My DW and I generally lead a quiet life getting together with our few friends on weekends for a movie or dinner etc.

For the last 10 years, every summer my (2) brothers and sister visit from abroad along with their young children and wives and spend around 1 month in Greece. Although one of their main purpose is visiting our aging parents, their visit tends to disrupt our daily lives as I will try to describe.

I feel awkward each year as the same episode plays out, we try to accomodate everyone (they don't usually plan to stay at a hotel) and we need to lend cars (they don't rent cars) and finally I get to choose each day if I prefer to spend a quiet time or spend the time with around 22 other (loud) people.

Although I do care about each one of them, lately I've avoided them and withdrawn into my own space as I've been a bit depressed. I feel guilty as I am sure that they do pick up on this and perhaps get hurt at the fact that I don't look forward to spending time with them. I subsequently feel guilty and a bit more depressed about the whole situation.

Does anyone have to deal with anything similar ? Did you find any clever way to handling this situation?

Hi drowning.

Wow. A whole month? That's a long time, in my opinion, to have house guests, even if they are close relatives. I understand what you mean about wanting to see them, but wanting to keep your house peaceful, too. My family gets together a couple of times a year, and basically we all agreed a few years ago that hotels are a good thing! And it's never for a whole month.

I'm not sure cleverness is the best way to handle this. Being honest and direct might be a better way. If you let them know that you can put them up for a week or two (or however long you'd like them to stay), but after that they'd have to rent hotel rooms is being more than fair, in my mind. Maybe you can suggest they rent a car while they're at it! Since they've been visiting for 10 summers now, they'll probably fuss. Let them. Your health is more important than grumbling relatives.

This post has been edited by SpiralingMind: Jul 13 2008, 10:55 PM

Tricky situation. Maybe start some home improvement stuff right before they arrive...
Besides that, painting/revamping a house is always fun-well, sorta. And if they help it's even better.

That's the clever thought, but what about next year?

Maybe a heart to heart talk with your Sisters and Brothers would be beneficial, you've been extremely kind through the years and maybe it's high time for them to see the light, so to say. I'm sure that things will work out for everyone.

god bless