needs. they can decide together another med to try, or add the wellbutrin to the prozac, or whatever they decide. it's important that your boyfriend be comfortable enough to really discuss this w/ the doc. i cant' emphasize that enough!

good luck ~~ mimsy

Thanks mimsy I will tell him and see what he says. I haven't really heard much about wellbrutin but I will definitely have to do some research. I know it is really important to him to be able to be intimate with me and I know it is really getting him down that we can't have full intercourse as he just gets frustrated when he can't orgasm. Do you just take the wellbrutin when you are planning to get intimate? I think he will try anything at the minute so I will look into it. Thanks for all your replies. As you have all said it is bad enough being depressed and sex is very important in a relationship and I don't want him to come off the medication just because he can't cope with this side effect.

He would have to plan a bit ahead, since if it does give the effect, it won't be instant. However, another thing he would want to talk to the doc about would be to get the non-controlled release wellbutrin (i.e, the first version, where it is released more at first and then tapers off quicker - probably a low dose). so i don't think the "XR" (or is is "XL" for wellbutrin???) version would work for that purpose b/c it is sustained release.

also you know, his doc might have a completely different approach/med to try. i've also heard that dosage is really important for a lot of people; they respond much differently to one dose than another of the same medication. i'm not sure about prozac, but maybe there's a way for him to take a lower dose, or even none, on the "date days" and see if that makes a difference. that would seem the least dramatic effect (but don't try that w/o talking about it w/ the doctor!!)

it will be a process to figure out though (unless you guys are graced w/ a lot of good luck and find the answer quickly), so be prepared for frustration, etc.

good luck,
mimsy

I think discussing the use of viagra might be a better option than wellbutrin because of his sleep problems. Wellbutrin is pretty notorious for causing and worsening insomnia. But another good AD addition that might help his sexual function but will almost certainly solve his sleep problem would be Remeron.
Like Wellbutrin, Remeron is more likely to improve sexual function than ruin it, but it's also often prescribed as a sleep aid. It really improves one's sleep cycle. The downside is that for the first couple weeks he's gonna be super sleepy-- but that's already a problem so might be worth a shot.

I'm no doctor, mind you, but I've run the gauntlet on meds and have researched every single one of them inside out, and I think it's worth discussing with the doc :)

This is a big problem with SSRI's for most men. Im going through same thing,a big kick in the Ego. Maybe the
Dr. will try another SSRI,Good Luck.

thanks for all your advice. he did try mirtazapine for a month to try and combat his sleep problem but he was comatosed for the whole month and the AD side just made him feel even worse. He has also just started taking herbal tablets Kalms night time which are a herbal sleep remedy. He has only tried it a few nights but they seem to be helping him a little and I think he will try anything. He is a bit of a stubborn man who has never really been ill before and this depression has really come as a shock to him so he is really embarassed talking to his doctor and to be honest his doctor isn't really that interested. He never told him half of the side effects he has had just prescribed him the tablets and told him to come back every month. He still has a sex drive and he does still have no trouble having an erection and we can still have sex he just can't orgasm which drives him mad so we have given up trying for a while as I don't want to have him feel any worse. He is still very loving and we still have our hugs and kisses so that is plenty enough for me I know he loves me and I will do anything to get him through the worst of his depression. Sex is important but not as important as his wellbeing. Hopefully over time it may improve fingers crossed :-)

Hi Flomelly
Same deal with me- I joke that I'm 'dead from the waist down.' Of course I am widowed and am not dating anyone so basically, what do I care. If I were to ever become involved with anyone and wish to be intimate with them I can see where this would become a real problem.

Has your doctor said anything about taking a 'drug holiday?' Basically what that means is a person can skip one day's dose and due to the fact that it is built up to a certain level in your blood stream, it should do no harm, yet without that daily dose the person may be able to function better sexually. But honestly, it could be my imagination but when I occasionally forget to take my daily Prozac I feel like I miss it. Like one day I had not taken it yet as I typically do in the morning and I was feeling agitated. I'm sure it's probably my imagination though.

