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Hi There

Havent touched in since December.....hope everyone is doing well

Ive been spending money(credit card) ive not got on EBay, over the past 2months....(can i blame that on the meds?).....and im in trouble bcos of a reduction in my Benefit money and a claim back for overpayment of Benefit since end of Nov (son turned 18)...so subsequently an overpayment of Council Tax benefit and Housing Benefit etc...so now in effect im in arrears and now have much more to pay every week as well.

But back to the question i was posing........

HAS ANYONE HAD TO FILL IN THE INCAPACITY FOR WORK QUESTIONNAIRE(IB50 Form~20pages) AND THEN ATTEND THE MEDICAL EXAMINATION?......IF SO,HOW WAS IT?...ANY ADVICE WELCOMED...

Im at a loss what info to give under the mental health section.......How it affects me..........Im on Citalopram,but quite honestly my heads in such a muddle i cant think what my side effects are....obviously confusion!!!!but what else?....forgetfulness,tiredness,apathy.....
One thing i do notice a big difference with is my eyesight since ive been on them (Oct).......its all blurry,but comes and goes in intensity,sometimes theyre really sore and bloodshot...... when previously i could see fine.......is this a side effect or are my eyes just coincidentally playing up??Also a noise similar to a helicopter in my ears when im quiet.
I feel i have to put a good case forward for the mental health section of the form as the rest of the form(physical tasks) are not geared to my medical conditions.........ie i have chronic pain (fibromyalgia) which obviously includes pain but also insomnia,fatigue,ibs,depression etc....but the Qs are set like can you do the tasks once.....which i can...but if i were to have to repeatedly do them it would make my pain a lot worse etc.....but when i asked the advice line about this they said to answer as if i were doing it once!.....they obviously want people NOT to qualify!..surprise surprise!! Also do they try to get you with trick Qs at the medical examination?..ive read that they do...!!

Other stuff thats stressing me just now and i could use some advice on if anyone has been in my position....feel free to reply.....
At the end of November my eldest son turned 18 and at the same time quit college(dont know the underlying reasons,thinking it may have been bullying as he looks different from the rest there, he has really long hair, whereas the rest are "neds"with baseball caps and tracksuits He chose not to even travel on the bus with them,but walk the 3miles from the main town out to the college...he has come home covered in eggs,but wouldnt talk about it)
He is not looking for work,or training and refuses to make the phonecall to apply for Job Seekers Allowance....when i ask him why he says its not that easy??.........says he would rather commit suicide or live on the street and beg!

I am on Income Support as i am a lone parent and due to my medical conditions which have been long standing and progressive i was advised to claim for Incapacity Benefit, as my IS would automatically stop when my youngest is 16 and i would be expected to look for work.
So since Oct i have been sending in Medical Certs every 4wks saying im unable to work and attending all sorts of benefit interviews/Back to Work interviews etc.....and now ive been told that i have to fill in a 20 page Incapacity for Work Questionnaire and probably attend a medical examination performed by the Dept of Works&Pensions.

Meanwhile i get notification that as i have not worked in the past 2years i have not made enough Insurance Stamp contributions so i dont qualify to receive any ACTUAL money but i must still send in the Med Certs etc 2b eligible when the time comes.
My Income Support benefit has been reduced by a third and is backdated to Nov (when my son turned 18)..so i owe them money back now.
My Housing Assoc says that i must pay more rent and more council tax (although i have less income)...this too backdated to Nov...and so im in arrears to them now too.
The thing is .....although i have explained to them that my son isnt getting any income at all and im basically keeping him for free bcos he isnt included in my benefit anymore....they class that he is no longer a dependant and so should be paying a contribution for the rent & council tax......i can see how it looks to them......but it is me that is being held accountable for his non actions(ie signing on to claim benefit/or get a job)........its me who is struggling.

