One thing that I learned about depression is that it can be hard to stay focused. You loose your concentration. Your mind wanders off and you have jumbled thinking. In fact, my mind is having a hard time staying focused just to type out this post. That's why it can take me several minutes or an hour(depending on it's length)to type up something when a normal, clear headed, non-depressed person could do it in meer moments.

My other problem is staying focused on working on my depression. I find myself forgetting to deal with it. I'm easily distracted by other issues in my life like my noisy neighbor downstairs that seems hell bent on destroying what little sanity I have left. Then there is my unemployment issues that too distracts me from working on my depression. I think I have real avoidance issues here that are keeping me stuck where I'm at and my mind keeps coming up with ways to take my focus off my real problem(my depression). Even though unemployment, a noisy neighbor, mounting bills and life in general are important issues dealing with ones depression is even more important because once you've dealt with your biggest problem(depression)the other things will begin to fall into place.

My question is how do I stay focused? How do I stop avoiding my real issues? How do I stay focused on the task at hand without being distracted by all the other things in life you have to deal with too?

Suggestions and advice welcomed.

I am the same when I am depressed like right now.
Doing anything as simple as getting washed and dressed feels like a huge effort.
You just have to force yourself to do things but it is easier said than done.
Sometimes making a list of things to do the following day before I go to bed helps me, such as going to the gym, going for a walk, going to some social event etc.
I frequently don't stick to a list but I am more likely to do things when I make a plan for the day than not.

Hi honey,

This is a really valid point. My inability to focus is why I don't post, respond, or PM that much. I just can't focus enough to get my thoughts out.

I, too, forget to work on my depression. Especially if I'm having a better day. When I'm in crisis, the only thing I think about is getting back on track, but when I'm doing okay, I think about everything else until I find myself in crisis again.

I'm trying right now to create routines for myself. Actually, to compartmentalize my focus. It's HARD. I'm trying to devote my time in increments to the priorities in my life--school, exercise, housecleaning, admin/errands, relaxation, etc. It's hard to tell anyone how difficult that is. When I'm supposed to be concentrating on one thing, my mind seems to always be elsewhere.

I keep reminding myself that life is progressive/cumulative. My world doesn't begin and end in one moment, here and now. It builds on each thing I do.

In meditation, one learns to gently guide oneself back to the present. All of us have experienced our minds wandering. It's so natural. But we GENTLY guide ourselves back to the thought at hand. (I say this as much for me as I do for you )

As far as recovery is concerned...everything that you think about can be related to your recovery. I'm trying to think in those terms as well. When dealing with your noisy neighbor, can you think of how you can deal with it AND aid in your recovery? When dealing with mounting bills, can you think of how you can deal with them AND aid in your recovery? I don't know whether you're Borderline, but the DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) skills help a lot in this respect. Dealing with these issues builds mastery...gives you a sense of doing things (instead of just feeling things) and that makes a HUGE difference.

How do you stay focused? By GENTLY guiding yourself back when you get unfocused. Maybe you can make a list of what's on you mind...everything that's on your mind...and then prioritize it. If that project feels too big and your mind goes elsewhere, GENTLY guide it back. Don't beat yourself up. So many people who appear to be "normal" are not; they are just gentler on themselves and utilize these skills that come more naturally to them than they come to us.

Good luck, honey!

This will sound strange but I actually disagree that focussing on your depression will make you better. I have been told repeatedly by therapists and doctors, and found that it is the case, that I have to focus on things that cause or add to my depression rather than the symptoms of the deperssion itself. Sometimes that involves finding a problem-solving technique, or being proactive about a problem. Sometimes it involves just accepting a situation is the way it is and working out how I can best function in that situation.

Maybe it's because I've been dealing with this for a long time but tackling depression is rarely something you can do head on. You have to do it sideways and backwards. Some days you have to sneak up on it and others you have to chase it down. Find coping strategies, write journals, do CBT self-help books or MindGym.

I write to-do lists. I have to-do lists for everything. Seeing everything written down makes me more inclined to do it. I have specific days when I do things: washing is done on Sunday morning, grocery shopping on a Monday afternoon, cleaning on Wednesday. It helps to give me motivation, and when I have no motivation I do because it's routine and I'll panic if I don't. ANother thing that helps is don't sit down to work for hours at a time. Do 10 minutes, spend 10 minutes doing something else (maybe physical, I usually do cleaning/tidying), then come back to do another 10 minutes work. As you get better at this you can up the time you spend working. When you're having a bad day you can go back to small time increments again.

Life issues are part of the cause of depression. When they seem insurmountable, we avoid thinking about taking care of them (avoidance) and basically give up. Those problems are still there and will not disappear if we do nothing about taking care of them except compound depression.

We've given you suggestions what to do about your neighbor in a previous topic you had. It's up to you to follow through.

Unemployment: Are you up to doing a job search? Do you need help? What do you think you can do as far as work is concerned? Do you need additional training? Ask yourself these questions and answer them as honestly as you can on paper. If you say "no" to the first, make a list of "why not's" and then a list of "why yes's".

Finances/bills: Call your creditors and make payment plans with them that will fit within your budget/income. It's better to talk with creditors than ignore or not pay on the bills. Believe me, they want to be paid and will work with you if you communicate with them. I've set up payment plans with my dentist, therapist, hospital(s) and some other companies. It's taken a great deal off my mind and has helped alleiviate some of the depression.

When you manage life stressors such as these, part of the depression becomes manageable. Then you can work on the other issues that are depressing you.

The only way I can keep on task/focus, is to make a list of what I have to do and then prioritize each item. I then start with #1 resolve or do it. Go to #2 only when #1 is completed. Might take all day to get through just one thing, but I pat myself on the back for making the accomplishment.

Sheepwoman