This is a great topic! I take 20mg of Prozac a day in the morning. I started this regimen 6 months ago. Since then my sex drive has fallen off of a cliff. That is a good thing for me as I am a recovering Porn addict. Nonetheless, this condition is damaging to me my relationship with my wife. How is that, you might say? Certainly any woman married to a porn addict would have reason to be grateful the Prozac can help moderate sex drive! But, what I have found is that without conjuring up images in my mind, it is difficult for me to respond to my wife when she wants to be intimate. And this really bothers me. I want to keep my BPII and addiction in check. But between gaining weight, loosing memory, and loss of sex drive, there are days I want to stop the meds!

I was a bit like this when I took Seroxat too. At the time, it did sort of lower my libido too which wasnt so bad. (i.e. couldnt perform but wasnt bothered !!!). Fortunately, my wife wasnt bothered either (long story!).

On Clomipramine now and its even worse !!!! This time libido is still there so its very frustrating indeed.

Somebody earlier mentioned viagra. Never tried it but I though all that did was keep the tyres pumped up (if you know what I mean) rather than help with the endgame? LOL.

Yeah, I was on Prozac for 8 months when I was 19-20 and had the same problem (I'm female). I couldn't orgasm at all with my boyfriend, even if he went down on me for a long time, which I love now and it's much better since I've been off it BTW. I could get off masturbating, but it would take a good hour, and would require *intense* stimulation that would often leave me sore the next day
So, no fun! Now I'm on Mirtazapine, and no sexual side effects. Before I was taking the Prozac I used to ********* every day and feel really horny, but now I only want sex a couple times a week usually, so I'm wondering if it had permanent side effects... but it doesn't do any good to worry about, maybe that's just how I am now.

Shanna,

I heard Viagra works OK for men but only works for 'some' women. Is that true?

Does it actually help with the big O as well then? My wife takes Prozac and is badly affected by this...

I took Celexa for a few days, and within hours of the first dose, it was very very difficult to achieve an orgasm. Because of the other side effects that I immediately had with it, I stopped and haven't tried an SSRI since.

In the meanwhile, I've been on shifting doses of Pristiq and Wellbutrin XL and have had no sexual problems. I am just now starting Prozac, though, and dropping the Pristiq. I have had no sexual side effects yet, something which I strongly believe is due to the Wellbutrin XL.

Wellbutrin seems to be a common add-on to an SSRI to aid in the treatment of depression, particularly symptoms related to energy and motivation, as well as functioning as a med that may help alleviate some of the sexual side effects from SSRIs. However, trying an SSRI or even another drug from a different class (like Effexor/Pristiq) may be in order. Do some research, talk to your boyfriend about it, and persuade him to talk to his psychiatrist. There are so many treatment choices out there that it is not necessary to deal with unacceptable side effects from one.

Good luck!

I enjoyed reading that as it is so true....I started taking fluoxetine....and later srtated a relationship and couldn't understand at first why I couldn't have orgasims anymore.thought I was getting too old at 48rs ha ha and that things weren't working like they used to.....but then figured that was the reason why...the medication and it is a well known fact.....so in my case I have opted not to take it...having a good sex life in itself is a good cure for depression??? depending on individuals I guess?

I'm one of those few individuals with the highly unusual side effect of prozac not merely having a completely neutral effect on my libido, but actually GIVING me one. I am an asexual person by nature - I just have 0 interest in it. However, since starting on Prozac, I have developed a libido and the ability to orgasm. Weird, eh? I don't care either way... I wouldn't go off it to reclaim the 'asexual' me, but if this particular side effect subsided I wouldn't be at all upset about it.

I'm male and on Fluoxetine (Prozac) 40 mg and, unfortunately, I have the same problem. I also take 300 mg Bupropion XL which does not help the anorgasmia in the least. The problem is very frustrating for my relationship, and has gotten serious enough that I am considering switching to another antidepressant (not that other S\NRIs have a better reputation). I've also considered getting my dosage lowered to 20 mg, though I fear it will no longer be effective.