I tried being understanding and coaxing him as he is going through a lot of psychological stuff.......but he doesnt want my advice or help.......(before anyone suggests it, i have no family to speak to him)
So the next thing that happens im telling him IF he's not willing to do either he has to leave, as its unfair to us as a family...... he is causing me to be in so much debt.
I dont like being negative with him,.... it opens up old wounds from what it was like living with his dad.......constant state of anxiety and being put upon as im not good at standing my ground.

So he just walks out the door and ive not seen him for 4days.(still not back).....he has done this twice before in the last 2months and im worried sick about him....as when he did turn up b4 he looked really ill ( He has started smoking dope when away from the house, as i can tell a mile off.........his dad was an addict who progressed to heroin and such like)

I know it sounds bad but him leaving without a forwarding address is not going to satisfy the HA that he is no longer with me anyway!so he's not helping the situ by hiding away, wherever he is.
I will still have to pay extra rent &tax and accumalate more arrears until he faces this situation and does something about it....i feel powerless.
So he maybe thinks he's helping the situ by not being here...i dunno...or maybe he's fearful and burying his head and hoping it will all blow over?
I want the best for him as he is worth so much more than this,but i dont know how best to help turn this around?
I know a lot of folk will say that i have to let him make his own mistakes he's an adult now......easier said than done.

ANY ADVICE PLEASE

ps I know i should be doing the TOUGH LOVE thing but bcos of my low self esteem and an underlying fear that he will go further down the road of drugs like his dad....i dont want to push him out....pathetic i know!
There ive beaten myself up again....

This post has been edited by NatureSpirit: Jan 20 2007, 05:30 AM

Sorry cant help with any of your problems my kids are just tiddly's But just want to say i hope you find a solution and things get better for you soon

The thing with Ebay - yep i have been like that with it, it's soooo addictive and when i'm low i tend to spend money
Do you think your meds are working as well as they ought to?


Torchwood :cold:

HI I used to hlep out at an advice centre for people with menatl health issues and have helped people fill in IB50s.

1. Get advice from the Citizens advice or welfare rights office if you council has one.

2) Only fill in the parts relating to mental health isssues, you only need to get 10 points for MH issues and 15 points if you fill in any to do with physical difficulties so its much more difficult to get sickness because of the physical side.

I'm assuming that you are unfit for work because of depression and not your physical problems?

Fill in that you are unable to get up in the morning because the depression makes you have less motivation, do you suffer from panic attacks when you are out and about, or do you get anxious when you have to go out, do you go out at all (drs appointments etc) I'm sure you will have plenty to write about, write down everything you can.

3. Write to the Benefits people and the council tax people who are clawing back your overpayements and ask them to reduce the payments to £1 a week, you will have to draw up a list of your income and outgoings showing why you can only pay £1 a week. Again go to Citizens Advice and ask for help there. The letter could be something like

"I am writing to ask that my IS overpayment clawback be reduce to £1 per week. I have atttached an income/expenditure list showing my actual budget. I trust that you will be able to make the necessary adjustments to my overpayment reduction. "

Then do an income and expenditure list, in one column do all your income ie IS and in the other column your outgoings: Rent, Council Tax, Food, Electricitiy, Gas, Telephone, Other Debts (HP payments, clubby books etc)

4. I suggest that you apply for Disability Living Allowance, if you get it and I'm assuming that your dr would support your application. Are you seeing a specialist for your depression? Do you see your GP regularly?
If you get it, it would increase your income and also increase your IS but it does not affect your council tax rebate or your housing benefit. So it is worth applying for. There is advice in the Benefits room on DF.

5. As far as your son is concerned you have done the right thing, he MUST fill in JSA or get a sick note from the dr but he MUST apply for help if he is to live in your home otherwise you will be liable for the overpayments.

6. Yes as you have not worked in the last 2 years you won't have paid any National Insurancee contributions and that is the requirement to get Incapacity Benefit but you can get IS whilst you are signed off sick.

I hope this is of some help to you.

Eileen

whats been happening NatureSpririt?