Hello everyone!

I gave it an honest good shot this past weekend and I thought I would let you know how much it sucked.

I will not go into details about what I did but I will tell you it was among the most physically painful things I have ever experienced.

Let me give you some perspective on that statement. In my life time I have been: Shot Twice, Stabbed Twice, Blown up Four times (road side bombs, grenades, etc...), dropped eight stories from a moving aircraft without anything to slow me down, I have been set on fire once, and I have so many pieces of foreign material in my body that the surgeons actually gave up on removing it all. NOT JOKING

A friend, who could not have picked a more coincidential moment to "drop by", found me face down enjoying a terrible sesiure.
I was of course rushed to the local hospital where I had to have a number of intrusive procedures performed, which also turned out to be quite painful.
Then I got to answer all the questions I never wanted to answer.
I found the whole experience very emberassing.
Now Im in the custody/care of a "friend" and I cant even go the restroom alone with out 50 questions and a good frisking.

This has turned out to be a mistake Ill never ever ever ever never attempt again.

Please to anybody out there thinking about suicide let me tell you from the experience of getting D*** close to reaching my goal.

This is not the way to go. It hurts very bad.

Infractus

I am really, really sorry to hear that you reached that stage, infractus. It is terrible, both on yourself and those around you.

I am very glad you are still here to talk to us, however. Very glad.


Hircon

Infractus

I am so glad to see you. I am so glad that someone found you (I believe in miracles and may that be the first miracle in the start of your new life, many, many more to come) and that you realize it's not the way.
Thank you for your post.
We are here for you always and glad that you are still with us.

Trace

infractus

I too am so glad that you are still with us.

And hope that you keep posting and letting
us support you any way we can.

Your a treasured memeber here
HUGS
Isabeau

How do you feel? Are you now able to face those issues - remember we don't get as far as 'today' in a hurry, so sorting out problems that have accumulated can take a while before we feel able to move forwards. It took me 2-3 years of intermittent talking therapy to ditch my anger issues, put what happened to one side and begin to enjoy life.

Keep posting! Are you getting support following your In-patient experience?

I'm so glad to hear from you again, (((((infractus))))). I've been thinking about you ever since I unfortunately had to delete that suicidal post of yours a few days ago. The DF staff has been worried about you. You've been through some serious hell in your life, and I really think that every day you stay on this earth is a major triumph and a gift to the rest of us. Thank you for sharing your feelings here. Your post is a very powerful deterrent to anyone who is contemplating suicide. Please take care, and keep posting.

infractus,
I am glad your still alive and now you can work on getting treatment to get well.
Doug

I am glad to hear that you did not succeed and that it was so awful that you would never attempt again. I am always happy when I see a post from someone who attempted suicide and wants to tell others how terrible and painful the experience is. Good luck in your recovery from the attempt and your treatment for bipolar disorder.

Thank God you're still with us.

hello everyone

Thanks for the warm welcome back.
I really do hope that the people viewing this post can gain something from the incredibly hard lession I have had to learn.
I cant tell you I am cured because the urge and the longing is still there.
But I can tell you that I will never ever do that again. Nothing is that bad.

Thanks for the concern

Infractus

Infractus

It is a real pleasure to be here for you and I know after all you have been through, this experience will not take it all away, but we are here for you. Thank you so much, you are an inspiration.

Trace

I don't know what to say other than you seem very courageous to me. For all you've been through and are still here shows a lot. You obviously here on earth for a reason!
Hang in there!